Best Mark Twain Quotes Quotations
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Best Mark Twain Quotes

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A list of the best Mark Twain quotes. List is arranged by which ones are the most famous Mark Twain quotes and which have proven the most popular with visitors to this page. All the top quotes from Mark Twain should be listed here, but if any were missed you can add more quotes by Mark Twain at the end of the list. This list includes notable Mark Twain quotes on various subjects; if you are looking for subject-specific quotes, those can also be found on Ranker along with the authors name.

This list answers the questions, "what is a list of Mark Twain quotes?" and "what are the most famous Mark Twain quotes?"

Vote on this Mark Twain quotations list so that only the greatest Mark Twain quotes rise to the top, as the order of the list changes dynamically based on votes. You can also see the subject these historic Mark Twain quotes displayed to the right of the quote. Don't let your favorite Mark Twain sayings get to the bottom of the list! (150 items)
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    Be good and you will be lonely.

    Mark Twain More
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    When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened or not.

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    If you are speaking the truth you don't have to remember anything.

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    Nothing that grieves us can be called little: by the eternal laws of proportion a child's loss of a doll and a king's loss of a crown are events of the same size.

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    Do something every day that you don't want to do. This is the golden rule for acquiring the habit of doing your duty without pain.

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    A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way.

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    Whenever you find that you are on the side of the majority, it is time to reform.

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    My mother had a great deal of trouble with me, but I think she enjoyed it.

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    Necessity is the mother of taking chances.

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    A banker is a fellow who lends his umbrella when the sun is shining and wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

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    In Boston they ask, How much does he know? In New York, How much is he worth? In Philadelphia, Who were his parents?

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    A classic is something that everybody wants to have read and nobody wants to read.

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    Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest.

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    I have a higher and grander standard of principle than George Washington. He could not lie; I can, but I won t.

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    If you have nothing to say, say nothing.

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    A lie can run around the world six times while the truth is still trying to put on its pants.

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    There isn't a single human characteristic that can be safely labeled as American.

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    A habit cannot be tossed out the window; it must be coaxed down the stairs a step at a time.

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    Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand.

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    Always acknowledge a fault. This will throw those in authority off their guard and give you an opportunity to commit more.

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    Methuselah lived to be 969 years old . You boys and girls will see more in the next fifty years than Methuselah saw in his whole lifetime.

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    Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear - not absence of fear.

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    Temperate temperance is best; intemperate temperance injures the cause of temperance.

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    I am opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer me the position.

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    Barring that natural expression of villainy which we all have, the man looked honest enough.

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    Adam was the luckiest man; he had no mother-in-law.

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    Obscurity and competence: That is the life that is worth living.

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    A man never reaches that dizzy height of wisdom that he can no longer be lead by the nose.

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    Be virtuous and you will be eccentric.

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    A man can seldom -- very, very, seldom -- fight a winning fight against his training; the odds are too heavy.

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    A man cannot be made comfortable without his own approval.

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    I don't like to commit myself about heaven and hell -- you see, I have friends in both places.

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    Never let formal education get in the way of your learning.

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    Be careless in your dress if you must, but keep a tidy soul.

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    Cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.

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    I have never let my schooling interfere with my education.

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    Any so-called material thing that you want is merely a symbol: you want it not for itself, but because it will content your spirit for the moment.

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    As a thinker and planner the ant is the equal of any savage race of men; as a self-educated specialist in several arts she is the superior of any savage race of men; and in one or two high mental qualities she is above the reach of any man, savage or civilized!

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    Both marriage and death ought to be welcome: The one promises happiness, doubtless the other assures it.

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    Intellectual work is misnamed; it is a pleasure, a dissipation, and is its own highest reward.

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    If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.

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    If you don't like the weather in New England, just wait a few minutes.

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    I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week, sometimes, to make it up.

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    If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you; that is the principal difference between a dog and a man.

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    In statesmanship get the formalities right, never mind about the moralities.

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    In the real world, nothing happens at the right place at the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to correct that.

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    Let us so live that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

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    When angry, count four; when very angry, swear.

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    Never learn to do anything. If you don't learn, you will always find someone else to do it for you.

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    The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up.

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