The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs Anything

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The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs

Rachel Stewart Rachel Stewart Power
Ranker 231,414 views 13 items
There are a lot of relatively sound religious rules to live by, according to some old books, but when it comes to sex the rules aren't only endless, they're ridiculous and sometimes completely absurd. From curbing sexual impulses for your own spouse, to God-sanctioned one-night stands, to an afterlife of virgin-filled orgies, here are the top thirteen weirdest religious sex rules and beliefs courtesy of the biggest religions on Earth. Believe it or not but nothing about dry humping is on this list.
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  1. 6

    Wicca: Sex as the Great Rite

    Basically, sex to Wiccans is the religious equivalent of if you did your taxes way ahead of time and even included that contracting job you did. It's the most sacred thing ever. Which makes me question my own belief systems now...

    In the Wiccan tradition, the Great Rite is a spiritual and symbolic connection between the high priest and high priestess. Basically it would be like if Priests HAD to have sex with an alterperson (of age, of course) in front of everyone just to properly execute the day's prayers.

    Awesome.

    This "Great Rite" is acted out by either having physical intercourse or a symbolic kind of intercourse that involves piercing a knife into a chalice filled with wine. It actually sounds like it would be a lot less wasteful to go the good old fashioned way and just do it in front of everyone. But who knows, some people just enjoy stabbing stuff.

    In Wiccan doctrine, the Great Rite also represents the creation of the world, which makes the ritual even more sacred and important, which also makes Wicca one of the most sexually healthy religions on Earth.
  2. 7

    Islam: Cheating is Worse Than Murder

    According to the Hadith, "There is nothing which God abhors more than adultery."

    Having sex with someone else's spouse is worse than murder? Or rape? That's one hell of a statement.

    It definitely puts the premise of the movie "Hall Pass", and probably the movie itself, as one of the most heinous and sacrilegious plots to any movie ever made.

    Seriously, this movie (in any heavily Muslim-powered countries) will probably not only get banned, but protested.

    If the Westboro Baptist Church protested The Da Vinci Code's premiere, their Muslim equivalent should probably also be at the premiere of Hall Pass.
  3. 8

    Judaism: Sex May Not Be Used as a Weapon

    Okay, so this one's less weird and more absolutely freaking awesome.

    Judaism is a more sexually liberal religion than many of its counterparts, including Catholicism, Christianity, and Islam. It definitely takes the prize in that not only does it have some pretty liberal rules about doing it, but you also have rules that actually cater to sexual health in loving relationships (weird, right?)

    According to Jewish law, sex may never be used as a weapon against a spouse, either by depriving the spouse of sex or by compelling it. It is a serious offense to use sex (or lack thereof) to punish or manipulate a spouse.

    *Jewish men everywhere rejoice*
  4. 9

    Catholicism: Having Sex with Your Wife Can Be Adulterous

    Oh holy good lord baby Jesus.

    Pope John Paul II urged husbands "not to commit adultery with their wives by desiring sex for its mere pleasure and the satisfaction of instinct" (Modras: 124, of 1980).

    We weren't exactly expecting a sex positive response, but isn't it a tad over the top, and well, you know, WRONG to say that sex with your wife could even possibly be adulterous? The argument is that having sex for pleasure, rather than procreation, is against Church doctrine, but how on earth is that adulterous? Here's the definition of adultery, according to the Oxford dictionary, just so we're clear: (noun) voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and a person who is not his or her spouse.

    Interesting how this has nothing to do with sleeping with your wife. Just goes to show how solid everyone's reading of The Bible is (including those who define the words derived from it that we use every day.)
  5. 10

    Islam: Absolutely No Sex During the Daytime from August 1st-30th, 2011

    Okay, this is pretty specific.

    But what about the afternoon delights we all know and love?

    In the Islamic tradition, August 1-30th is the Ramadan, the Islamic fasting period that is supposed to teach subscribers to the religion the virtues of faith, humility, and spirituality. Muslims fast, abstain from sex, and don't drink anything from dawn until sunset for the entire 9th month of the Islamic calendar. But sex immediately after sundown is okay.

