Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates movie quotes tell the story of two brothers who are tasked with bringing two nice girls to their sister's destination wedding. The comedy was written by Andrew J. Cohen and Brendan O'Brien. Directed by Jake Szymanski, Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates opened in theaters on July 8, 2016.
In Mike and Dave Need Wedding Dates, parents Burt (Stephen Root) and Rosie (Stephanie Faracy) sit sons Dave (Zac Efron) and Mike (Adam DeVine) down ahead of daughter Jeanie's (Sugar Lyn Beard) wedding to Eric (Sam Richardson). Burt and Rosie clearly explain that the boys have a history of wrecking family gatherings and that this behavior will absolutely not be tolerated at the destination wedding in Hawaii. To prevent any mishaps, Burt and Rosie demand that Dave and Mike bring dates to the wedding.
To fulfill the demand, Mike and Dave seek out dates, including going on national television to advertise their need. This entices Tatiana (Aubrey Plaza) and Alice (Anna Kendrick), who will do whatever it takes to get that free trip to Hawaii. After some maneuvering and fudging of the truth, the ladies end up joining the brothers on the trip. But the whole plan backfires when they land in Hawaii and the ladies end up being the ones causing havoc and only egging the guys on to join them.
Bring a Date to Your Sister's Wedding
Mike: Mom and dad, what's going on here?
Burt: Over the years at our family gatherings, you two show up and you ruin it. I want you to bring a date to your sister's wedding. I don't want you showing up stag and riling each other up.
Mike: We don't rile each other up!!
Dave: We never get riled up!!
Dave: We'll shape up for you, Jeanie.
With their daughter, Jeanie's, wedding approaching, parents Burt and Rosie sit obnoxious sons Mike and Dave down for a serious talk. They don't want the boys ruining the wedding so they demand Mike and Dave find dates to bring to keep them in line.
I Saved Her Life!!
Alice: They're leaving!
Tatiana: It's all part of the plan.
Mike: Are you okay?
Tatiana: I am now.
Mike: I saved her life! I saved her life!
Alice and Tatiana happen to run into Mike and Dave at a bar in a secret attempt to woo the boys into picking them for the Hawaii trip. Tatiana is dedicated to the cause, even throwing herself in front of a car so Mike can swoop in and save her life.
We're Looking for Nice Girls
Dave: We've got to find the right girls for this. Where do we even go? ... What?
Mike: We're about to do something awesome.
Wendy Williams: I'm here with Mike and Dave Stangle. They are looking for dates for their sister's wedding in Hawaii.
Tatiana: Let's make these guys take us to Hawaii!
Dave: We're looking for nice girls.
Tatiana: We're going to look respectable as...
When Mike and Dave announce on the Wendy Williams Show that they need dates for a destination wedding in Hawaii, Tatiana's and Alice's ears perk up. They are totally game for a free trip to Hawaii and determined to do what it takes to get it.
Sounds Like You Guys Are Watching Porno
Alice: Tatiana, they've got C**kbusters.
Mike: That sounds like you guys are like watching porno.
Alice: They have the Rodfather. I don't know if we're going to get it though if we haven't seen the Godfather.
When Mike knocks on the ladies' hotel room door to offer some greetings, it appears that the girls have some naughty plans for the night. Despite Tatiana's denial, the movie titles Alice mentions suggest that they're about to get down with some adult films.
Burn Victim Barbie
Mike: Oh my god, she supermans!
Tatiana: Your turn, Mike!
Dave: Don't ever do that!
Mike: I can do anything that they can do.
Jeanie: Is it okay?
Mike: She looks like burn victim Barbie, and you're black Ken.
As Mike and Dave compete with Tatiana and Alice, the pairs take turns on ATVs. So when Tatiana shows off a slick move, Mike tries to copy, except his attempt has some traumatic results.
She's Super Smart
Dave: Grandma, meet Alice. She's super smart.
Mike: Tatiana, she's a school teacher.
Tatiana: The key to teaching children is repetition. You'd be surprised how stupid they are.
Mike and Dave introduce their dates to the rest of their family in Hawaii. While the guys think Tatiana and Alice are smart, respectable women, it's an act that the ladies find hard to pull off.