Top 10 Craziest Things Ever Said By Pat Robertson Top 10 Craziest Things Ever Said By Pat Robertson

By Ian Tindell | Los Angeles
Recently, a devastating series of earthquakes rocked the small Third World country of Haiti. The country now lies in ruins because of this horrible event which has caused a still unknown number of deaths. The reason? According to TV's resident nut job Pat Robertson, it's because the Haitians entered into a pact with the devil and now he's asking them to pay up.

But that's not the only time Pat has offered us some wizard-like insight. Here's a highlight of some of Pat Robertson's most shining moments, starting with the most recent.
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    Pat Robertson on the Earthquake in Haiti
    The news anchor may refer to Pat Robertson's "blessing in disguise" (0:19) explanation for the Haiti earthquake as a "pretty optimistic attitude" (0:28), but we sure as hell don't. (See what we did there? Hell reference? No? Okay, moving on... ) 0:48 - Robertson delivered a damning accusation to the Haitian people by claiming that they "swore a pact with the devil" during the French Revolution. It's a true story. He was there. This man literally believes in demons AND many people STILL ask him for advice on a regular basis... let's keep going.
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    Pat Robertson on Karate + Chuck Norris
    This Pat Robertson clip gets a little tricky because he's almost likable when he starts talking about Chuck Norris. References to "ghetto kids" (0:40) dapple the conversation but hey, the guy's got to start slow. He's like an orchestra of crazy, he needs to "build." In the long run, a Pat Robertson show is a Pat Robertson show and the crazy shit has gotta come out somehow. And boy does it come at... 1:00 - when Pat starts talking about martial artists inhaling "demon spirits." He then wards off the audience from having anything to do with that type of stuff. This is one of the craziest things he's ever said, but with it he's accomplished something awesome and therefore finally contributed something positive to this world: giving us the idea that Chuck Norris' awesomeness is powered by DEMONS. Freaking DEMONS! Hell yeah! (See what we did there? Hell reference? No? Moving on... )
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    Pat Robertson Predicts Terrorists
    Every year Pat Robertson talks to God and God tells him what to expect for the upcoming year. In 2007, God told him about some terrorist attacks that would happen at the end of the year killing possibly millions of people. MILLIONS. Move over Roland Emmerich, Robertson's got opinions to shoot at America with a THOUGHT-CANNON! Mr. Robertson padded his prediction by adding that maybe if the people prayed hard enough, the attacks won't happen. I guess in 2007 people prayed hard enough. Not so much in 2001. Clever, Mr. Robertson, real clever. Watch from 00:20 on.
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    The Dangers of Yoga
    0:48 Connecting yoga to Hinduism and pantheism, Mr. Robertson is convinced that "it gets really spooky". In actuality, the only thing spooky about yoga is if we ever saw Mr. Robertson in a downward dog position. *Shudder*
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    Pat Robertson on Gay Marriage/Beastiality
    The first minute of this video gives you what Pat Robertson really said, but watch the video from 1:03 to the end get the full Pat Robertson visual and soundtrack. Embrace your hatred... Mr. Robertson thinks he can define gay marriage on his own terms. Everything that comes out of his mouth is much like what's in his head, unicorns and leprechauns. He relates gay marriage to polygamy, beastiality, child molestation and pedophilia. The only plus side of his verbal spillage is that it makes it easier for us to throw out all his ideas on those topics at one time.
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    Pat Robertson Figures Out How To Deal w/ Your Gay Son
    Watch 0:20-1:49 for Pat Robertson's advice on how to cure your gay son. First of all, the person that calls in refers to their son as "their neighbor". Well, Pat Robertson takes this very well and starts off by correcting the question, saying "he's not your neighbor, he's your son" (0:35). And that's about all the love you're going to get from Pat if you're gay. From there, he outs all homosexuals as "victims of sexual abuse". Of course, something or someONE has to have MADE them that way, right? Because homosexuality is TOTALLY an STD. Pat Robertson's head: "Don't sneeze on me! No! No!...Awww, now I'm gay!" Then he proceeds to call gays an "abomination before God", in a very matter-of-fact way, as he does.
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    Pat Robertson on Hurricane Katrina
    1:01 - In another superman-like leap of logic, Pat Robertson links Hurricane Katrina to supporting abortion or "the wholesale slaughter of innocent children." Whatchu talkin' bout, Robertson? Furthermore, according to our favorite Troll-doll-lookalike, anyone who supports abortion will be "vomited out of the earth" and "be unable to defend themselves." Is there an unknown clinic harvesting millions of unborn babies for use in Satanic rituals somewhere in Louisiana? If you're listening out there, Pat Robertson says it's your fault! Thanks a lot, guys.
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    September 11th
    0:29 - On September 11th, 2001 a terrible tragedy struck our country and we all know who was to blame: the ACLU, abortionists, feminists, homosexuals and jews. Wait, what? 1:15 - The best part of the video, however, is when Pat Robertson (who for once is upstaged by someone just as matter-of-fact-insane as he is) says (bewildered) "Well I -- I totally concur." If fundamentalism was a comic book, these guys would be Batman and Robin.
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    That Guy Was A *BLEEP*
    I know, I know, lots of Homophobia here... but his ardent belief that homosexuality is the equivalent of "adult cooties" is both sad and hilarious to me. Pat Robertson takes a call from an angry pro-choice Republican on Larry King Live. He defends himself for a bit, taking a few things the caller said out of context, then the station goes to a commercial break... 01:04 - When he assumes the cameras aren't rolling, Pat Robertson gets really homophobtastic with his vocabulary by calling the guy a certain derogatory term. The best part is the reassurance he gives the person he's speaking to..."as sure as you're alive."
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    Pat Robertson: Earthquake, Tornadoes = 'Birth Pangs'
    0:49 - So, he calls the China earthquake, tornadoes in California, and other natural disasters "birth pangs" for a pregnant Earth... then starts talking about a new order? The craziest and scariest part is how happy he seems to be about the concept of the biblical apocalypse happening soon... very soon.
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    Bonus: Pat Robertson Calls for Assassination
    Because the craziness of Pat Robertson clearly can't fit into a top ten list, by popular demand, here is Pat Robertson calling for the assassination of Hugo Chavez that can be found at 00:35 in this video. Pat doesn't mention God here but I think we can all rest assured that Mr. Robertson got the OK from the Man Upstairs before he started running off his mouth yet again.
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21 Comments


