Three People Fight to the Death in Karaoke Dispute"Ugh, I swear to god, if I hear one more person sing Journey tonight, I am gonna kill someone."
Next up on the mic is Barry with "Don't Stop Believing"!
"Oh, that's it, I'ma stab a bitch."
Stabbing someone for a poor choice at karaoke? Too much? Not in Xi'an China.
On Qixi, the Chinese Valentine's Day, a noodle shop owned by a man called Mr. Yun was the site of a double murder over control of the microphone in what was intended to be a light-hearted night of crooning with his family.
Yun's 4-year-old son was on the stage, belting out tunes and refusing to give the other attendees a turn to sing. Yun was indulging the child, who the other party-goers were calling a "little emperor" (a reference to Chinese parents' special attention to the one child they're allowed to have per Chinese law) and getting increasingly agitated with the situation.
Rather than gong him off the stage, which many of the finer American karaoke bars will do when a patron is insufferable, two of the young boy's uncles attacked Yun, kicking him mercilessly until he was on the ground, unable to fight them off.
In the midst of the fracas Yun's nephew, who worked at the shop, picked up not the mic, but A MEAT CLEAVER and hacked the two men attacking his uncle to death.
Next time maybe the rest of the family will be smart enough to just walk across the street and rent a booth when the "little emperor" of the family can't sing enough Bieber.
Source: The Telegraph
Man Cooked to Death at Bumble Bee Tuna FactoryJose Melena had been working at the Bumble Bee Tuna plant in Santa Fe Springs, CA for six years when his on-the-job satisfaction took a monumental turn for the worse one afternoon in October.
Melena's job at the seafood processing plant was to load baskets of canned product into the pressure cooker and remove them with a pallet jack when they had finished processing. At some point during the transfer process, Melena became trapped in the container and was cooked to death.
Upon discovering Melena was in the steamer machine, emergency personnel were summoned, but the man could not be saved.
Man Shot Dead Trying to Cure Hiccups
Known ways to cure the hiccups: holding breath, drinking a glass of water, punching the afflicted person in the stomach, shooting the afflicted in the face.
Wait, that last one sounds a little extreme; does it really work? As a matter of fact, it does (mostly because getting shot in the face kills you, but maybe it also really freaks you out and cure the hiccups before you die).
Sadly, Pfc Isaac Lawrence Young was the unwitting guinea pig for that “shot in the face” theory recently when a fellow soldier stationed at Ft. Hood in Texas pulled out a gun, just to scare the hiccups away, and ended up discharging the weapon in the general direction of Young’s face.
The incident went down in the men’s living room where they, and a third soldier, were watching Sunday night football and drinking. Pfc. Patrick Edward Myers, who was probably a little overly-excited after seeing both Texas teams win their games earlier in the day, took out a handgun to help Young triumph over his temporary affliction, but ended up killing him before he could be transported to a nearby field where a helicopter was waiting to take him to a trauma hospital.
Myers is currently awaiting trial for manslaughter.
Man is Killed, Dismembered, and Sent to Local SchoolsWhen Jun Lin said he wanted to go back to school, he probably didn't envision it this way.Lin, a Chinese university student, was murdered and dismembered by adult film actor Luka Magnotta (his reported lover), who sent boxes containing different parts of Lin to politicians in Ottawa and to two schools in Vancouver.The body parts were put together with Lin's murder when police found his severed head in a Montreal Park.Magnotta fled from Canada after the murders, but he was picked up in an internet cafe in Berlin, Germany where he was Googling articles about himself.Source: CNN
Woman's Kung Fu Grip to Blame in Testicle-Related DeathSince the following death occurred in China's haiku city, here are three lines about this man's death:No, you can't park hereHey, those are my balls. Hands offGrip like vice, I'm deadHere's how it went down: this woman drives into the city to pick her kids up from school and tries to park her scooter (yes, she was going to put multiple children on a scooter. Totes nominated for The 20 Absolute Worst Parents of 2012) in front of a man's shop. The man says no, you can't park here, they fight a little, she calls her brother and husband to join her in the dispute, things escalate further, and when she realizes he's not going to allow the scooter to stay,she grabs the man's testicles and squeezes them until he passes out.The man was taken away by ambulance but later died in the hospital.Source: Huffington Post
Man Tweets YOLO to Drunk Driving, Dies in CrashNow, we all know that when looking for a credible, reliable source on topics like life and philosophy, we should turn to the nearest rapper and ask his advice. If you had asked aspiring rapper Ervin McKinness for his advice on the topic of driving while drunk, he would have told you “Definitely a bad idea, son. Designated drivers are your keys to big pimpin’”.
