The Discovery Channel Shooter's Demands: The Cliff's Notes Anything

The Discovery Channel Shooter's Demands: The Cliff's Notes By  

At the offices of the Discovery Channel in Silver Spring, MD, a man named James Jae Lee took hostages on September 1, 2010. He issued the following warning: The Discovery Channel MUST broadcast to the world their commitment to save the planet and to do the following IMMEDIATELY. Here are his demands, in their full-text and then simplified into "English", just in case the rantings of a psychopath don't automatically register for you as "making sense". Full list of the Discovery Channel shooter's demands are included in actual, full-text.

 
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  1. 1

    So, I Have This Idea For A Reality Show...

    So, I Have This Idea For A Reality Show... The Discovery Channel Shooter's Demands: The Cliff's Notes Anything picture
    DISCOVERY GUNMAN:
    The Discovery Channel and it's affiliate channels MUST have daily television programs at prime time slots based on Daniel Quinn's "My Ishmael" pages 207-212 where solutions to save the planet would be done in the same way as the Industrial Revolution was done, by people building on each other's inventive ideas. Focus must be given on how people can live WITHOUT giving birth to more filthy human children since those new additions continue pollution and are pollution. A game show format contest would be in order. Perhaps also forums of leading scientists who understand and agree with the Malthus-Darwin science and the problem of human overpopulation. Do both. Do all until something WORKS and the natural world starts improving and human civilization building STOPS and is reversed! MAKE IT INTERESTING SO PEOPLE WATCH AND APPLY SOLUTIONS!!!!

    ENGLISH:
    Basically, he's saying that the Discover Channel needs to have daily, Prime Time television slots dedicated to shows where solutions to save the planet are thought of and executed. New environmental ideas, machines, etc.

    It's actually not a bad idea until he starts up with the "no more babies" thing. He's vehemently against human beings procreating, apparently, and thinks that the overpopulation problem is going to destroy the planet.

    He also makes sure to tell them to "make it interesting", which probably means he's been watching Discovery Health lately. Although his demands kind of get crazier and crazier as we go along... let's move on.
    + 1
  2. 2

    NO MORE Shows About Having Babies

    NO MORE Shows About Having Babies The Discovery Channel Shooter's Demands: The Cliff's Notes Anything picture
    DISCOVERY GUNMAN:
    All programs on Discovery Health-TLC must stop encouraging the birth of any more parasitic human infants and the false heroics behind those actions. In those programs' places, programs encouraging human sterilization and infertility must be pushed. All former pro-birth programs must now push in the direction of stopping human birth, not encouraging it.

    ENGLISH:
    Actually, it's pretty clear what he wants. He sees overpopulation as a huge problem, doesn't care about human beings, probably wishes he was a squirrel, and doesn't want any more shows about babies.

    Apparently he's seen and is also not a fan of the great Discovery shows "Obese and Pregnant", "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant" and "Jon & Kate Plus Eight", three Discovery-owned shows.
    + 1
  3. 3

    NO MORE WAR, BECAUSE WAR = BABIES

    NO MORE WAR, BECAUSE WAR=BABIES The Discovery Channel Shooter's Demands: The Cliff's Notes Anything picture
    GUNMAN:
    All programs promoting War and the technology behind those must cease.

    There is no sense in advertising weapons of mass-destruction anymore. Instead, talk about ways to disassemble civilization and concentrate the message in finding SOLUTIONS to solving global military mechanized conflict.

    Again, solutions solutions instead of just repeating the same old wars with newer weapons.

    Also, keep out the fraudulent peace movements. They are liars and fakes and had no real intention of ending the wars. ALL OF THEM ARE FAKE! On one hand, they claim they want the wars to end, on the other, they are demanding the human population increase. World War II had 2 Billion humans and after that war, the people decided that tripling the population would assure peace.

    WTF??? STUPIDITY! MORE HUMANS EQUALS MORE WAR!

    ENGLISH:
    "NO MORE WAR! Why? Not because war is immoral, but because wars seem to lead to MORE humans, somehow. In World War II we had 2 Billion humans, look at us now. THREE TIMES MORE HUMANS! I thought war was supposed to KILL people!

    So yeah, no more war. Also, anti-war and peace movements are bullshit... don't pay attention to anyone anti-war. ANYONE..."
  4. 4

    Humans Should Realize They're Destroying Everything and Should Own Up to It

    Humans Should Realize They're Destroying Everything and Should Own Up to It The Discovery Channel Shooter's Demands: The Cliff's Notes Anything picture
    GUNMAN:
    Civilization must be exposed for the filth it is.

    That, and all its disgusting religious-cultural roots and greed.

    Broadcast this message until the pollution in the planet is reversed and the human population goes down!

    This is your obligation. If you think it isn't, then get h**l off the planet! Breathe Oil!

    It is the moral obligation of everyone living otherwise what good are they??

    ENGLISH:
    He's basically saying to all of us "own up to your s**t, humanity. Religions and pollution have ruined this Earth. Discovery Channel must drive this message into the ground until this changes", which really starts sounding crazier and crazier because who the h**l watches Discovery Channel often enough for this to really make a difference?

    Even if this were on NBC, this guy would still need to go NUTS on EVERY channel to make any semblance of a difference.

    He also thinks the people at Discovery should look into space travel.
  5. 5

    No More Immigration, Arizona State Law Was Right

    No More Immigration, Arizona State Law Was Right The Discovery Channel Shooter's Demands: The Cliff's Notes Anything picture
    GUNMAN:
    Immigration: Programs must be developed to find solutions to stopping ALL immigration pollution and the anchor baby filth that follows that.

    Find solutions to stopping it.

    Call for people in the world to develop solutions to stop it completely and permanently.

    Find solutions FOR these countries so they stop sending their breeding populations to the US and the world to seek jobs and therefore breed more unwanted pollution babies.

    FIND SOLUTIONS FOR THEM TO STOP THEIR HUMAN GROWTH AND THE EXPORTATION OF THAT DISGUSTING FILTH! (The first world is feeding the population growth of the Third World and those human families are going to where the food is! They must stop procreating new humans looking for nonexistant jobs!)

    ENGLISH:
    He's basically saying "ARIZONA STATE LAW WAS RIGHT! NO MORE IMMIGRANTS! Not because of racism and intolerance, though, but because the first world is actually HELPING the third world survive and that is contributing to overpopulation. We need to thin the heard a little. Cut it out, America!"

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  1. JMW1269
    NO MORE Shows About Having Babies at 9/02/2010 11:25 AM
    People should not stop having babies, but they should stop having LITTERS! I mean, a human female has two mammary glands, which means a maximum of 2 babies can suckle at the same time. Dogs and cats have 8 mammary glands, so a litter of 8 isn't that much of a problem for them. Human females are not capable of bearing litters naturally. It took science to do that, and we glorify them. They shouldn't even be a blip on the radar, imho.

    I have 3 kids and a fourth on the way. One at a time. Because a healthy baby weighs between 6-8 pounds at birth, not 1-3.
  2. Steve M
    So, I Have This Idea For A Reality Show... at 9/02/2010 5:02 PM
    The guy was a few nuggets shy of a happy meal... Having said that.. He was pretty much right. The planet aint going to sustain us for much longer. It don't take a friggin scientist to read the writing on the wall, it's pretty much universal.



    You can only r**e and plunder the planet for so long.. somethings gotta give, h**l it's already started.
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