The world is fiilled with millions of insane people and sometimes, they're women. And on even rarer occasions, they're naked. So here, in one place (and in no particular order), are the eighteen craziest naked women who've hit the news in recent memory. All of these are insane news stories and all of them star a naked woman who's completely lost her marbles (and clothes.)
Woman Caught Running Naked With Boyfriend After Losing at Strip Poker
Hey, rules are rules.
Portsmouth police caught a naked woman and her boyfriend running naked down the street on the early morning of May 19, 2010. Upon further investigation, after cornering the couple behind a fence, the cops were able to glean that the two were the unfortunate losers of a strip poker match at a friend's apartment.
As if that weren't embarrassing enough, the officers drove the couple back to said apartment for further questioning...and to grab their clothes. Upon arrival, they confirmed the streakers' story by walking in on several people playing poker sans-shirts. The girlfriend and her lover were issued verbal warnings and let off the hook.
An intruder broke into Latoya Harkless's home in Texas City after she had just gotten out of the shower. Hearing the break-in, she quickly hid and prepared for battle.
She saw the tentativeness of the intruder, who was holding his gun close to his stomach, and described him as "more scared than me." Harkless jumped out and karate-chopped the gun from his hand, picked it up, and shot at him. They played "cat-and-mouse" for a few minutes, and then Harkless finally lost sight of him and he got away.
In the ensuing trial, it was found that Harkless's shot went directly into the intruder's leg.
That's one tough naked chick and one awesome way for her to realize her superpower: if she's always naked, she can fight crime effectively.
Kathleen "KC" Neill was arrested for posing nude in New York's Metropolitan Museum of Art on September 2, 2009. She is a model, and was posing for photographer Zach Hyman in the museum, for what appears to be a publicity stunt, given Hyman's increased popularity thereafter.
Hyman is known for doing a series of nude shots of his models around New York, most famously on a subway train. This marked the first time any of his models had gotten arrested.
Attorneys for the model found it ridiculous because of the amount of nude art that exists at The Met, and deem that the woman's behavior was 100% fitting of her environment as it was not pornographic in the least.
Naked Woman Flees From Police in Texas, Vigilantes Get Involved
In Baytown, TX, a naked woman in an SUV led cops on a high-speed chase. She was chased by three cars- one officer in a marked cruiser, one off-duty officer in his personal pickup and a vigilante, yes, you read that correctly, a vigilante, as in a person who decided to take the law into their own hands, in his pickup.
This guy actually tries to box this naked woman in with an off-duty cop on the free way.
After a long chase, she was finally arrested in a residential neighborhood in her birthday suit.
Watch this video for the full, unadulterated and, unfortunately, censored glory.
Police received a call about a 25 year old naked woman who was suspected to be on methamphetamines in Bremerton, WA. She was apparently telling people that she was in desperate need of an "electrical shock".
Officers found her wearing only a bra and a "piece of green clothing" wrapped around her stomach. She had an electrical cord with a plug around her right leg. Police were unsure if she'd plugged it into to an electrical outlet or not.
She also walked into someone's home completely uninvited.
When cops attempted to take her pipe away from her, she attacked, biting one of them on the arm, taking all of her clothes off.
A struggle ensued, one of the officers punched her in the face, and then she was pepper sprayed and then detained.
In Covington, a smoking hot woman named Jennifer Gille got in a cab and asked to go to Harrison Avenue. Everything was fine until the ride was over and she was asked to exit the cab.
That's when things started getting hot. Gille began taking off her clothes, asking to be driven to a different destination. The driver somehow continued to ask her to get out of the car, and when she refused, drove to the local police station for assistance. While he was inside requesting said assistance, Gille hopped in the front seat and sped the h**l out of there. She was later found a block away laying naked in the backseat, and needed to be clothed by officers.
Gille was charged with unauthorized use of a vehicle and obscenity.
Another, Less Crazy, Naked Woman Falls Through a Roof
A naked couple in Aberdeen, UK were having sex on the top of a roof, as reported by witnesses.
