- 1+ 184- 18
Bridesmaids - Megan Single QuotevMegan: "I'm glad he's single, 'cause I'm gonna climb that like a tree."
Megan delivers this funny line after she's introduced to Annie for the first time.
- 2+ 139- 17
Bridesmaids - Megan ApologyMegan: [belches loudly] "I'm sorry. I won't apologize. I'm not confident which end that came out of."
In this scene, Megan lets out a very unlady like belch that leaves her companions disgusted.
- 3+ 104- 11
Call Me When Your Boobs Come InAnnie: "Oh, I feel bad for your parents."
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store: "I feel bad for your face."
Annie: "Okay, well, call me when your boobs come in."
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store: "You call me when yours come in."
Annie: "What do you have, four boyfriends?"
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store: "Exactly."
Annie: "Okay, yeah, have fun having a baby at your prom."
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store: "You look like an old mop."
Annie: "You know, you're not as popular as you think you are."
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store: "I am very popular."
Annie: (sticks tongue in cheek and mimics fellatio) "Oh, I'm sure you are verrrry popular."
13-Year-Old Girl in Jewelry Store: "Well, you're an old, single loser who's never going to have any friends."
Annie: "You're a little c**t!"
Yes, Annie is having a meltdown, a huge life crisis - and how does she handle it? By calling a 13-year-old customer the c-word at her jewelry store job. She just lost her only source of income. Quickly.
- 4+ 89- 9
Are You An Appliance?vAnnie: "Whatever you say, Stove."
Flight Attendant Steve: "Steve."
Annie: "Stove, what kind of name is that?"
Flight Attendant Steve: "That's not a name - my name is Steve."
Annie: "Are you an appliance?"
Flight Attendant Steve: "No I'm a man."
Annie: "You're a flight attendant."
Flight Attendant Steve: "That's absolutely accurate."
This gem of a quote comes during one of the funniest scenes in 'Bridesmaids,' as a (very) intoxicated Annie tries, unsuccessfully, to sit in first class. Poor Stove. He gets no respect.
- 5+ 56- 4
Civil RightsAnnie: "I'm gonna leave this (curtain) open! Cause, it's called civil rights! This is the 90s!"
Drunk Annie has had enough of sitting in coach. After multiple (hilarious) attempts to sit in first class, she's shooed back with the commoners - but not before saying her peace.
- 6+ 124- 19
You Are Your ProblemMegan: "I don't associate with people who blame the world for their problems. You are your problem. You are also your solution."
This quote comes in yet another scene totally stolen by Melissa McCarthy. She's trying hard to get Annie to see that she can fix what's wrong in her life - without relying on anyone else. It's a truly touching scene that really balances out the humor with a hefty dose of reality.
- 7+ 79- 11
Sad Handwritten BookvAnnie: "You read my journal?!"
Annie's Roommate: "At first I did not know it was your diary. I thought it was a very sad handwritten book."
Annie's roommates are complete and utter freaks. And nosy as hell. Did we mention freaks?
- 8+ 74- 10
American Sausage and English McMuffinvBrynn: "I have no way of earning money, unless I just go prostitute down on the street. 'Hello fellas! Here I am...put your American sausage in my English McMuffin."
Annie's roommates are just unnervingly icky. The sister, Brynn, in particular, is a total deadbeat. Here, she's explaining to Annie why she can't work and contribute to the rent. Without her work visa, she'd be forced to resort to prostitution - selling her English McMuffin on the streets!
- 9+ 33- 3
Bridesmaids - Air Marshal ScenevMegan: "I'll take first watch."
John: "I am not an air marshall. There's no...you don't need to take a watch."
Megan: "Ok...[quietly] I've got the first watch."
The delivery of these lines was flawless. The look on both their faces will make you laugh.
- 10+ 47- 7
Bridesmaids - Before Dress FittingvHelen: "It is not good to have a big meal before a fitting."
Megan: "Not for me. I naturally just don't bloat."
This is another one Megan's lines that you can help but laugh at. She is definitely one of the funniest characters in the movie.
- 11+ 43- 7
Bridesmaids - Poop SceneLillian: "I just took a s**t in the middle of the street."
