The 9 Most Hilariously Negative Abduction Reviews By Best Movie Reviews [6 more lists]
The most hilariously negative 'Abduction' reviews pretty much skewer the Taylor Lautner action movie. 'Abduction's' Rotten Tomatoes score has been hovering around the 0 to 5% range. That's out of 100%. Just so we're clear. Yes, Mr. Abs has ditched his Jacob Black 'Twilight' persona and is trying to break out into other roles - but given some of these reviews, it might be better to stick to portraying a shirtless werewolf. Or something. Behold, some of the funniest, worst movie critic's reviews of 'Abduction.' Feel free to vote for your favorites.
'Abduction' stars Taylor Lautner as Nathan Harper, a young man who accidentally discovers his true identity. This discovery puts his life, and the life of his neighbor, Karen (Lily Collins), in grave danger. Nathan and Karen are forced to go on the run, to try and escape government ops who want to eliminate them.
Looking for some more funny bad movie reviews? Check out these lists for bad reviews of 'Bucky Larson: Born to Be a Star,' 'The Smurfs' and 'Zookeeper.' If you want to see some movie quotes that are actually funny see these Dwight Schrute Quotes.
- 1
Kyle Smith, New York Post
Actual abduction may be preferable to the movie of the same name, but only if your kidnappers don't torture you by forcing you to watch it.BUY @ amazon
Kyle Smith of the 'New York Post' is NOT an 'Abduction' fan. At least not of the movie. No, he believes strongly that "actual abduction" would be a better option. He also adds that 'Abduction' star Taylor Lautner "...proves again he has the acting chops of Bert from "Sesame Street." -
- 2
R. Kurt Osenlund, Slant Magazine
Taylor Lautner can't carry a movie any more than Abigail Breslin can carry a refrigerator.BUY @ amazon
Yikes. 'Slant' magazine movie critic R. Kurt Osenlund positively rips 'Abduction' in his review, adding that director John Singleton "...doesn't know he's made one of the funniest films of the year," one that Osenlund believes is "extravagantly clueless." - 3
Glenn Dunks, Trespass Magazine
Lautner isn’t much of an actor and behind his face is a brain ticking away at one kilometre per hour with the repetitive long-held close-ups of his face yielding no more emotional insights than the equally long close-ups of his stomach.BUY @ amazon
Wow. Critic Glenn Dunks of 'Trespass Magazine' is definitely not a Lautner fan. Give points for his abs? I mean aren't the abs worth at least 3-5%? -
- 4
Clem Bastow, The Vine
We may never know if Abduction is satire or misfire, but I spent the entire film wracked by gales of choking laughter.BUY @ amazon
Uh oh. Another critical review indicating that John Singleton's "action thriller" is somehow a comedy. That cannot be good. - 5
Samuel Downing, MovieFix
Two reasons not to go see Abduction: first, every screening is guaranteed to be jam-packed with rabid girls squealing every time its star, Twilight's Taylor Lautner is on screen. Second: it's just not a good movie.BUY @ amazon
Critic Samuel Downing of MovieFix also mentions in his 'Abduction' movie review that the film isn't even "bad in that 'so bad it's good' way."
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The 9 Most Hilariously Negative Abduction Reviews at 9/23/2011 9:12 PM
The 9 Most Hilariously Negative Abduction Reviews at 9/23/2011 9:27 PM