by hmm at April 08, 2010 20:44
I won't judge him. I think although at times things do sound crazy at the very least he is trying to help people and bring hope to those who need it. Maybe most of the people commenting on here feel like they don't need hope. But it sounds to me like the same people who posted this are judging him. Unless you know the man and his heart don't judge him. I would say take time to educate yourself on what he is saying then make your decision. Don't jump on the hater band wagon.

  by anonymous at February 11, 2010 03:52
good list

by Zach at February 07, 2010 01:11
Pat Robertson is a great example how all religions suffer from crazy ideologues. It's frightening that people take him seriously.

by kat721 at February 01, 2010 07:23
I used to watch 700 club quite a bit, back maybe 13-14 years ago. Even back then, he often made remarks that I considered way too judgmental for a Christian. It's NOT our place to judge. Period. That is God's job! In more recent years, he's pulled a few real doozeys...that received a lot of media attention...as listed above. This Haiti thing is probably the worst of all. That is the most horrid, unchristian thing I have EVER heard a 'Christian leader' say. I say, "Shame on you Pat...You should have known better!" Oooops! Was I being a little judgmental there...??? What a jerk!

by crzygirl at January 27, 2010 16:34
this list of pat robertson. list 10 of the best reasons why i dislike him so much

by howdyhigh at January 27, 2010 16:23
Some of the things pat robertson has said are ridiculous. There is nothing optimistic about the earthquake in Haiti, there is no bright side to it.

by crzygirl at January 27, 2010 16:35
the haiti ignorance is only the start to the 10 craziest things said by pat robertson. i can't believe some of the things that come out of his mouth

by tee hee at January 25, 2010 15:06
He also once said he could leg press 2,400 lbs. Breaking the record of a Florida college football play er by 600lbs.

  by anonymous at January 25, 2010 10:56
You forgot the assassination of Hugo Chavez comment, as well as the 400lb leg press.

by David762 at January 25, 2010 07:58
Sorry Ian, but I thought that you really missed one of the top 10 Rev. Pat Robertson wing-nut quotes -- when he called out, on the 700 Club, for the assassination of President Hugo Chavez of Venezuela. It proves without any doubts that Robertson is more like a C-Street Mobster than a Christian -- I have yet to hear of any good works of his like subsidizing the high cost of fuel oil to the poor of the USA Northeast in order to survive the cold winters there. I have heard on the Internet that Robertson is not only an American Taliban in good standing, but that he also likes little boys -- he has yet to counter either claim, so it must be true ...

by Ian Tindell at January 25, 2010 15:57
The Hugo Chavez comment has now been added as a bonus video.

by Bad Wolf at January 25, 2010 05:48
The fact that Pat Robertson talks to God every day isn't remakable - Virtually every religious/spiritual person "talks" to their particular deity on more-or-less regular terms. What is unusual and rather scary, is Pat actually thinks that GOD TALKS BACK TO HIM on a regular schedule. As far as this list is concerned, I'm amazed the editors were able to prise out the top 10. That's like finding the 10 nastiest fecal missiles in a VERY large cesspool.

by Louie at January 24, 2010 18:04
What drugs is this dude on?

by AMERICAPHILE MINISTRIES at January 24, 2010 16:23
AMERICAPHILE MINISTIES STANDS UP AND SUPPORTS PAT ROBERTSON AGAINST THE SLANDER OF OLBERWOMYN AND OTHE LIBTARDS AS PERSECUTIONS INCREASE IN THESE LAST DAYS!!!!! http://americaphile.blogspot.com/

by shocktreatment at January 25, 2010 08:49
Demented is as demented does, and man, you do--

by ThorGoLucky at January 25, 2010 16:54
But he posted in ALL CAPS and several exclamation points so it must be true! Remember, Bronze Age Jewish goat herders had the universe all figured out!

by Guerrilleroculto at January 23, 2010 22:48
You totally forgot when Pat Robertson called for the assassination of Venezuelan President, Hugo Chávez. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AmChUEG-g4Q

by Ian Tindell at January 23, 2010 23:59
Ha! Pat just says so many crazy things that it's hard to keep track.

by dipstick at January 23, 2010 15:30
Pat says that polygamy goes against biblical morality. Why is it, then, that polygamy is all over the old testament, and none of its practitioners (including David and Solomon) are ever condemned for it, or told they are immoral, or presented as anything other than normal. I mean, Joseph Smith didn't just come up with the idea of plural marriage out of thin air - he very clearly placed the practice in the context of biblical tradition.

  by anonymous at January 23, 2010 08:19
Pat talks to God daily. Just like most psychotics. Scary that people (who can barely afford it) continue to send him money...

by Clark Benson at January 21, 2010 14:54
"The Dangers of Yoga". that says it all...
 

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