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- 1Up 600Down 96There are two things you need to know about the 2009 film Powder Blue: 1) It marks Patrick Swayze's last time on the big screen, 2) It features Jessica Biel working the pole in black lacy lingerie, a white corset, a sassy pink bobbed wig, and all sorts of crazy gravity-defying positions.
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- 2Up 430Down 210Closer (2004): In one of the most uncomfortable movies you could ever watch with your parents, Natalie Portman, in only a metallic thong and fringey bra thing, squats all spread-legged in front of luckiest-man-alive Clive Owen. Oh, to be the dollar bill in that garter belt. This is exactly what I imagine the little girl in The Professional grew up to be.
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Flashing her butt in granny panties Part 1.
Bending over in a pink dress
Flashing in granny panties Part 2.
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- 3Up 395Down 195In the movie Sin City (2005), Jessica Alba gyrates in slow motion for what feels like a whole minute. She doesn't take off her clothes, and this is the only time you see her do this in the movie, but still, every man on the planet went apesh*t. What else do you expect from graphic novel nerds? This is one of the hottest scenes in any movie ever. I'm no expert (yes I am), but I think Jessica Alba could probably be an IRL stripper.
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- 4Up 303Down 86How did the guys of Dogma (1999) know that Salma Hayek was my muse? Celestial Serendipity got herself a corporeal body so she could get credit for her work. Then she put on a mix of hot-for-teacher horn-rimmed glasses and girl-next-door pigtails and satin underwear and danced around for me and the boys. It was nice.
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The best Salma GIF on the Internet
Salma Hayek flips out over a snake
- 5Up 241Down 73Dish Dogs (2000) is a direct-to-video rom-com that stars Matthew Lillard. Is that all you need to know about it? Well, yes, except that Shannon Elizabeth is also on the cover of the DVD in a black bikini. She does a James Bond-style striptease in tall boots, and while she doesn't show any more of her naked body than she did in American Pie (because there's nothing left), there is something to be said for leaving a little to be desired.
Shannon Elizabeth plays Black Ops...she just keeps getting hotter
Shannon Elizabeth NSFW
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