Girl Cries After Watching Movies: Return of the Jedi, A.I.v
Any fans of the original Star Wars trilogy remember the first time they saw the (real) conclusion of what is arguably the most important trilogy in pop culture history. It was emotional. Ewoks banging on storm trooper helmets like drums, Admiral Ackbar, Landon Calrisian and chewbacca dancing together out of nowhere, that (and I don't care what you have to say) awesome tribal celebratory Ewok song. It's a lot o take in.
But when this guy made his wife watch Return of the Jedi for the first time, she broke out into tears.
The greatest part about her crying about the fact that Anakin Skywalker never got to see his babies with his real eyes and that he died, is that when her husband says that it's okay, she says "It's not okay and I don't think it's funny."
Girl: Is R2D2 put back together?
Husband: Yes, they put him back together.
Girl: But I didn't see him put back together!
Then this guy had the cold heart to show this girl A.I. (Artificial Intelligence)
The first thing she said when she started to cry? "I just thought it was going to be about robots". So did we, star of now-entire-website CryingWife.com, so did we.
Girl Cries Due to In-N-Out Burger-Fueled Happinessv
This woman is clearly on the brink of some kind of emotional breakthrough with her years-long therapist, and she might just have had it while eating a hamburger.
Sure, maybe In N Out Burger is really that good. It's pretty damn good. That's why people were so excited when they opened one (the first one) in Texas. People went nuts.
I mean the guy in the original news report literally camped out to be the first guy in line, and then bought a 3x3 (a burger with three pieces of meat and three pieces of cheese), that's clearly a religious experience. He was excited, even wore an In N Out Burger hat, and everyone was happy. He's a jolly guy.
But then they interviewed this woman sitting outside with a hat, tanktop and welling eyes.
A woman who, for all intents and purposes, is moderately attractive and seems to pass for what most people would call "normal". When asked why In N Out means so much to her, she mentions the taset, but more so about the fact that she hasn't had it for years. She starts talking about what a fast food chain as if it's a long lost relative, which is okay at first.
Then she breaks into tears on what is now national television. Once again, at first you kind of empathize, and even feel for her, she's having a moment. But then she keeps going, and the absurdity of a grown woman crying over a hamburger dawns on you.
3-Year-Old Girl Cries Because She Loves Justin Bieberv
Click the picture below for the original video (which has embedding disabled, but over 22 Million views)
Like the girl from the In N Out Burger video, sometimes people just can't hold the waterworks in when they love something. The crack of a beer bottle cap coming off after a hard day at work, the sound of your child's surprising eloquence at a young age, whenever Jessica Alba bends over, there's really a whole lot in life to be thankful for. And sometimes that's just overwhelming.
This 3-year-old girl found herself overwhelmed one day just at the thought of loving Justin Bieber so much. Something about Justin Bieber touches her in such a profound way, that it led to minutes upon minutes of tears filmed, of course, by her family.
The best part about this video is the interview conducted by her mother.
Why do you cry?
Because I can't see Justin Bieber all day.
Why do you love Justin Bieber?
Because I know he loves me back.
We don't have to cry because we love Justin Bieber...
Yeah we do! Sometimes!
But why are we crying?
Because he makes me cry with his songs.
Why do they make you cry?
Because I just love Justin Bieber.
Honey, you do know you're only 3 years old, right?
Yes I do!
When you're 3 you're not supposed to cry over boys...
But I love Justin Bieber!
What do you want Justin Bieber to do?
I just want him to be one of our family!!!
Do you want to listen to some of his songs, would that you make me feel better?
No, that'll just make me cry again! [Her sister starts singing a Justin Bieber song, girl cries even more]
And at some point, her sister says "if he sees this and comes over, she's gonna be my favorite sister forever".
And hey, what do you know, it actually happened thanks to Jimmy Kimmel. Heartwarming. (This is the heartwarming one.)
Girl Drunk Crying Over "Making It Snow"v
This video is hilarious. It's pretty much known, internet-wide, that she says that she "just wanted to make it snow".
Here's what happened:
So, this girl and her friends go out and get drunk, they went back to their sorority house, they started taking pictures, and they found a fire hydrant. Naturally, what college girls do when really pretty much anything is around, is that they start posing with anything around them. So, they started posing with the fire hydrant.
