Fat Guy Eats Pizza Rolls to Beat Personal RecordThis guy will be dead in about two weeks from whenever you are reading this. No matter how long he lives or how old he gets, this guy has two weeks to live.
This is a video, that went super viral, and was even featured on Tosh.0 (the year-later Facebook post of cable television), so you know it's important. It's a guy who already weighs so much that his face has just started to look like a mask of some kind (and I'm a pretty heavy guy, so this guy is really a disgrace to my race).
He "challenges" himself to eat a "personal" record of 40 pizza rolls. That's 40. I have a hard time not feeling like I have to wash my face after about 8 of them. This guy eats 40. He accepts "challenges" from his YouTube audience, or as I call them, his executioners, and eats random stuff for them to watch.
If this guy ever gets a girlfriend I'm giving up on life, but dear LORD does heh stick to his guns. He breathes heavy while lifting up a 1 1/2 lb. bag of pizza rolls and is one of those people that runs out of breath while eating meals, but he really can eat A LOT OF FOOD. I don't know if he could give that 6-pack having Japanese competitive eater Kobayashi a run for his money, but I for one would like to see that match up.
This guy rules.
The Guy Who Dropped the Mustard
One of the saddest (look how sad he looks!) and funniest pictures in internet history, this is a viral image that was made popular on Fark in about 2005.
It's originally a still of a guy named Mike "Nug" Nahrgang, a Canadian comedian and actor who's won various awards for being part of a sketch comedy troupe.
He and another actor from his troupe were having a food fight when Nahrang inadvertently covered himself in mustard, someone took a picture and the rest is history.
Fat Guy Shooting a GunThis is a fat guy shooting a tiny gun while firing it in the same way that most of us that know what we're doing like to play Time Crisis or House of the Dead. Your argument is invalid.
The "I Beat Anorexia" GuyOne of the most shared images of a fat man in internet history, this is a guy who really doesn't care about how he's going to have a heart attack by the time he's 50 and could easily be a character in the SNL sketch where a bunch of Chicago Bears fans sit around a table and share stories.
The image is hilarious in of itself, so a tip of the ill-fitting hat to one of the people who's made me laugh hardest on the internet, during my various interweb travels.
The Star Wars KidOne of the first viral video internet memes in history starred a fat guy, a fat kid, actually, playing Star Wars with himself in front of a camera. People made fun of the kid for being such a huge nerd, but then started editing reali lightsabers onto his hands, setting his dances to electronic music and even making it seem like he was doing great moves to avoid laser blasts.
Here's a good compilation of what some people did with his video:
Ah, they early memes. The kid ended up becoming a lawyer and actually lost all the weight:
But while everyone was laughing, since he was the first real person to have any kind of real internet fame, he didn't know that he could use it to become a real-life celebrity yet. So his story is actually kind of a sad one, but has a happy ending.
"Not as many people know the rest of the story: Ghyslain Raza – or to the internet,Star Wars Kid – didn’t feel famous, or funny. He felt harassed, the victim of the most visible bullying in history. Ghyslain dropped out of his Quebec high school, was diagnosed with depression, and checked into a psychiatric ward for children.
Ghyslain and his parents would later sue the families of the three classmates who leaked the video in 2003, for around $250,000. According to the lawsuit, which resulted in a settlement, "Ghyslain had to endure, and still endures today, harassment and derision from his high-school mates and the public at large."
But after eight years of laughs at his expense – and a few campaigns in his defense – Ghyslain is back. Now in his early 20s, he’s reemerged as the president of the Patrimoine Trois-Rivières, a conservation society that aims to preserve the cultural heritage of his hometown of Trois-Rivières.
Revenge of the Sith this isn’t, but he’s putting his litigious experience to some use, getting his law degree at McGill University in Montreal." - Source
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