G Options B Comments & Embed
- 1+ 7- 3
My Personal FavoriteMr. Blonde: Listen kid, I'm not gonna bulls**t you, all right? I don't give a good f**k what you know, or don't know, but I'm gonna torture you anyway, regardless. Not to get information. It's amusing, to me, to torture a cop. You can say anything you want cause I've heard it all before. All you can do is pray for a quick death, which you ain't gonna get.
Mr. Blonde: You ever listen to K-Billy's "Super Sounds of the Seventies" weekend? It's my personal favorite.
- 2+ 7- 3
Are You Gonna Bark Or Bite?Mr. Blonde: Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
Mr. White: What was that? I'm sorry, I didn't catch it. Would you repeat it?
Mr. Blonde: Are you gonna bark all day, little doggy, or are you gonna bite?
- 3+ 7- 4
Mr. Purple Or Mr. PinkMr. Brown: Yeah, yeah, but "Mr. Brown"? That's little too close to "Mr. S**t".
Mr. Pink: Yeah, "Mr. Pink" sounds like "Mr. P***y". Tell you what, let me be Mr. Purple. That sounds good to me. I'm Mr. Purple.
Joe: You're *not* Mr. Purple. Somebody from another job's Mr. Purple. You're Mr. Pink!
- 4+ 4- 3
Resolved the Beating UpNice Guy Eddie: The chick got tired of him beatin' her so one night she walks in the guys bedroom and super glues his dick to his belly. Ambulance came and had to cut the prick loose.
Mr. White: Was he all pissed off?
Nice Guy Eddie: How would you feel if every time you had to take a piss you had to do a f**kin' hand stand?
- 5+ 3- 2
I Don't TipNice Guy Eddie: C'mon, throw in a buck!
Mr. Pink: Uh-uh, I don't tip.
Nice Guy Eddie: You don't tip?
Mr. Pink: Nah, I don't believe in it.
Nice Guy Eddie: You don't believe in tipping?
Mr. Blue: You know what these chicks make? They make s**t.
Mr. Pink: Don't give me that. She don't make enough money that she can quit.
Nice Guy Eddie: I don't even know a f**king Jew who'd have the balls to say that. Let me get this straight: you don't ever tip?
Mr. Pink: I don't tip because society says I have to. All right, if someone deserves a tip, if they really put forth an effort, I'll give them something a little something extra. But this tipping automatically, it's for the birds. As far as I'm concerned, they're just doing their job.
Mr. Blue: Hey, our girl was nice.
Mr. Pink: She was okay. She wasn't anything special.
Mr. Blue: What's special? Take you in the back and suck your dick?
Nice Guy Eddie: I'd go over twelve percent for that.
- 6+ 3- 2
I Don't Wanna Kill AnybodyMr. Pink: I don't wanna kill anybody. But if I gotta get out that door, and you're standing in my way, one way or the other, you're gettin' outta my way.
- 7+ 4- 4
Who Was Christie Love?Mr. Pink: What was the name of the chick who played Christie Love?
Nice Guy Eddie: Pam Grier.
Mr. Orange: No it wasn't Pam Grier. Pam Grier was the other one. Pam Grier did the film. Christie Love was like Grier TV Show without Pam Grier.
Mr. Pink: So who was Christie Love?
Mr. Orange: How the f**k should I know?
Mr. Pink: Great. Now I'm totally f**king tortured.
- 8+ 3- 3Mr. Pink: Look, I ordered coffee. Now we've been here a long f**king time and she's only filled my cup three times. When I order coffee, I want it filled *six* times.
Mr. Blonde: Six times. Well, what if she's too f**king busy?
Mr. Pink: The words "too f**king busy" shouldn't be in a waitress's vocabulary.
Nice Guy Eddie: Excuse me, Mr. Pink, but I think the last f**king thing you need is another cup of coffee.