The 13 Greatest Video Game Movies That Almost Were
Brian Gilmore Aside from romantic comedies starring more than 90 characters at a time, video game movies are pretty much the worst genre in film. It's not that games make way for bad movies, it's just that Hollywood hasn't figured out what to do with a video game plot yet. Resident Evil came close, but that hardly excuses things like Bloodrayne and even Super Mario Bros., as far as the genre goes. But more than the films that have been made, there are those that sound like they actually might be really damn good... but never end up happening. Directors back out, and nobody wants to stick with them, but they could have been insanely awesome. So here are the greatest video game movies that almost were and someday may be, but are currently dead in the water.
- 6
Fallout
Interplay & Bethesda Softworks's Fallout franchise had an idea for a Fallout movie in the late 90s after the 1997 film. They actually rushed it into development in 1998 and even chose a writer for the movie in Brent V. Friedman (you can download his treatment for the movie which is, thankfully, as far as it got here. PDF WARNING).BUY @ amazon
Fallout is a brilliant role-playing game that includes some great imagery, much like Bioshock in some ways, in that it uses a retro-feel to give you an alternate-reality that seems somewhat feasible. The basic premise of Fallout, as you can imagine, involves nuclear war. After petroleum and fossil fuel levels reach a critical state of depletion in the world, everyone nukes each other, which leaves places like the U.S. in exactly what everyone was scared would happen during the Cold War.
This could be an awesome, terrifying and hilarious romp through what could have been filled with action, mystery and a creepy feeling that something's just not right about the world and everything that happened prior. Is the world that existed before hand even something worth trying to recover?
Even the story lends itself to a small "District 9" feel (which is apparently the benchmark anyone uses for a lower-budget movie that isn't a straightfoward action flick).
So What Happened?
Well, first of all, they hired the writer of Mortal Kombat: Annihilation. I don't care how young you were when you saw it, that movie is ass. The first Mortal Kombat, on the other hand, was fun if you were as young as I was, but even at a young age, when I saw Annihilation I knew it was crap.
So yeah, they hired a writer who can't write past the B.S. radar of a 4th grader.
Aside from that Interplay closed down their barely existent "Film Division" in the late 90s, which kind of put an end to any hope of the movie being made at all.
Most recently, in 2009, Bethesda began going through the process of getting the trademarks for movies for their own games. So hey, who knows, maybe we'll see a Fallout movie, or better yet, a Fallout series along the lines of what they did with The Walking Dead. - 7
Shadow of the Colossus
Alright, so this is a video game adaptation that could have been good through the grace of some kind, randomly-nice and completely insane God.BUY @ amazon
Shadow of the Colossus, for the uninitiated, is one of the most beautiful, haunting and artful video games of all time. Often used in discussions about whether or not video games should be considered "art", this game, in its entirety is gorgeous. It is lonely, it is epic and it is a 1 Player experience unlike almost any other in games. It takes you everywhere emotionally, and deserves a star treatment.
Especially after the success of Thor (both financially and critically), a Shadow of the Colossus movie would be great in the hands of a director that knows the main character, has a structural and well-definied vision and has the competency to pull it off.
We'd also need a dedicated, organic writer that knows how to adapt concepts into characters that feel reel, and we'd also need someone who has experience in mostly film, not so much adaptation.
So What Happened?
Enter Sony Pictures, and their choice of writer, Justin Marks. In case you don't know this slightly under-experienced writer penned the epic failure of a film (box office and critical) that everyone wishes didn't exist: Street Fighter The Legend of Chun-Li.
Here are some clips of Justin Marks's writing one of the most interesting and enigmatic characters in game history: Charlie from Street Fighter (in the hands of the ever-a-douchebag-actor, Chris Klein):Everything Chris Klein Says in "The Legend of Chun Li" from Jeff Rubin on Vimeo.
Yeah... so... this movie, according to Sony, will be in 3D. And if it happens, this writer will be in control. This really could have been the one to prove that video games deserve "real" movies. But if this movie continues on the track it's on, sometime around 2013, we can all expect to lose one more solid argument as to why video games should be taken seriously as a medium. - 8
Sam Raimi's World of Warcraft
I don't know about you, but I treat Spider-Man 3 like I would a huge mistake my wife made. It hurt a lot, but really, the rest of our relationship has been so great, and the circumstances surrounding the mistake were so out of his hands, that I still trust him. Drag Me To hell is easily one of the greatest times I've ever had in a theatre.BUY @ amazon
So, who better than an actual WoW fan to direct the WoW movie? The talented visionary of 2 solid Spider-Man films and the Evil Dead franchise? hell yeah.
Sam Raimi is said to be directing a movie adaptation of the most popular MMORPG of all time (or at least the one that's claimed the most lives/marriages).
It would have an approximate $100 Million budget and would be quite an epic movie indeed.