After a while, the girl starts spraying the fire hydrant everywhere. And, according to her, she was spraying it for a good long while and "felt like a badass" while she was doing it, thus "making it snow".
Turns out the entire sorority had to be evacuated because of the huge mess that she made with the fire hydrant and everyone ended up having to sleep downstairs.
She then retreated to a car with her friend and cried about it, as you will see in this video. The rest is history.
They made her clean the kitchen for a semester and disaffiliated her from the sorority.
She even got a Tosh.0 Web Redemption:
A Girl Cries Because Her Parents Bought Her the Wrong Color Carv
In what has to be one of the most infuriating videos in internet history, some spoiled brat had a birthday (unfortunately). It was her birthday, and it was her party, but in this case, she really didn't have the right to cry if she wanted to.
This is almost heartbreaking for this family that this human being exists. Her brother video tapes it for all of us, just because there's nobody willing to intentionally throw you under the bus as a human being quite like your siblings.
Really, the part that makes it that much sadder, is the fact that the father got this for his daughter and expected it to be a huge moment in her life and in their relationship (and to be fair, it probably was). Right when they unveil the gift that they got her, you hear the father say this, and this is really the saddest part, "you have no idea how hard it was for us to get this".
Her response? "It's RED!"
Wow... Just. Wow. There's nothing I can say that you probably won't leave in the comments after seeing this video.
A Grown Woman Loses It Over American Idol Results
There are fewer things that we love more than making fun of people's reactions to American Idol. This grown woman is the primary reason why. Not only does she go absolutely insane at the results of American Idol 2010, but she has a tantrum about it. And it's not just emotional, it really, really hits deep.
When Ryan Seacrest asks the guy "how does it feel to be the new American Idol" the woman yells at the television, at the top of her lungs, "Like S**T! Because you're an A*****E!".
The greatest quote of the entire video (that is truly worth watching in its entirety) is the grown woman, with children, a husband and a home, saying, about American Idol results "my whole life is ruined!"
BONUS: Group of Girls Mourn David Archuleta's American Idol Loss
Teens Wail Over American Idol Finale - Watch more Funny Videos
The above video of girls reacting to David Archuleta losing American Idol 2008 is funny for three reasons:
1. Some of them are wearing shirts with his face on it.
2. The one girl in the glasses who just sits there crying for a while.
3. The fact that after enough time passes, they get really, really pissed.
Girl Cries Because, According to Her Brother, "She Coulda Had It In the Butt"v
Now, this girl actually did something pretty stupid. She made the same mistake that perverts/pedophiles expect every young girl to make: to trust someone on MySpace.
She apparently met up with someone she wasn't supposed to meet up via MySpace, went out, came back late and her parents had no idea where she was.
Her mom is 100% right in saying that she could've been killed, so she's grounded. Her mom went ahead and called everyone she knew was friends with her daughter, including some dude that's either her boyfriend or some guy she wants to impress.
This is when it gets awesome.
Her brother, who's filming the whole thing (man I wish we had video cameras like this growing up, video taping your siblings getting grounded is a whole other level of greatness in entertainment).
Sure, this guy's jokes about her possibly getting it "in the butt" are really immature, but he sticks with it so long (until she cries) that it ends up being pretty funny. So funny that the mom even ends up laughing about it (again, while she cries).
Wailing Girl Wants Him Dead
American Idol Girl Cryingv
Another American Idol girl, but this time, she's part of the show.
During a horrible, horrible performance of "You Really Got Me" by Sanjaya Malakar, the producers of American Idol decided to cut to a girl in tears and, seemingly, agony.
The only possible explanation to this girl's reaction to his performance is that the people who are paid to hype up the crowd at American Idol concerts were getting desperate.
This girl owns 5 puppies. For every second that she didn't clap for Sanjaya, one of her puppies was being brutally murdered and she was being alerted via text every time it happened. She lost multiple puppies that night, and she will never be the same again.
If you can stomach it, go here for the full video, including Simon's reaction.
12-year-old Girl Cries Crystal Tearsv
So, this is technically a popular crying girl of the internet. Watch the video. It's of a supposed Lebanese "miracle" that was going around for a while where a 12 year old girl is video taped crying "crystals".
