Tom Cruise Jumps on Oprah's Couch
In May of 2005, Tom Cruise declared his love for Katie Holmes in an 'Oprah Winfrey Show' interview that remains one of the most shocking TV appearances in recent memory. Tom was really, really happy to be dating Katie, and in a moment of unbridled enthusiasm, he decided to start jumping on Oprah's couch. Yay, Xenu Katie!
Cruise proposed in June of 2005 and he and Katie married in November of 2006, in a Scientology ceremony held in an Italian castle. Some believe that Katie Holmes was chosen for Cruise by members of the Church of Scientology under the guise of casting auditions. She got the part, and then some.
The moment itself became a rather popular Internet meme at the time and was parodied in a variety of settings. Comedian Dane Cook did an impression of the Cruise appearance on "Jimmy Kimmel Life," the scene was reimagined using the video game "The Sims" and parodied in the film "Scary Movie 4." Katie Holmes even talked about the incident during an appearance to promote "Batman Begins" on David Letterman's show. Perhaps the most famous take on the incident, however, involved Tom Cruise being granted with evil Sith-like powers:
It's Kate, Not Katie
Around the time the couple got together, rumors circulated that Tom - a famously controlling individual - was insisting that his betrothed start going by the name "Kate Cruise" rather than the more familiar Katie Holmes. (After all, she had already starred in some TV under the former name.) Some believe this was a Scientology (read: cult) thing -- changing a member's name in order to symbolically "cut ties" with the person's former life outside of the organization. In various interviews, Cruise often referred to Katie as "Kate."
(You do have to admit, "Kate Cruise" has a certain crispness to it. It seems to say "Hey, Dark Overlord Who Controls the Entire Universe, why not give me a ride on your kickass OT-7-and-above spacecraft sometime?")
It's also interesting to note that in Tom Cruise's official statement about their divorce, he uses "Kate." Holmes' statement clearly reads "Katie."
Suri Cruise's Silent Birth
On April 18, 2006, little Suri Cruise came into the world -- verrrrrrrrrrrry quietly. Katie Holmes reportedly had a "silent birth," in keeping with the principles of Scientology. That means that even when she was in the throws of killer labor pains, she wasn't allowed to scream. (Apparently, Scientologists are a lot like British people this way. "Stiff upper lip, good chap. Keep calm and carry on.")
For months, everyone waited to see photos of Suri. Did she really exist? Was Katie faking the pregnancy, waiting on the aliens to deliver the little bot? And why did Katie have such a prominent baby bump in October 2005 -- when she couldn't have been more than 2-3 months along?
Finally, in September of 2006, TomKat introduced their little one to the world, with a huge photo spread in 'Vanity Fair.' The photos were taken by none other than Annie Leibovitz several months after Suri was born.
Addicted to Scientology?
In January of 2011, 'Star' magazine ran a story claiming that Katie Holmes was "addicted" to Scientology treatments. Specifically, she was hooked on using an "e-meter."
It's all part of Scientology's "counseling" sessions. The e-meter is like a lie detector and the process involves some sort of "low-level" electric charge (see: small shock) that somehow stimulates endorphins and makes you feel all better inside. Anyway, apparently it's addictive and Katie was said to be hooked.
Another satisfied customer!
The 'Star' headline, "Katie Drug Shocker," prompted Holmes to file a $50 million libel lawsuit against the magazine. (That's "KATE DRUG SHOCKER," if you don't mind!) The lawsuit was later settled and 'Star' issued a formal apology to Holmes in May 2011.
TomKat's Strange Charity Dancev
A swanky Hollywood charity event in May of 2010 was the scene of yet another bizarro TomKat moment, when Katie and Tom took the stage to perform a sultry creepy song and dance routine. The whole thing was just super awkward, with Katie running her fingers through Tom's hair as she croons "Whatever Lola Wants" (from 'Damn Yankees') and Tom Cruise hamming it up for everyone as his wife flips her skirt everywhere.
The routine quickly went viral online, and may have paved the way for Cruise's appearance in the rock musical "Rock of Ages" this summer. The awkwardness of the video may also have paved the way for 8 people paying to go SEE the rock musical "Rock of Ages" this summer. But we don't want to kick Tom when he's down. That's Katie's job, apparently.
Tom Cruise Grabs Katie Holmes' Buttv
In August of 2011, Tom and Katie attending Katy Perry's concert in L.A. (sorry, KATE Perry's concert.) Apparently Katy's songs got Tom a bit frisky (ugh, I actually just had the type that you guyz), because he planted his hand on her posterior and gave a little squeeze.
Look, married people do this all the time at concerts, which is why I'm no longer able to truly enjoy Neil Diamond at open-air venues. But what is MOST disturbing here is that Tom kept his hand on Katie's posterior for most of the show.
Say what you want about Katie Holmes and Tom Cruise, but one thing they had going for them was great hair. That being said, in November of 2007, Katie's short, bobbed haircut set tongues wagging. Why? Because it seemed eerily similar to Tom's short do. Side by side, TomKat almost morphed into one person. (One sexy-looking person with great cheekbones.) It's tempting to say that Scientology may have also been behind this phenomenon as well... but it's not like L. Ron Hubbard was known for his beauty secrets or anything.
Anyway, finding pictures of the twinsies looking particularly twinsy became something of an Internet pastime.
Now that they're split up, they'll probably need to differentiate their looks a bit, lest it lead to some awkward mistaken identity-style encounters. Especially if either Tom or Katie hangs out with Larry David.
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