Hellmann's Owner Sues Competition for Using the Word 'Mayo'
Mayonnaise. You eat it. You love it. You can't eat sandwiches/live without it. But do you really know it?
According to Unilever (Hellman's parent company), federal regulators specifically define mayonnaise as a spread that contains eggs. Which is why they're not happy that a competitor is trying to pass off an egg-free version as the real stuff. The nerve!
Hampton Creek's "Just Mayo" uses plant products instead of chicken eggs in its spread. Unilever contends that by calling their decidedly non-mayo product "Just Mayo," Hampton Creek is participating in false advertising and stealing the market share that is rightfully Hellman's.
"Consumers and cooks have an expectation that mayonnaise should both taste and perform like mayonnaise. Just Mayo does neither," the complaint states. BURN.
Hampton Creek CEO Josh Tetrick doesn't think it's a big deal. "Today it's mayo, tomorrow it's a cookie ... next year it will be pasta," he said. "Maybe we'll see big cookie and big pasta lawsuits against us next."
Careful Tetrick, big mayonnaise is a $2 billion industry. This food fight's about to get real (mayo).
Source: Fox News
Man Sues British Airways for Sending Him to Grenada Not Granada
Geography is tough. In 2014, American dentist Edward Gamson planned himself a trip to the beautiful southern city in Spain, named Granada. He was especially excited for the trip due to his lifelong interest in Islamic art and his Spanish Jewish heritage. Despite his insistence with his travel agent that he wanted to visit Granada, Spain, imagine his surprise when he ended up on a nine hour flight to the Caribbean island of Grenada.
When British Airways refused to reimburse Gamson and his partner for the $4,500 first class tickets, he decided to sue the airline, for $34,000 in damages. Though there was likely much pain and suffering he had to endure as a result of the mixup, he still got a trip to the Caribbean!
Lesson learned: always double check your spelling (and maybe a map) when booking travel.
McDonald's Mentally Scars a Man With Napkin Thriftiness
Webster Lucas, a California man who recently had a unsatisfactory visit at a Pacoima, CA McDonald's restaurant, has not had enough...napkins, that is.
On a visit in late January, 2014, Lucas alleges that after asking for an extra napkin with his food, the Manager on duty - described as a Mexican-American - mumbled something that Lucas took to be racially discriminating. He claimed in a letter to the location's General Manager that the incident left him "unable to work because of the undue mental anguish and the intentional infliction of emotional distress" caused by the man who may or may not have provided him with an extra napkin.
The price tag Mr. Webster has assigned to his emotional and mental distress? $1.5 million dollars. Frivolity: He's Lovin' It!
Man Sues Dry Cleaners for $67 Million for Losing Pants
"I'll sue the pants off you!"... literally.
A Washington, D.C. judge took his pants to get dry-cleaned at a family-owned business called Custom Cleaners. According to him, they never returned the correct pair of pants, and betrayed the "satisfaction guaranteed" sign in their store. This served as enough reason to sue the business for 67 million dollars for losing his pants a.k.a. the most expensive pants in the history of pants.
Later on, he was gracious enough to drop the case down to only, just only, 54 millions dollars - what a nice guy, right?
Lawsuit language has never sounded so beautiful. Roy Pearson, the offended pants-man, passionately describes his mental suffering, inconvenience, and discomfort at the hands of a business where "never before in recorded history have a group of defendants engaged in such misleading and unfair business practices" to the judge. Basically, life without pants has been hell.
Pearson continued his tirade, always referring to himself as we (until the judge corrected him), in hopes he could get the thousands of Americans who are subject to "satisfaction guaranteed" signs to stand up and fight for their rights for quality service.
The case ended with the dry-cleaner owner holding up a pair of pressed pants, facing the judge, the jury and the plaintiff, and delivering the final blow to Pearson's case. "These are your pants," he said. Pearson ran out of the testimony, tears streaming down his face, shocked at such an injustice. To this day, he denies that those are his pants.
The epic 4 page story on ABC's website.
Woman Sues Google Maps for Bad Directions
It's official. Technology has replaced all common sense and brain function. Curse you, Google. We are helpless without you. And especially helpless if you are Lauren Rosenberg.
The specifics of this story involve Rosenberg trying to walk from 96 Daly Street, Park City, Utah, to 1710 Prospector Avenue, Park City, Utah, using Google Maps on her BlackBerry as her guide. Part of the Google directions she got involved a half-mile walk down Deer Valley Drive. When she got there, she found that the road itself had no pedestrian pathway or sidewalks. Why? Because Deer Valley Drive was also known as Utah State Route 224.
However, Rosenberg continued following directions and started walking right down a major, major higway with a lot of high-speeding cars. When she got hit by one, she sued Google for leading her there. She demanded $100,000, claiming the directions were unreasonable and unsafe, despite the fact the road was obviously unfit for pedestrians and that upon the map, Google clearly marks Route 224 as a major thoroughfare. Rosenberg apparently never saw the side roads she could have used. Nor did she pay attention that Google posts a warning about the safety and reliability of its directions with every map search.
To be fair, the warning apparently never shows up in cellphones or when giving directions. And apparently it doesn't show up in people's brains either. It has come to the point where if Google tells you to walk into the middle of a heavily-used highway, so be it.
Woman Sues Halloween Horror Nights Because It Was "Too Scary"
A woman sued Universal Studios because it was causing her "emotional distress." The distress in question happened when Cleanthi Peters and her granddaughter exited a ride to find an employee with a chainsaw leaping out of the dark and chasing them out of the ride.
They swore that Leatherface was attacking them in the middle of public, like any logical human being attending an event at a park that markets itself as the scariest experience you'll ever have at a theme park and often features headlining attractions such as 3D Saw-style torture and a haunted house filled with your darkest fears.
Screaming, they ran out of the ride, out onto the park and slipped on a wet spot, leaving them helpless when Leatherface caught up to them and brandished his chainsaw in their faces. There was much crying and hugging and praying galore and there probably were some clothes that needed to be changed.
Instead of feeling thankful of being alive, the woman turned around and sued the park for $15,000 dollars. Why didn't she win? Well, only because the park was going through "Halloween Horror Nights" and they "alley" where this happened was the Haunted House.
"The line for this bathroom is really long-oooooh My GOD!"
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