Ok, he would never have said that. Had you Tweeted that same question to him, though, you would have seen this take on the topic:
You had half a bottle of Henny and you have to get across town? #F**kIt, son! What’s the worst that could happen drifting 120 MPH around corners?
Oh, right. Death. Death could happen.
McKinness, known as Jew'elz and Inkyy in the music community that had recently awarded him a recording deal, never got a chance to make any music professionally because 21 minutes after he said “f**k it” to driving drunk, the SUV he was in skidded into a wall and killed all five of the car’s occupants, including the would-be rapper.
Maybe YOLTM (You Only Live Twenty Minutes) would have been a more appropriate hashtag?
Man Dies After Live Cockroach Eating ContestIf you're Bear Grylls and you're in some rain forest trying to survive on nothing but the land and your own recycled piss, maybe eating some live cockroaches isn't such a bad idea. If you're some random guy in Miami, though, not so much.Edward Archbold was 32 when he decided to enter a pet store's live bug eating competition. On the menu for the contest: worms and live cockroaches. Archbold bested about 30 other contestants and won the competition's grand prize, a python.Sadly, the roaches were apparently not satisfied to be the only ones losing their life in this bizarre contest, and wreaked some kind of havoc in Archbold's stomach. While all of the other contestants went seemingly unaffected by the ingestion of the strange contest fare, the winner collapsed in front of the store and could not be revived at the hospital.Maybe next time, if people are thinking about having a contest involving eating foods that will survive a nuclear holocaust, they'll choose Twinkies instead.Source: Yahoo!
Hair Extensions Kill WomanNext time you're getting ready to go out to the club for the night, remember this very important wardrobe fact:Picking the wrong accessories could kill you.34-year-old Atasha Graham went out for a night of dancing in London at the club her boyfriend DJ'ed at. She had some drinks, got on the dance floor, and got her groove on. Several hours in, Graham was sweating up a storm, but still carrying on until she collapsed out of the blue in the middle of the floor. She hadn't had too much to drink, wasn't in bad health, so what was it that did her in?Her hair extensions.All attempts to revive Graham failed and she was pronounced dead shortly after collapsing in the club, prompting an autopsy that revealed latex glue from her hair extensions had seeped into the woman's scalp, causing a reaction that led to her death. As if that's not shocking enough, the doctor that performed the autopsy said there are 10-20 deaths of this nature in the UK every year, and many more in America.So next time you go out dancing, unless you're trying to attract some real freaks, maybe leave the hair extensions at home.Source: Voice UK
Three Drown in Manure Filled Septic PitWhat a sh*tty way to die. Literally.
Glen Nolt and his two sons, Kelvin and Cleason, were out seeking to procure some fertilizer for their farm when their mission ran afoul at the site of giant manure pit on a Maryland dairy farm. It's unclear exactly what happened, but the story that was pieced together in the aftermath goes something like this:
The men were out to suck some manure from this pit for their own pit. When one of the three was setting a pumping device in the giant vat, he unexpectedly fell in. The other two rushed to the rescue, became trapped in the vat themselves, and were unable to escape. The three drowned a giant vat of poop. No sh*t, true story. This actually happened.
So next time you're having a crappy day, you can think how much better you have it than the Nolts.
