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By nlsn
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Movies Kubrick Should Have Directed
We all appreciate the work of Stanley Kubrick but we should confess, Spartacus, Lolita and Eyes Wide Shut are Stanley's most tiresome films and are too boring to hold our interest. How can the same auteur behind The Shining, Clock Work Orange, Barry Lyndon and 2001 have wasted his time with those other flicks when he could have been making these following films epic(er) instead...
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Lament not for Benjamin; he is one of the most intrinsically bland characters in all of cinema. Kubrick understood the difference between creating epic images that are defined by their subjects actions, strengthened by artful special effects, and... the opposite. Kubrick was able to showcase singularly creative performances whilst storytelling on a grand scale. I'd rather him try and make Brad Pitt wrinkly than Tom Cruise tortured and interesting any year.David Fincher2008-11-26Brad Pitt,Taraji P. Henson,Elle Fanning,Tilda Swinton,Julia Ormond,Jared Harris,Jason FlemyngEric Roth,F. Scott FitzgeraldFrank Marshall,Kathleen Kennedy,Ray StarkUnited StatesAlexandre DesplatPG-13 (USA)Paramount Pictures,Warner Bros.Benjamin Button,Elizabeth Abbott -
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Whats worse? Killing Liam Neeson after spending an entire film developing his character or killing the primary bad ass villain hero-slayer a few seconds after? Hint: a good way to begin an epic saga is not to do both. Even after Obi wan was killed in "episode 4" Darth Vader wasn't immediately killed before the credits... thus resolving all narrative tension beyond some mumblings of a "master and apprentice" (ooo scary...). Besides you can't kill off Liam Neeson and expect Hayden Christensen to fill the void and carry the films like Harrison Mother F$%cking Ford did after Lucas wiped out Alec Guinness. I would rely on Kubrick to see these terrible gaping missteps coming a mile away and be smart enough to craft a story arc worthy of the undertaking instead of a series of movies that all resolve themselves at the end of each chapter and are barely relevant to the other outside of a fans interest in the originating series. Now granted Kubrick can be one for what some consider droll dialog but he sure as hell wouldn't cast some 20 year old Canadian with no experience and no spine to carry what should be a series of ever evolving mythic masterpieces.George Lucas1999-05-19Ewan McGregor,Natalie Portman,Liam Neeson,Ian McDiarmid,Samuel L. Jackson,Kenny Baker,Jake Lloyd,Frank Oz,Keira Knightley,Ray Park,Terence Stamp,Pernilla AugustGeorge LucasGeorge Lucas,Rick McCallumFantasy,Science fictionBen BurttDavid TattersallUnited StatesJohn WilliamsStar Wars Episode I: The Phantom MenacePG (USA)Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the ClonesStar Wars Episode VI: Return of the JediJedi20th Century Fox,LucasfilmObi-Wan Kenobi,Padmé Amidala,Qui-Gon Jinn,Mace Windu,R2-D2,Anakin Skywalker,Yoda,Sabé (Decoy Queen),Darth Maul -
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If I need to say more then I can't help you understand.Steven Spielberg2001Haley Joel Osment,Jude Law,Ashley Scott,Frances O'Connor,Ben Kingsley,Meryl Streep,Chris Rock,Robin Williams,Jake Thomas,William Hurt,Sam Robards,Brendan Gleeson,Enrico ColantoniBrian Aldiss,Ian Watson,Steven SpielbergBonnie Curtis,Jan Harlan,Kathleen Kennedy,Stanley Kubrick,Steven Spielberg,Walter F. ParkesScience fictionMichael KahnJanusz KamińskiUnited StatesJohn WilliamsA.I.PG-13 (USA)Artificial intelligenceAmblin Entertainment,DreamWorks,Warner Bros.David,Gigolo Joe,Gigolo Jane,Monica Swinton,Narrator,Blue Fairy,Comedian Mecha,Dr. Know,Martin Swinton,Professor Allen Hobby,Henry Swinton,Lord Johnson-Johnson -
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The Catcher In The RyeThe razor tongue and socially disassociated exploits of Holden Caulfield have yet to be adapted into film. Being that Kubrick picked projects based on strong literary foundations and his desire to explore the motives of a character and narrative themes, rooted to events, he most surely would have done a bang up job on Rye. Though Kubrick carefully avoided making the same movie twice he did circle back and explore similar themes. Full Metal Jacket is a sister film to Paths of Glory, and Barry Lyndon was taken on after his plans for a similar period film exploring the life of Napoleon was/were dashed by the inability to secure significant financial backing. Though Clockwork Orange and Catcher in the Rye have similar disaffected main characters who both narrate their tales I believe the New York of holden Caulfield would have benefited grandly from the informed undertaking of the Bronx boy Stanley.
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