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The "I Know I'm Sexy" DrunkThis is #1 because everyone has been this kind of drunk.
Drinking that liquid courage somehow makes everyone's fat rolls disappear, which increases their self-esteem 10-fold to delusional, and likely unrealistic, proportions.
That hairy mole on their face vanishes, the fact that their size XXL shirt makes them look like a sausage goes out the window, and their life, despite every reasonable factor to the contrary, is awesome.
They are now a golden God (or Goddess).
So, why not show everyone what they've got because there is NO WAY they're not getting laid today! Why? Because they remembered to wear pants!
Drunk and Passed OutThis kind of drunk succumbs to the sandman before anybody else and passes out; serene, occasionally nauseous, and completely vulnerable to their friends' God-given right to f**k with them.
When your body says pass out, you pass out! There is nothing you can do about it. But there is EVERYTHING your friends can do to humiliate you.
The "I Think Everything Is Funny'" DrunkEverything is funny when you're a laugh-y drunk. Just ask the probably now-pregnant and undoubtedly very easy girl in this video.
The "I Think I Can Dance" DrunkSimilar to the "I think I'm sexy" drunk, this drunk exudes (unfounded) confidence.
This kind of drunk has the blood (alcohol level) of a dancer (homeless guy) running through their veins and they will stop at NOTHING to show you the skills they were born with.
Also, it's probably not a good idea to dance when the whole room is spinning unless you're Jackie Chan or unless someone has a video camera or camera phone handy.
The "I Want To Kick Everyone's Ass" DrunkWe all get stupid when we're pissed, faced or piss-faced, but there is always that drunk that feels the need to start some some serious guff (yes, I said "guff) with everyone and anyone that looks at him (or her) wrong.
Why? Most likely because they're insecure.
Or a Karate master.
Or (apparently) Russian (video).
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