Source: Huffington Post
Man Dies After Being Fused with Chair for Two YearsIt's hard to say what's worst about the case of an Ohio man who sat in the same chair for two years without moving: that he had two roommates who lived with him, fed him daily, and allowed him to be completely sedentary in their home, or that after two years of sitting in the same chair, the man became fused to the fabric of the seat- which was covered in his own urine and feces- to the point of maggots sprouting around the guy before he was dead.The absurd living situation was exposed one day when one of the roommates, who happened to be the man's GIRLFRIEND, came home to find the man unconscious. When officers arrived, they found the man in deplorable conditions and had him immediately transported to the hospital, where he later died. One of the officers who responded to the call was so disgusted by the scene that he had to dispose of his uniform after helping the man from the house.Source: Fox News
Bath Salts Zombie Guy (He's Dead Now)What can't be said about the bath salts zombie guy that wasn't said by thousands of Halloween costumes this year?
Rudy Eugene, a homeless man living in Miami, is thought to have gotten hopped up on bath salts - a drug that makes you act like you're on mixture of cocaine, meth, and LSD - before assaulting another homeless man and eating 80% OF HIS FACE.Nobody knows for sure what compelled Eugene to take these actions, because police, fearing an impending zombie apocalypse, shot Eugene dead when he resisted arrest after being pulled from his victim, who survived the incident.Dr. Howard Mell, who works at an ER in Ohio, wanted to make sure people didn't go into a panic and start shooting mom while she was in the tub, fearing that she could become a zombie at any minute. Said the doctor, "these are not the bath salts you buy at Victoria Secret...there's not soap in them"."Damn," said every teenager who wanted a reason not to take out the trash that night.Source: US News
Clothes Caught in Escalator Strangles WomanThey're true. Your fears your entire life have been true. This can happen to any of us and nobody is safe. Stop sleeping or feeling comfortable because there's a woman who died in 2012 from getting her clothes stuck in an escalator.
Lindenhurst, New York. An 88 year-old woman named Irene Bernatzky died after falling on an escalator and getting her clothes caught in the teeth of it. Her clothes, then, were what asphyxiated her.
Source: CBS News
Woman Killed by Cannon FireThings nobody worries about dying from since the turn of the 20th century:
PolioGeetting run over by a horse-drawn carriageThe PlagueDragonsCannon fire
Oh, wait. Cannon fire: back on the list.
Here's 38-year-old Jeannette Fay Ogara, hanging out in a trailer park in a town outside of San Diego near the US-Mexico border, chilling with some friends in her mobile home while her boyfriend, Richard Fox, gets drunk with a buddy outside while playing with fireworks. Winning combo.
Little does Ogara know that the boyfriend is dumping the gunpowder from the fireworks into a homemade cannon. A cannon. Yes, Uzis and flamethrowers be damned, this special guy was on a mountainside building a weapon that enjoyed its heyday in the US during the Civil War.
When construction of the cannon had finished, Fox lit the device, which immediately exploded, sending a cannon ball and large pieces of shrapnel rocketing through the sides of the trailer, right through his girlfriend, killing her almost instantly.
The boyfriend was treated at a local hospital before being taken into police custody. Several adults and a 4-year-old child who were also in the mobile home when the cannon went off went unharmed.
Source: NBC San Diego
Man Dressed as Bigfoot Struck and Killed by Two CarsIf we've learned anything from South Park, it's to shoot anything that's coming right for you.
In the absence of a gun, however, I'm sure that Uncle Jimbo would give the thumbs up to taking out a giant, hairy, Sasquatch creature with your car. Would he feel bad instructing you to do this if he found out the Bigfoot you hit was actually a guy dressed in military grade camouflage? 50/50.
Randy Lee Tenley, a 44-year-old from Kalispell, MT was out on the highway trying to create a Bigfoot scare when he wandered onto the road and was struck by a teenage driver who could not swerve quickly enough to avoid the man-beast.
After being struck by the first driver, he was then run over by another and did not survive to make an attempt to sell his "real Bigfoot" footage to the National Enquirer.
74-Year-Old Chokes on Dentures While Having Sex With HookerEverybody has urges. Candy, video games, sex. Well, it's safe to say that many people grow out of those types of urges at some age or another, but not Chen, a Taiwanese man who ran into some troubles after 30 minutes of sexy time with a 62-year-old hooker he'd been living with.