So What Happened?
This is still, to a certain degree, up in the air. Blizzard Games has been making deals with Legendary pictures since 2006, and Sam Raimi has been outspokenly excited about the project, as of 2009 Mashable reports.
In January of 2010, Raimi was rumored to be directing the WoW movie after he finished Spider-Man 4, but we all know how that ended. So, naturally, he should be focusing on WoW, right? Well, no, he's directing that Wizard of Oz movie that keeps changing lead actors. Then in mid 2010 he was quoted in an interview talking about the movie, so at this opint, it's really anyone's guess.
With Raimi on board theoretically, but budgets, studios and distribution yet to be decided, this could be one of those things that goes into development purgatory for years. - 9
God of War
In 2009 it was announced that X-Men movie franchise ruiner and all-around internet fall guy Bret Ratner would be making a God of War movie.BUY @ amazon
This is like hearing that George Lucas was going to reboot the Star Trek franchise.
Having never proven competency in anything other than cheesey buddy comedies, nobody wanted to see Brett Ratner, a guy that couldn't even execute an X-Men movie that had an arguably potentially great story (Joss Whedon did a great job with it in the comics), direct one of the most violent, hardcore and amazingly well-done games in history.
A God of War movie could be treated like Thor, or hell, even like 300 in the hands of someone who knew what they were doing. As long as they understand Kratos, the movie would be fantastic.
So What Happened?
Well, Brett Ratner, first of all. But after that, not much. Over a year after Ratner's involvement was announced, in 2010, almost everyone who was confirming the film a year before completely either jumped ship or acted they were asked to name a one-night-stand's eye color.
The game director said "we actually don't have any creative control over it at all" and said he didn't know what was happening with the project. Sony's director of Product Development said "I don't believe anything other than a script has transpired at this stage... if we hear something, then we'll know... but at this point... we've heard nothing."
So it looks like this one, thankfully, has been shelved and hey who knows, maybe Brett Ratner's so busy that they'll hand it to someone who can handle it, which would be awesome.
But almost, guys... almost. This one is less of a "why didn't this happen" and more of a "dear Lord what a close call".
Until then, we have this amazing fan-made trailer of what God of War would be like in the context of a Wes Anderson-esque indie dramedy: - 10
John Woo's Metroid
In 2004, John "I Directed Awesome Action Movies Then Came to Hollywood to Direct Face/Off, Broken Arrow and Mission: Impossible 2" Woo bought the rights to make a Metroid movie. Say what you will about the man, he's never really tried anything along the lines of what would be a Metroid movie.BUY @ amazon
So What Happened?
The rumormill went nuts. It got to the point where there was even some NYC Comic-Con hype, as well as a popular poster (seen below) that was supposedly going to be the announcement of the film.
Since then there hasn't been a major John Woo release (Red Cliff doesn't count) and he really hasn't been pushing the project forward.
Maybe he did with the movie what I used to do to rare Ninja Turtles toys when I was little. I would go to the toys section and hide the best ones behind a bunch of Barbies so that when my mom and I came back the next day, it'd still be there for me, where nobody else would know about it.
Maybe he's doing what most people do with good ideas for domains.
I sincerely think that John Woo has parked the Metroid movie. Maybe he's that big a fan that he doesn't want to see anyone tarnish Samus, or maybe he really did mean to make something of it.
Either way, the project hasn't been heard of since the dead hype and John Woo's just really not making "big" movies anymore.
items 6 - 10 of 13
today on Ranker
start a list with results
close sorting window
Rank Name
use the search box to filter your list
leave a comment
The 13 Greatest Video Game Movies That Almost Were at 7/16/2012 3:30 PM
The 13 Greatest Video Game Movies That Almost Were at 6/23/2011 3:37 AM
the stories are designed to set up gameplay, not relate some
sweeping epic like, say, Star Wars( Ever notice that the Star Wars
games tend to have rather lame stories?). The reason is that
there is almost no character developement, a vital part of any
successful film. When hollywood tries to develop characters,
they end up moving away from the game's storyline. Anyone
remember Doom? Or Resident Evil? Or silent Hill, ? What about
Wing Commander or Super Mario Brothers? (Didn't want to
think about those two, did you?). Even a cinematic game like
Bioshock has very little actual story.It's all mostly setup (a lot
of really good ideas doesn't add up to a story). Halo is another example of good ideas not making a story. The idea of religious
aliens sounds great, but did you notice that it got lost in the
storyline? You could substitute the Covenant for Klingons or
Imperial Forces or Daleks and the game would have been just
the same. There is only one game that I can think of that MIGHT
make a descent movie: No One Lives Forever. And that one has
such a lengthy story that some parts would have to be cut just
to fit it in to a 2 hour film. A final thought: imagine the cutscenes
from your favorite game taken out and stung together on their
own. How much fun would it really be to sit and watch them?