Five Reasons Why It'd Be Cool To Be Gay

Let's face it, people who are gay get laid way more then straight people. Alas, I am straight. But what happens if I wasn't. It's just so complicated because men don't understand women, but we understand other men. We also would know exactly what each other like because we spent most of our adolescence... and adulthood pleasing ourselves. Plus men are always horny, and if you're a gay that means... sex.

One of the biggest problems of having sex is what to say afterward. My first instinct is to run, run away. But with another guy we could just get in a quickie, watch the Bears play and then go at it again during halftime. We wouldn't even have to say anything except, "Devin Hester is the man."

If I was gay I could actually not hate her that much. To bad, I f**king hate her.

There would be less cuddling. Two reasons:
1. Men are a lot warmer then women, it be to hot.

2. Sportscenter is on for like 14 hours a day now.

It would explain my man crush on Brad Pitt if I was gay. I've seen Fight Club more times than I can count. And I'll be first in line to see Inglorious Basterds.