This is not a line you typically hear from a female character. However, it's definitely one of Maya Rudolph's, aka Lillian's, best lines in the entire movie. It's bound to leave you snickering. Thankfully, they don't actually show her doing a number two. Although, had they, it would have been reminiscent of the potty scene in Dumb & Dumber.
- 12+ 34- 6
Pink Lemonade?vAttendant: "Are you a guest of Helen Harris III?"
Annie: "Yes, technically, I guess."
Attendant: "An attendant will meet you at the stables."
Attendant: "The shower is over the second bridge. Pink lemonade?" (hands Annie lemonade)
Annie: "Oh, um, thank you. Oh you know, I don't have a cup holder, can I just...give back..." (tries to hand lemonade back) "Pink lemonade, nice. Nice touch." (Drives and sips) "Oh god d***** that's good." (more sips) "Oh, s***, that is fresh!"
Annie is on her way to Lillian's engagement party, when she quickly realizes she's entered a super rich zone...with lemonade. Very good lemonade. Lemonade that is befitting Helen's social status.
- 13+ 33- 6
Bridesmaids - First Class Plane ScenevAnnie: "I am ready to parrrtyyy."
Annie is VERY relaxed in the scene after taking a pill to calm her nerves since she's not a fan of flying. What ensues is one of the best scenes in the entire movie. It showcases Kristin Wiig's comedic talent.
- 14+ 33- 10
Pine Needles and SunshineBecca: "You smell like pine needles, and have a face like sunshine!"
Becca utters these words to Rita after having a few too many alcoholic beverages (and confessing the sad details of her non-existent sex life).
- 15+ 31- 11
Bridesmaids - Motherhood ScenevRita: (Talking about her three sons.) "They are cute, but when they reach that age, disgusting! They smell. They are sticky. They say things that are horrible. Everything is covered in semen. I literally broke a blanket in half. Do you see what I'm saying?"
This is definitely an EW-inducing moment. Rita's obvious disgust will definitely resonate with other moms.
- 16+ 27- 9
Adult SleepoverAnnie: "We had an adult sleepover."
Lillian: "Did you let him sleep over in your mouth?"
Annie: "Well...he kept putting it around in my face..."
Raunch, pure and simple. That's 'Bridesmaids' for you! The dialogue between Annie and Lillian here no doubt elicits gales of laughter from the female audience. The men? Maybe not so much.
- 17+ 30- 12
Bridesmaids - Airplane PassengerWoman on plane: "I had a dream last night that we went down."
Annie: "Oh God."
Woman on plane: "You were in it."
This clip was featured in the original trailer for Bridesmaids. The woman sitting next to Kristin Wiig is her Bridesmaids' writing partner Annie Mumola.
- 18+ 23- 7
Bear SandwichMegan: "Bear sandwich!"
Very difficult to describe this quote in context, without giving anything away. If you've seen 'Bridesmaids,' you are likely laughing at this moment. If not? WHY haven't you SEEN this movie?!?!
- 19+ 19- 4
Slutty College YearsvBecca: "Kevin can only have sex in bed, in the dark, under the covers - only after we've showered, separately. And sometimes by the time we're finished cleaning ourselves, he's too tired. And then I pretend that I'm tired but I'm not tired, I'm not not tired...I'm not not tired."
Rita: "That's why every girl needs those s**tty college years: to experiment, get it out of your system, find out what you like."
Becca: (to flight attendant) "Excuse me, um, could I have a glass of alcohol when you get a chance?"
Rita: "Two double 7 and 7s."
Becca: "Is that..."
Rita: "You'll like it, it's sweet."
Poor, repressed Becca. She's confessing it all to fellow bridesmaid Rita: She's not getting any, and when she is it's...well, it's just freakish. Becca does, by the way, get her alcohol - then it's all sunshine and pine needles after that!
- 20+ 21- 6Megan: "Fight Club!"
Annie: "Go to a fight club."
Megan: "No we are not going to go to a fight club."
Annie: "Oh, okay."
Megan: "We are going to be the fight club."
Leave it to Megan to come up with a perfect bridesmaid's bachelorette activity! Fortunately, her idea isn't embraced - though given how funny this movie is, seeing these ladies in a fight club would probably be hilarious. Maybe in 'Bridesmaids 2?'