The couple was in their mid twenties and were just experimenting with new places to have sex, not quite taking into account the weight/force of their thrust.
Then, all of a sudden, the girl fell through the roof, prompting a full-scale rescue effort. To make matters worse, a worker at the building was quoted as saying the roof she fell through was full of asbestos.
Emergency medical services did "asbestos" they could to help her, and she was confirmed to be ok afterwards.
Naked Sorceress Falls Through Ceiling Onto Sleeping Children
Al-Seeh authorities received a call about an "African sorceress," and ventured out to investigate.
When they arrived at her house, the officials found her completely naked. They were embarrassed about entering the home of a stark naked woman, so they walked out and gave her time to clothe herself.
Meanwhile, she took her chance to escape, jumping out her window to her neighbor's roof, only to crash through the ceiling and land on the floor next to a bed of sleeping children.
No one was injured, except the children's innocence, her pride, and humanity in general.
Naked Woman Steals Police Car, Tries to Escape Via Fence
What is it with naked women in Utah?
This story, from West Valley City, Utah, describes a woman who stole a police cruiser, and then proceeded to lead cops on a high-speed chase through West Jordan.
When confronted on foot by two officers, she charged at them, slipped through them, and attempted to climb a chain-link fence. A quick stun-gun shot from one of the cops brought her down. She was then sent to have a mental evaluation.
A Los Angeles woman driving nude managed to pilot her pickup truck directly (and painfully ironically) into a driving school. Witnesses say the woman sped through an intersection, then crashed through a fence and into a shopping mall, before plowing head-on into a driving school storefront. Witness accounts say a naked woman with visible injuries staggered out of the truck and collapsed.
What makes the story even more interesting is that there was a man riding in the bed of the truck who had stopped to help her, as she seems to have been fleeing some rapist-attackers that were hot on her trail.
On October 13, 2010, two Portland, Oregon police officers were called to an apartment complex to deal with a naked woman who was outdoors yelling obscenities. When they arrived, 61 year-old Phyllis Ann Lasich had pushed the screen out of her second-story window, began talking to them, and seemed calm. She thanked them for their concern and haste in dealing with the call, but assured them that everything was fine.
The two cops decided everything was okay, and turned to leave, but then they heard a sharp crashing sound from the apartment. They turned to see Lasich standing there threatening them with a meat cleaver.
She came at the officers, swinging the instrument, but upon some orders from the gun-brandishing cops, agreed to comply by laying on the ground.
Lasich wasn't charged for the incident but was forced to undergo a mental evaluation, most likely due to the fact that she uttered the creepiest words I've ever heard in a news story when she was arrested: "Thank God you are here! They've been coming to kill me all day!"
Naked, Bleeding Woman Arrested for Aggravated Assault
35 year-old Jewel Pearl Rogers was arrested in Myrtle Beach, SC when she was found naked and bleeding from a large gash in her back.
After an investigation, police found that Rogers had chucked a drinking glass at her husband's head and injured him after he told her to come inside and get dressed before leaving the house.
Rogers was severely inebriated, and obviously takes slight fashion criticism extremely seriously.
34 year-old Holly Kay Highfield was drunk when she deliberately drove her Honda into a bicyclist, severely injuring her (the cyclist).
Before they got there, though, not only did she run someone over intentionally, but she actually got out of her car, still naked, crawled into the backseat of another car that belonged to someone who'd pulled over to help the bicyclist until that person had to pull her out using force.
After this, she managed to not only stop another car, but pull them out of their driver's seat, Grand Theft Auto style, and then drove that third car into her original Honda.
It took several officers to detain her.
She was arrested on aggravated battery and use of a deadly weapon, DUI, and for causing damage to property, as well as common sense.
NY Woman Drives High, Naked, Accidentally Kills a D.A.
24 year-old Taliyah Taylor was going for a joyride in Staten Island while ripped on drugs, and, of course, naked.
