READ Five Reasons Why Jesus Will Never Come Back  

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God is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list Five Reasons Why Jesus Will Never Come Back
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God


God will not let Jesus come back. Why you may ask? Well, he already sent him here once and what did we do, lashed him, crowned him with thorns, and then nailed him to a cross. Who says that it will be any different this time?
Reality Game Shows is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list Five Reasons Why Jesus Will Never Come Back
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Reality Game Shows


Jesus won't come back because he is to busy watching American Idol and America's Got Talent.
The GOP is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list Five Reasons Why Jesus Will Never Come Back
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The GOP


Let's get one thing straight Republicans love themselves some Jesus, but he doesn't love them back. Destroying his planet, killing children in foreign countries for oil, and not letting poor people have health insurance. Not very Jesus like of them is it? Plus with the emergence of Jesus lover Sarah Palin my prediction of Jesus not coming back doesn't seem that unlikely.
Beards is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list Five Reasons Why Jesus Will Never Come Back
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Beards


Jesus has one of the greatest beards in history, but beards are so totally yesterday.