comedy The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes  

Desertrat89
3.0k votes 363 voters 39.6k views 50 items Embed
Seinfeld is arguably one of the funniest sitcoms ever, and inarguably one of the best quote-able comedies of all time. I put together a small sampling of some of the best quotes on the show, and yes, it is missing a LOT... because, come on. I have a job. (But I did manage to put in the ones I love the most that I could remember.) So, please, add your favorite quotes to the list and vote on the ones that are the best, most iconic, greatest quotes of the show's history. It's hard, I know, because so much of the funniest stuff is full bits... but if you want, go ahead and add those. Your discretion. Just the funniest, most hilariously funny stuff from Seinfeld is the only rule!

Check out more lists like all of the greatest TV shows ever made, the most hilarious TV shows and the best British TV shows
list ordered by

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118 29
Looking at cleavage is like lo... is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

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121 32
The sea was angry that day my ... is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

3
110 29
Jerry, just remember, it's not... is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

4
77 17
No Soup for You is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
udontneedtoknowmyname added No Soup for You

5
74 18
I have a bad feeling that when... is listed (or ranked) 5 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

6
90 28
When you look annoyed all the ... is listed (or ranked) 6 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

7
76 21
You know the message you're se... is listed (or ranked) 7 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

8
78 24
I need the secure packaging of... is listed (or ranked) 8 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

9
68 18
Boy, these pretzels are makin'... is listed (or ranked) 9 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

10
48 11
SERENITY NOW! is listed (or ranked) 10 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
taichungcanuck added SERENITY NOW! Frank Costanza

11
46 10
Hello, Newman. is listed (or ranked) 11 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
looksharp added Hello, Newman. Jerry

12
65 23
You know I always wanted to pr... is listed (or ranked) 12 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

13
59 19
Ranker Video
birdiejay23 added I'm Out "Kramer"

14
64 23
You're killing independent Geo... is listed (or ranked) 14 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

15
54 17
I'm much more comfortable crit... is listed (or ranked) 15 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

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62 28
Yada yada yada is listed (or ranked) 16 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

17
41 13
They're Real.....and They're S... is listed (or ranked) 17 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
falsedawn added They're Real.....and They're Spectacular! "Teri Hatcher"  

18
38 11
We're Not Gay. Not That There'... is listed (or ranked) 18 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

19
48 21
Did you know that the original... is listed (or ranked) 19 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

20
44 19
You should've seen her face. I... is listed (or ranked) 20 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

21
44 19
Elaine, breaking up is like kn... is listed (or ranked) 21 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

22
33 11
He's a re-gifter. is listed (or ranked) 22 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
looksharp added He's a re-gifter. Elaine

23
33 12
She has man hands. is listed (or ranked) 23 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
looksharp added She has man hands. Jerry

24
38 17
Every instinct I have, in ever... is listed (or ranked) 24 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

25
46 24
Dolores! is listed (or ranked) 25 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
jr4150 added Dolores! "Jerry"

26
37 18
I hate asking for change. They... is listed (or ranked) 26 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

27
12 1
when you control the mail you ... is listed (or ranked) 27 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

28
34 17
Why should I hire you to be my... is listed (or ranked) 28 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

29
37 20
I can't go to a bad movie by m... is listed (or ranked) 29 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

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40 23
You, my friend, have crossed t... is listed (or ranked) 30 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

31
21 7
Worlds are colliding. is listed (or ranked) 31 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
looksharp added Worlds are colliding. George

32
22 8
He's a close talker. is listed (or ranked) 32 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
looksharp added He's a close talker. Elaine

33
38 22
People don't just bump into ea... is listed (or ranked) 33 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

34
31 17
I want to be the one person wh... is listed (or ranked) 34 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

35
12 2
Ranker Video

36
28 17
That's the true spirit of Chri... is listed (or ranked) 36 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

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30 21
Do you ever get down on your k... is listed (or ranked) 37 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

38
13 5
He took it out. is listed (or ranked) 38 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
woogyjones50 added He took it out.

39
26 18
Nobody drives like me. Nobody.... is listed (or ranked) 39 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

40
22 16
Parking at a garage is like go... is listed (or ranked) 40 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

41
23 17
Sex, that’s meaningless, I can... is listed (or ranked) 41 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

42
23 19
Ranker Video

43
9 5
Sweet fancy Moses is listed (or ranked) 43 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes
jdathenscsr added Sweet fancy Moses

44
27 24
Look to the cookie, Elaine! is listed (or ranked) 44 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

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23 20
Women don't respect salad eate... is listed (or ranked) 45 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

46
3 2
Is not you, It´s me. Geo... is listed (or ranked) 46 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

47
18 20
The carpet sweeper is the bigg... is listed (or ranked) 47 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

48
19 22
My friend Jay Reimenschneider ... is listed (or ranked) 48 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

49
16 21
You are way past the phone cal... is listed (or ranked) 49 on the list The Funniest Seinfeld Quotes

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Ranker Video
slaft added My wallets gone Morty