11 Studies Clearly Conducted to Get Women to Put Out More Anything
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11 Studies Clearly Conducted to Get Women to Put Out More

At the end of the day, you can’t question science. After all, it explains why up is down, leads to medical breakthroughs, and unravels the greatest mystery of all: magnets, and how they work. But did you know that science also has a major focus on getting men laid? Time and time again, science is used for the benefit of all mankind’s boners. Researching this list shattered all of my preconceptions about scientists: the respectability, the comforting stoicism, and the lab coats, and has replaced it with the end credits of The Man Show.

This is a list of the health benefits of sex, semen and male sperm. Is sex scientifically proven to be good for your health? Yes. Yes, it is, according to these studies that were clearly conducted to get women to put out more. These doctors and scientists say that having more sexy-time can prevent cancer, diminish wrinkles and fine lines, increase life expectancy and well-being, cure migraines, incontinence, the common cold, and morning sickness. Sex is a miracle cure and it is free for the taking, ladies! What are the benefits of sex?

Having regular sexual intercourse has many physical, psychological, biological and social benefits for both men and women. But sometimes some ladies and gentlemen don't feel up for a rigorous sex regimen. Sometimes they are tired. Why don't women want to have sex all the time? Because they have migraines, a cold, or are feeling down and don't yet know that sex is actually a secret miracle cure for all of these ailments! So gather 'round, ladies stop your whining, and men arm yourself with this list of studies that prove sex is good for you.
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    Doctors Say Looking at Well Endowed Women for 10 Minutes a Day Is Good for Your Health

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    A German study, published in the New England Journal of Medicine, concludes that staring at women's t-shirt stretchers for a few minutes daily is better for your health than going to the gym.

    "Just 10 minutes of looking at the charms of well-endowed females is equivalent to a 30-minute aerobics work-out," said author Dr Karen Weatherby, an expert on ageing.

    See guys, not all news from Germany is terrible!

    Completely ignoring the logic that if this were true, men would never get sick or die ever, this study insists that men who were told to stare at bosoms daily (they had to be told?) had lower blood pressure and slower resting pulse rates and also decreased their risk of coronary artery disease. Thank god I know this, because I was scared I was going to have to jog or squat or move or something.

    It’s worth noting that the research team spent five years working on this discovery. Five years of staring at funbags, no doubt funded by some sort of grant: It’s a project that Peter Venkman could only dream of.

    Apparently there are also some specific time and size correlations: men over 40 should spend at least ten minutes daily admiring heaven-sacks sized D-cup or larger.

    (Read more)

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