The Five-Year Engagement Movie Quotes

Movie and TV Quotes 28,214 views 10 items 29 voters

'The Five-Year Engagement' movie quotes include the most memorable lines from this 2012 romantic comedy film starring Jason Segel and Emily Blunt as a couple who just can't seem to make it to the altar. Despite their best intentions, things just keep getting in their way. Quotes from 'The Five-Year Engagement,' not surprisingly, are hilarious. See a favorite? Vote it up. And if you have a personal favorite quote that isn't listed, add it.

'The Five-Year Engagement' was co-written by Jason Segel and Nicholas Stoller. Stoller also directed Segel in the 2008 romantic comedy 'Forgetting Sarah Marshall,' and the pair teamed up to write the script for the 2011 comedy 'The Muppets.' 'The Five-Year Engagement' features a great cast, including Segel and Blunt, along with Chris Pratt, Alison Brie, Jacki Weaver, Rhys Ifans and Kevin Hart. When Violet and Tom first get engaged, plans for a wedding are set in motion quickly. But when Violet gets a job offer in Michigan, the big day is put off. Will these two ever tie the knot? Probably, but it'll just take a little longer than they planned.

If you're looking for more excellent movie quotes, check out these pages for the most memorable lines from 'Mirror Mirror,' 'American Reunion,' 'This Means War,' 'The Lucky One,' '21 Jump Street,' 'A Thousand Words,' 'The Vow,' 'Wanderlust,' 'The Hunger Games,' 'Friends With Benefits,' 'New Year's Eve,' 'Crazy, Stupid, Love' and 'Bridesmaids.'

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Two Years is Nothing

Violet: "I got a job for two years."
Tom: "Two years is nothing."
Violet: "Really?"
Tom: "We'll start planning the wedding again, from there."

Here's a tip: Don't put off planning the wedding, because you just never know what will happen. Life has a way of totally screwing things up -- and, in this case, that's definitely true.
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Don't Get in Front of the Train

Carol: "Here's our guest list."
Violet: "There's like, 600 people..."
Carol: "I know."
Violet: "Maybe just..."
Carol: "You don't want to get in front of this train, Violet."

Poor Violet: She's understandably overwhelmed by all of the wedding-related planning, particularly the (ever growing) guest list. Thanks to Carol (Tom's mom), the simple, elegant ceremony just became a small rock concert in size...
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Saving Private Ryan

Sylvia: "To Tom and Violet!" (raises a toast) "One assumes that everything is going to turn out like some romantic comedy, but most engagements end up like Saving Private Ryan. Good luck. God knows you're going to need it."

Violet's mother, Sylvia (Jacki Weaver), is pretty realistic. She knows that engagements can be messy -- but in this case, even she probably underestimates how messy they can get.
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Jewish Drawer

Rabbi: "Of course, the men will wear yarmulkes..."
Violet: "Babe, you don't have a yarmulke..."
Tom: "I have a whole...it's in my...Jewish drawer."

Tom has a Jewish drawer? I suppose he's had plenty of time to start one, given how long it's taking for his wedding to Violet to, you know, actually happen.
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Guy Wedding Planning

Tom: "French vanilla with coconut custard? I mean, who thinks of that? Some sort of genius."
Tarquin: "With or without the fruit compote?"
Bill: "You're gonna want the fruit compote. Mmm this cake is so good. Cake tasting is the best!"
Tom: "I know. I don't know why girls get so tense about all this planning. It's fun!"

Tom and his buddies, Tarquin (Brian Posehn) and Bill (Chris Parnell), don't have a clue about how tough planning a wedding can be. No, they get the easy part (and the fun part): cake tasting!
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