7 Classic Cock Blocks and How to Defeat Them
Nothing can clog a man's game up quite like a big ol' cock block. Lucky for you, this list of classic cock blocks will teach you how to spot an incoming cock block before it happens, and how to diffuse the situation before full blockage occurs. Think of it like Drano for your sex life.
7
items
5029
views
Category:
All People
Modified: 2009-12-03 18:07:33.0
|
-
BoyfriendJust because there's a goalie doesn't mean you can't score!
Every girl, given enough time, will bitch and moan about her beloved boyfriend if you have any kind of chance of wrecking their home. Once she does, the cards have been dealt and all you need to do is play 'em right and she'll be yours for the night. Just make sure you don't talk about him as much as you would if she were a friend. Don't compare yourself to him...EVER. Also make sure that you're making her feel like she's single. If she's in a relationship bad enough to cheat, then she's obviously not happy. Remind her of what she's missing by being your best self and letting her forget she's tied down. Then, and only then, will you be able to tie HER down.date_of_birth profession place_of_birth nationality gender spouse children parents Date Born Height (m) Weight (kg) institution degree major_field_of_study end_date company title -
D.U.F.F.D.esignated
U.gly
F.at
F.riend
In any group of girls there is inevitably the fat friend. She may be cool, but she has a BIG down side. Her friends won't want to give it up unless she is gettin' some too.
One of your wingmen are going to have to take the bullet on this one for the sake of the team. So draw straws and get it over with. Either that or you can play, what I like to call the highwire tightrope game. It's a careful balance between entertaining the DUFF and hitting on the girl of your dreams. Don't start hitting on the DUFF, ever! Or you will be stuck with her and her friends will leave you for real men. Unless you're into that type of thing, focus on the girls you want, but make the DUFF feel pretty and included...but not TOO pretty and included. Once she starts talking about her dogs or cats, you'll know you're in - and it's time to pull out.date_of_birth profession place_of_birth nationality gender spouse children parents Date Born Height (m) Weight (kg) institution degree major_field_of_study end_date company title -
Mother HenThe Mother Hen is one of the most difficult Cock Blocks to get around. She is the one who is injecting responsible thinking into the girls you are trying to get with. She's been hurt by guys JUST like you, fresh out of a longterm relationship with a guy who cheated on her and will NOT let her girlfriends fall prey to the evil that is enjoyment/sex/men. Get your shit together with the mother hen by not cornering the girl you're talking to. Don't ONLY talk to her and make sure to approach the group with a few friends. The more relaxed you are, the more relaxed they all are. Make sure everyone is having a good time, not just your girl. Once the Mother Hen is distracted, you can start to get more and more comfortable, but one rule:
NEVER ENGAGE IN PHYSICAL CONTACT WITH YOUR GIRL AROUND THE MOTHER HEN. She will think this is halfway to rape and you will be fucked (well, you won't, and that's the problem).
In the worst case scenario, you need a pro wing man to get this one out of the way. Make sure he is available if a Mother Hen has been spotted. They often look like the most confident ones of the bunch.date_of_birth profession place_of_birth nationality gender spouse children parents Date Born Height (m) Weight (kg) institution degree major_field_of_study end_date company title -
Ugly Best FriendThis girl is a cross between the D.U.F.F. and the Mother Hen.
And in all honesty may not be ugly, but 8 times out of 10 she's ugly.
This girl is trying to make sure her friend is doing the "right" thing. But if you have a wing man and she is getting enough attention then she'll be neutralized. Her best friend is not rocket science, unless she is 100% Mother Hen (see above).date_of_birth profession place_of_birth nationality gender spouse children parents Date Born Height (m) Weight (kg) institution degree major_field_of_study end_date company title -
Aunt FlowAunt Flow = for a week every month. If there is ANY way you can figure out a way to sneak this into a conversation, and she's open enough to let you know, then you're golden. If she lets you know too early, then it's 100% a "GTFO" situation. Get out and get out soon, you're not wanted. If you have no problem with goin' a little vampiric, then keep at it, tiger, but for the most part, women won't let you anywhere near their lady parts when they're goin' all "A Virgin Mary Statue's Eyes in a Horror Movie".
date_of_birth profession place_of_birth nationality gender spouse children parents Date Born Height (m) Weight (kg) institution degree major_field_of_study end_date company title -
"Big Brother"The "Big Brother"
This poor sap had a thing for his "Little Sister" since they met and because he didn't get her he'll try and make sure nobody does, or at least that's what Freud says...I think.
Lucky for us, this guy is a total puss, he was too big of a puss to ever put the move on the girl of his dreams and he'll be too big of a puss to compete with a man with game. Get around the brother by directing the conversation to him about 40% while talking to her for about 60% of the time. Making him feel more included will make him feel less threatened that you are going to power through his family like the mighty beard of Odin. If she digs you at all, he'll step aside for her happiness' sake. Mission accomplished.
Side note: don't let him dominate the conversation.date_of_birth profession place_of_birth nationality gender spouse children parents Date Born Height (m) Weight (kg) institution degree major_field_of_study end_date company title -
MarriageThere is a food proven to decrease a women's sex drive by 98%...
WEDDING CAKE
Married women will not do you. If they have their ring on, just have fun with them and try out one of their friends. You can use the "Boyfriend" technique for them sometimes, but if they seem like they're just being nice and "putting up" with you, consider it a fail, buddy. She's married. Sometimes married ain't married, but most married girls are totally married married. Married.date_of_birth profession place_of_birth nationality gender spouse children parents Date Born Height (m) Weight (kg) institution degree major_field_of_study end_date company title
;)
8 Comments