Wicca: Sex as the Great RiteBasically, sex to Wiccans is the religious equivalent of if you did your taxes way ahead of time and even included that contracting job you did. It's the most sacred thing ever. Which makes me question my own belief systems now...
In the Wiccan tradition, the Great Rite is a spiritual and symbolic connection between the high priest and high priestess. Basically it would be like if Priests HAD to have sex with an alterperson (of age, of course) in front of everyone just to properly execute the day's prayers.
This "Great Rite" is acted out by either having physical intercourse or a symbolic kind of intercourse that involves piercing a knife into a chalice filled with wine. It actually sounds like it would be a lot less wasteful to go the good old fashioned way and just do it in front of everyone. But who knows, some people just enjoy stabbing stuff.
In Wiccan doctrine, the Great Rite also represents the creation of the world, which makes the ritual even more sacred and important, which also makes Wicca one of the most sexually healthy religions on Earth.
Islam: Cheating is Worse Than MurderAccording to the Hadith, "There is nothing which God abhors more than adultery."
Having sex with someone else's spouse is worse than murder? Or rape? That's one hell of a statement.
It definitely puts the premise of the movie "Hall Pass", and probably the movie itself, as one of the most heinous and sacrilegious plots to any movie ever made.
Seriously, this movie (in any heavily Muslim-powered countries) will probably not only get banned, but protested.
If the Westboro Baptist Church protested The Da Vinci Code's premiere, their Muslim equivalent should probably also be at the premiere of Hall Pass.
Judaism: Sex May Not Be Used as a WeaponOkay, so this one's less weird and more absolutely freaking awesome.
Judaism is a more sexually liberal religion than many of its counterparts, including Catholicism, Christianity, and Islam. It definitely takes the prize in that not only does it have some pretty liberal rules about doing it, but you also have rules that actually cater to sexual health in loving relationships (weird, right?)
According to Jewish law, sex may never be used as a weapon against a spouse, either by depriving the spouse of sex or by compelling it. It is a serious offense to use sex (or lack thereof) to punish or manipulate a spouse.
*Jewish men everywhere rejoice*
Catholicism: Having Sex with Your Wife Can Be AdulterousOh holy good lord baby Jesus.
Pope John Paul II urged husbands "not to commit adultery with their wives by desiring sex for its mere pleasure and the satisfaction of instinct" (Modras: 124, of 1980).
We weren't exactly expecting a sex positive response, but isn't it a tad over the top, and well, you know, WRONG to say that sex with your wife could even possibly be adulterous? The argument is that having sex for pleasure, rather than procreation, is against Church doctrine, but how on earth is that adulterous? Here's the definition of adultery, according to the Oxford dictionary, just so we're clear: (noun) voluntary sexual intercourse between a married person and a person who is not his or her spouse.
Interesting how this has nothing to do with sleeping with your wife. Just goes to show how solid everyone's reading of The Bible is (including those who define the words derived from it that we use every day.)
Islam: Absolutely No Sex During the Daytime from August 1st-30th, 2011Okay, this is pretty specific.
But what about the afternoon delights we all know and love?
In the Islamic tradition, August 1-30th is the Ramadan, the Islamic fasting period that is supposed to teach subscribers to the religion the virtues of faith, humility, and spirituality. Muslims fast, abstain from sex, and don't drink anything from dawn until sunset for the entire 9th month of the Islamic calendar. But sex immediately after sundown is okay.
This means that if you have any devout Muslim friends who you're going to see in August, the best time to bring up some bad news probably isn't during the day.
This rule would actually settle quite a few disputes in quite a few different households where women are generally fans of morning sex, but guys like the night sex because they can just pass out afterward instead of, you know, "start their day."
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