Her Nissan careened into a 41 year-old district attorney, killing him instantly and rocketing him into electrical wires above. How fast must she have been going to knock him that high in the air? High people always do love company, though...
Taylor was arrested after being pulled from her car by local hardware store workers. Here's to hoping they "nailed" her with manslaughter charges.
Idaho police arrested Catherine Carlson, 52, in July 2010 for suspicion of use of weapons of mass destruction, arson and indecent exposure. This one gets kind of weird...
According to Carlson's story, she was upset about police using her birth name on a 2007 traffic citation instead of her chosen name that she had legally changed in 1980.
Her birth name? Daniel Carlson. That's right, Catherine had a sex change.
So what happened was, Idaho citizens reported a naked woman running down Highway 95 clutching what appeared to be a pipe bomb in her hand. She'd apparently torched her car (most likely for insurance purposes) and then ran away from it, naked, on a highway.
Upon her arrest, however, it was discovered that this pipe contained only legal documents bearing her birth name, and not any actual explosives.
They did, however, find what appeared to be pipe bombs in her trailer home.
Drunk Naked Woman Beats Husband, Breaks Into Middle School
In Charlotte, North Carolina police who responded to a triggered burglary alarm in a middle school happened upon a 58 year-old, fully intoxicated naked woman who was barely awake. Police say she broke a window to get in, although later could not tell them her motives behind doing so.
She'd been driving around with her husband when they pulled over in front of a school (most likely to get down and dirty.) Things went awry, though, when they got into a heated fight, she punched him in the face, breaking his nose, and injuring his eye. She ran out of the car then, and broke in the middle school, setting off all kinds of alarms.
She was booked on breaking and entering, as well as assault for an incident which occurred prior to her break-in.
This one's not so hot (which actually, disappointingly, goes for almost all of these cases).
People walked in on a 54 year-old woman in a Latter-Day Saints church performing a lewd act in West Jordan, Utah. One of these people who saw her was a child, officials said, so they booked her for Lewd Acts Involving a Child, which is a misdemeanor.
Weirdest part? She refused to put her clothes back on when told to.
I guess when your husband has 8 other wives, you're gonna have to take care of business yourself once in awhile.
FuckME The 18 Craziest Naked Women In News Report History at 11/10/2011 5:22 AM
OMG. Why do crazy ass people run around naked. My lord! This is practicaly like taking your 5 year old to a srip club! What if she saw that kind of $hit!
cuthbert Police Confront Cleaver-Wielding Topless Woman at 8/08/2011 3:31 AM
While the wielding of a cleaver and threatening cops is illegal, in Portland, being topless is legal. With a couple provisions, which actually might apply to this case.
Hey, rules are rules.
Only in Texas (and in action movies).
Kathleen "KC" Neill was arrested for posing nude in New York's Metropolitan Museum of Art on September 2, 2009. She is a model, and was posing for photographer Zach Hyman in the museum, for what appears to be a publicity stunt, given Hyman's increased popularity thereafter.
Police received a call about a 25 year old naked woman who was suspected to be on methamphetamines in Bremerton, WA. She was apparently telling people that she was in desperate need of an "electrical shock".
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Naked Woman Arrested for Lewd Act in LDS Church at 11/30/2010 7:41 AM
The 18 Craziest Naked Women In News Report History at 11/10/2011 5:22 AM
Naked Woman Flees From Police in Texas, Vigilantes Get Involved at 11/29/2010 6:49 PM
The 18 Craziest Naked Women In News Report History at 12/01/2010 1:13 AM
Naked Woman Arrested for Lewd Act in LDS Church at 11/29/2010 5:06 PM
-a mormon
Police Confront Cleaver-Wielding Topless Woman at 8/08/2011 3:31 AM
Woman Arrested for Posing Naked in NY Museum at 1/22/2012 1:52 PM
Naked Woman Arrested for Lewd Act in LDS Church at 11/27/2011 2:49 PM