    This means that if you have any devout Muslim friends who you're going to see in August, the best time to bring up some bad news probably isn't during the day.

    This rule would actually settle quite a few disputes in quite a few different households where women are generally fans of morning sex, but guys like the night sex because they can just pass out afterward instead of, you know, "start their day."

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  1. foodmanchew
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 2/06/2013 2:30 PM
    Well this thing about weirdest religious sex beliefs changes a lot.
  2. Mike
    Islam: Absolutely No Sex During the Daytime from August 1st-30th, 2011 at 5/04/2012 8:47 PM
    Ramadan is not a fixed date in August - it is a specific month in the lunar calendar as used by Islam and thus revolves around the Solar calendar (the Jewish Lunar calendar has an adjustment month to keep it more in line with the Spring Equinox.
  3. Sarah
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 4/01/2012 12:48 AM
    Maratreanism - http://sites.google.com/site/maratreans/ - has many weird beliefs about sex - just to give one, they believe in group marriage ("enamouration"), i.e. you have a group of three, four, five, people, and everyone in the group is "married" to everyone else. They also believe it is a sin to get married before having had sex (complete opposite of the Christian fundies, who think it's a sin to have sex before you get married)
  4. Arten
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 10/27/2011 11:36 AM
    there is only 3 ways for sex enjoyment: 1-perminant marriage 2-audultary and fornication and masturbation 3-temporary marriage which comes along with all obligations that a husband has for his wife and pregnancy in case. now all youth must chose one of these ways what is your idea?
  5. jingorex
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 5/13/2011 2:45 PM
    why do the rabbi suck on the penis of the little kids?
  6. Moses
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 2/07/2011 2:45 PM
    This is just so wrong. First Ramadan changes every year, so no it is not always August 1-30th. Second Yom Kippur is not always on the same day either. A simple Wikipedia search of Tom Kippur would have given you better information. Really this is just simply ignorant.
  7. Jesus
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 2/07/2011 2:42 PM
    Wow, such incorrect information...the 72 vigins thing isn't even real...that is taken wayyyy out of context and extremly misinterpreted
  8. Bob McBobson
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 2/07/2011 9:45 AM
    OK, you have some bad Wikipedia-based knowledge here, and should probably check a few more sources. Especially about Islam. First, the "72 virgins/wives" thing is taken out of context, particularly because it's better understood as "you get a bunch of servants." "72" was a number used at that time to denote "a lot," (just like we'd say "hundreds"), and technically, houris are servants and not just sextoys. The context is that when you get to heaven, you don't have to labor or lust--all your needs will be taken care of. Second, "temporary marriages" are a weird Shi'a interpretation mainly in the Iranian context. Given that Shi'a make up less than 15% of Muslims worldwide, and many Sunni consider Shi'a to be weirdos anyway, it's not like the entire religion validates this concept. Third, Ramadan isn't just in August; it changes date year by year, because the Islamic calendar (like the Jewish) is lunar, not solar. And there are plenty of religions where you abstain from pleasures of the flesh during holy times. Ramadan is simply a 4-week long holy time (from dawn to dusk). And for variety's sake, just because that d-bag Donahoe says something doesn't mean that it is official Catholic doctrine. All in all, your "weirdest religious sex beliefs" is probably better titled "some idiosyncratic things some people in some religions believe and/or practice, kind of" Moron.
  9. Chan Lynn
    The 13 Weirdest Religious Sex Beliefs at 2/03/2011 9:17 PM
    I like how depending on the level of employment of the Jewish man in the relationship he has a certain quota to meet sexually. If you're part time you'd better be sexin' up the wifey more. If you're full time you can take a breather.
  10. ea19gle
    Wicca: Sex as the Great Rite at 2/02/2011 9:31 AM
    Now if that isn't a good way to keep the Fallocentric world view going. Good going wicca! ;p (I say this as a man, btw.)

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