To clarify, it wasn't the sex that killed Chen. Lots of guys die having sex, mostly from heart attacks brought on by exertion. Not the worst way to die if you have to pick. This man, however, died AFTER finishing his romp, after he plopped back on the bed, dislodged his dentures, and started choking on them.
After efforts to revive the man failed, his companion called the paramedics, but it was too late. Chen had already died from after-erotic asphyxiation.
Three Women Killed and Baked Into EmpanadasEver been to South America and thought: "Yum, street food! I'm going to try the local fare"? If you were travelling the streets of Pernambuco, Brazil, you may have been eating people. Not Soylent Green, straight-up people.That's Jorge Beltrao Negromonte, 50, and his wife Isabel Pires, 51, who are accused (along with his 25-year-old mistress) of luring AT LEAST three women to their house with the promise of nanny work only to slit the women's throats, behead them, and quarter their bodies for, wait for it....Cooking for human consumption.These Brazilian gourmands are said to have baked their victims into empanadas (small meat pies) and sold them on the streets for about $.50 each. Street food in South America is typically less expensive than say, New York, but for half a dollar, perhaps their patrons should have been a little sketched out about what these Sweeney Todd wannabes were peddling.Source: The Sun
Scooter Rider Buried by Boiling Tar After Cutting Off TruckThere are certain things most two-wheeled motorists look out for: cigarette butts, squirrels, pedestrians, errant lane changes...trucks full of boiling tar, not so much.
In Yuhuan, Shejiang China, a moped rider was driving recklessly and cut off a truck carrying 10 tons of boiling, causing the driver to swerve suddenly to avoid the motorist.
Yang Fu, the driver, said he made every attempt to avoid the scooter, but ended up turning the truck over, covering the man and his scooter in a pile of tar kept at over 100 degrees when being transported.
The paramedics said the rider never stood a chance and probably only made it a minute before succumbing to the heat and weight of the tar before dying on the scene.
Source: Daily Mail
College Student Dies After Thanking God for Another Year of LifeIn what should be referred to as “The Tebow Syndrome”, Arianne Noelle Patterson, a student at North Carolina’s Gardner-Webb University, got an unexpected gift from God for her big 2-1.
Patterson- who should have been smote just for spending her time tweeting in class she was probably paying thousands of dollars to take – got down on one knee and celebrated her 21st birthday by saying “Thank you God for another year of life.” to all her followers in the Twitterverse.
And then she dropped dead from a heart attack. In the middle of her religion class.
That’ll teach you to thank people for giving you stuff you didn’t want in the first place. Like your heart attack…
Shots Fired to Celebrate Wedding Down a Power Line, Kills 23If you live in Saudi Arabia, it's probably not that uncommon to hear gunfire, let alone be the one doing the shooting. And it's not limited to war zones, either: in the Arab country, it's very commonplace for party-goers to discharge their weapons in celebration - as was the case at a wedding celebration in Riyadh, where things went from joyous to morose in one shot.
While shooting weapons in the air post-wedding, one of the bullets took down a power line which hit the top of a tent, setting off a blaze and trapping the people inside.
Sadly, as is common in the culture, the men are generally separated from the women and children at these types of celebrations, and all of the attendees in the tent were women or children. All 23 of them.
Source: Mercury News
Man Suffocates Under 20 Pounds of Pinto BeansBeans, beans, the musical fruit. The more you eat, the more you die.
Wait, it's not supposed to go like that, is it? Perhaps not when you're talking about a tin of Pork n Beans, but a 20-foot-tall pile of beans? That's a whole other story.
Raymond Segura, Jr was at work at the Kelley Bean Company one morning in Brush, CO when he magically became covered by several tons of pinto beans. Once someone at the plant realized what was going on, they called for help and a crew of dozens, including several local inmates of the county jail, worked frantically to unearth Segura from the mound.
When they finally got to him, it was too late. He was smothered from the beans.
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