People are really ready to believe that there's really a girl who cries crystal tears. I mean, why not? It seems plausible enough if some dude is growing tree limbs somewhere in the world.
The video features a girl with crystals coming out of her eyes. Half the video is spent on the girl "crying", when she doesn't even look sad. I mean, she looks about as sad as any other girl whose father is forcing her to put crystals in her eyes so they can have fifteen minutes of fame, but still not that sad.
The other half is spent proving how sharp the crystals are, showing us how much of a dick her father really is.
Turns out, of course, that this was fake. This girl was never crying crystals, first of all, because she never "cries" in the videos, she just seems to produce them with a smile. This was their first mistake.
Secondly, it's not really biologically possible. And third, someone from Skeptical Inquirer magazine was actually able to reproduce exactly what was happening to the girl.
Hasnah, who claims to produce up to seven crystals a day, showed a collection of the allegedly apported rocks. From their rhomboidal shape and other properties, I recognized them as the natural quartz crystals generally known as "Herkimer diamonds." With the television crew being expected to arrive here the following day, I hastily made some phone calls and soon had acquired a handful of the gemstones.
Although such stones are indeed sharp - and I could see a dark red spot inside the girl's eyelid that probably represented a wound from one of them - I decided to duplicate the effect. All that was necessary was to pull out the lower eyelid to form a pouch and drop in a small crystal so that it rested, only a bit uncomfortably, out of sight. A tug on the lower lid causes the stone to come into view and then pop out of the eye. This I demonstrated at an appropriate time for the television camera, allowing their reporter to actually do the extraction himself. The effect was indistinguishable from the Lebanese "miracle."
Do you believe in the girl crying crystal tears?
Fan Girl Cries During New Moon Trailerv
Yes, that says fan girl, I'm not that mean.
There are a huge amount of geeks in this world, but by far the most annoying is the Twilight geek, or the "Twihard" or more commonly known as the "Twitard".
This girl decided to make a reaction video to the New Moon trailer and, you've really got to hand it to her. This girl warns you not to "bitch" if you hear her squeal. She gets pretty illogical before watching it, she's so excited. She says "I almost don't want to watch it, so that I can just watch it later".
She ends up squealing, just like she warned us she would: "The Beach! The ????!"
Throughout the rest of the video she gets emotional and starts crying because of how much she loves everyone in the movie and the fact that she's met them.
"Oh that is one hell of an ass shot" she says, and you can clearly tell what team she's on as she yells at the trailer as if she hasn't read the books "you dickhead! Don't you dare leave her you dickhead!"
Emo Girl Cries Over the Newsv
This girl is ready to kick your ass.
She's ready to say anything and everything she wants to people who discriminate against "Emo" people, which was kind of an issue when this was new in 2007. Yes, that's right, people cared so much about the dumbass haircuts that go along with being an "Emo" or "Scene" kid, that people were getting their asses kicked. After U.S. reports and even Mexican reports of discrimination against "Emo" kids, this girl decided people had to hear what she had to say.
She considers the whole "Emo" thing a movement, when it's really just, you know, teen angst. Well, teen angst that revolves around bands twice their age that still can't let go of that chick who wouldn't bang them in high school most likely because they hated themselves that much.
Aaanyway, this girl wants to prove one point: that emo kids aren't just a bunch of cry babies and that they'll fight back, and she to a certain degree accomplishes that... until she cries at about 3:30.
Girl Cries For Mommy While Being Arrestedv
So, this is the internet. We've all seen our fair share of police brutality videos, and we've all seen our fair share of arrest videos. It's never that entertaining and it's really never that fun to see someone in one of the worst moments of their lives (okay, yes it is).
This girl shoplifted, which really isn't that big of a deal. Not big enough to get arrested... unless you shoplift a certain amount of money's worth of merchandise. That means that this girl actually stole quite a bit of stuff, or one really, really valuable sweater (worth at least over $50).
But this girl, whose video went viral a few years ago resists arrest and pulls to try to stand up and really makes everyone's life a living hell.
She screams, kicks and acts like she's really not done anything wrong (when clearly, she has) asking for her mom and acting like she's the victim.
Maybe she just shouldn't have shoplifted that awesome white sweater? Just a thought.
L The List