"Kids, don't believe a word he's saying." Parents probably passed that instruction on to their children during every presidential speech for fear of grammar dysfunction. Of course, there are all sorts of other dysfunctions to worry about as well but the War on Iraq doesn't do much for a pretty childhood. Or a pretty adulthood.
The mere idea that Heidi thinks she can sing and dance is enough to infuriate anyone with a little bit of talent. Her performance at the Miss Universe 2009 Pageant was horrifying and her cheesy photo sessions with Spencer are plain disgusting. The only thing she's got are her boobs and nose, and even that was handed over to her with a scalpel.
It was good vs. evil when Kanye messed with Taylor Swift at the 2009 VMAs. After massive hate tweets (our favorite being Katy Perry's "It's like you stepped on a kitten" one), Kanye's popularity dwindled down to two: himself and his bald headed girlfriend, Amber Rose. Once Lady Gaga decided to do a solo tour without him, it became official: anybody who dons shutter shades should be left in the dust.
Not only has this man oppressed an entire country under his dictatorship, he's also admitted to producing nuclear weapons despite an agreement with the United States to forgo North Korea's program. Furthermore, he scares the bejeezus out of every hairstylist in the world today. Ruling with no moral compass AND no hairbrush? Aw, come on.
Ever since this wannabe cowboy (what's with the hideous rancho hats this season?) started seducing Heidi(ous) on The Hills, MTV viewers have yet another reason to hate the music-station-that-doesn't-play-music: introducing to us a douchebag so douche-y, we can't help but tune in. With his serial killer looks and insanely dumb remarks, Spencer successfully annoys the hell out of anyone with half a brain.
As the diamond studs on his ears got bigger and the Ed Hardy shirts got louder, it was decided: things got a lot more obnoxious once Jon Gosselin stepped onto the scene. Frolicking with attention whores (Star Magazine chick, who?) and fellow scumbags (Michael Lohan, go back to jail), this man may be the daddy of eight kids, but to the public eye, he's proven to be just an adolescent.
He draws white snuff on people's nose and other stuff (in other areas), yet his defamatory drawings doesn't seem to turn away the millions of readers who log onto his now-famous celebrity blog. Often outing celebrities on their dirtiest secret, it seems like for America, Perez Hilton, is ours. Though we often want him to shut up, we have to admit: his twitter wars with Demi Moore and Kirstie Alley are sooo addicting.
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