- 1+ 16- 6
What is the difference between a lost golf ball and the G-spot?A man will spend 5 minutes looking for the lost golf ball.
- 2+ 8- 5
Time to improveThere are three ways to improve your golf game: take lessons, practice constantly... or start cheating.
- 3+ 8- 5
Do you know why there are 18 holes on a golf course?Because that's how long it took the Scots who invented the game to finish their bottle of whiskey!
- 4+ 4- 2
- 5+ 3- 3
What do golf and sex have in common?They're two things you can enjoy even if you're bad at both of them.
- 6+ 2- 2
The less intelligent the playerThe more certain he is to offer insights into the mental side of the game.
- 7+ 2- 2
If you really want to get better at golfGo back and take it up at a much earlier age.
- 8+ 4- 5
No matter how badly you are playingIt is always possible to play worse.
- 9+ 2- 3
Did you hear about the golfer who got shot yesterday?Yes, they said it was a hole in Juan.
- 10+ 2- 3
Two kinds of bouncesUnfair bounces, and bounces just the way you meant to play it.
- 11+ 1- 2
If there is a ball in the fringe and a ball in the bunkerYour ball is in the bunker.
- 12+ 1- 3
Why do golfers always carry two pairs of trousers with them?Just in case they had a hole in one.
- 13+ 1- 3
What do you call 1,000 golfers lined up on a pebble beach holding hands?Pebble Beach Golf Links.
- 14+ 1- 3
I'm hitting the woods just great...But having a terrible time getting out of them!
- 15+ 1- 3
Be Tiger WoodsIf you want to hit a 7-iron as far as Tiger Woods does, simply try to lay up just short of a water hazard.
- 16+ 1- 3
The less skilled the playerThe more likely he is to share his ideas about the golf swing.
- 17+ 0- 2
Word G.O.L.F.My uncle, who has golfed all his life, has his own definition of the word G.O.L.F.: Getting Old and Living Fine!
- 18+ 0- 2
ThinkWhatever you think you’re doing wrong is the one thing you’re doing right.
- 19+ 0- 2
Golf a Sin?After church one Sunday, one of the church goers walked up to his priest and said, "Father, is it a sin to play golf on Sundays?" "My son," said the priest, putting his hand on the man's shoulder, "I've seen your golf game, it's a sin any day".
- 20+ 0- 2
Where can you find 100 doctors all at the same place on any given day?"A golf course!!"
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