<![CDATA[Ranker: Recent offbeat Lists]]> http://www.ranker.com/tags/offbeat http://www.ranker.com/img/skin2/logo.gif Most Viewed Lists on Ranker http://www.ranker.com/tags/offbeat <![CDATA[30 Mind-Bending Glitch in the Matrix Pictures]]> http://www.ranker.com/list/glitch-in-the-matrix-pics/ashley-reign
Is there a glitch in the matrix? These pictures sure seem like proof! If you were alive at any point during 1999 or soon thereafter, odds are that you've seen The Matrix, starring Keanu Reeves. It quickly became a huge blockbuster hit, spawning many sequels (of questionable quality), but was it just a movie? Or was it a documentary? There are those among us who still just can’t help but wonder from time to time about the tale’s validity. While hopefully this is not something you can relate to on a regular basis, the following collection of glitch in the matrix pictures may just leave you wondering.

For those of you unfamiliar with the concept of The Matrix, it basically suggests that our real bodies are all actually sitting around in pods somewhere, but we don’t know it because our minds are programmed to project a false reality all around us called “the Matrix.” You see, this hallucination that we think is “reality” is actually one big dream, programmed by machines to keep us from realizing that they are actually using our bodies as power sources. Never fear however, because somewhere out there in the “real” world, Keanu Reeves and a bunch of other guys dressed in black leather are running around trying to figure out how to unplug us. Comforting right?

Well, as great a job as our hypothetical captors have done, fooling us into thinking we’re actually here, every now and then the matrix experiences a bit of a “glitch.” Whether you consider the following matrix glitch pictures proof of the horrible truth or just a fun, trippy way to spend a lunch hour, be sure to upvote the strangest and most surreal glitch pics below!

http://www.ranker.com/list/glitch-in-the-matrix-pics/ashley-reign, other,

Matrix Cat Stalks Herself

This Double Bench Disaster

This Lady Having Lunch with Herself

This Matrix Bug on the Bus

This Cloned Pair of Terrifyingly Short Shorts

This Guy Shopping Multiple Aisles at Once

This Guy Spying on Himself Spying on Himself

Attack of the Frizzy Hair-Do

This Lady Is Getting a Little Ahead of Herself

This Guy Sitting on Both Ends of the Bench


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/ashley-reign http://www.ranker.com/list/glitch-in-the-matrix-pics/ashley-reign
<![CDATA[Things That Drunk-You Should Stay Away From]]> http://www.ranker.com/list/things-you-should-not-do-while-drunk/ashley-reign
As anyone who has ever overdone it while drinking quite possibly already knows, there’s a point around beer number four or five when sober-you sort of begins to fade into the background. Though this may be exactly the point at which sober-you vowed before setting out to cut yourself off and stop drinking, it’s quite possibly also the point where you start to realize that there’s now someone else in control. That’s right, it’s none other than drunk-you and if there’s one thing drunk-you does well, it’s bitch slap sober-you’s best intentions. That’s why we’ve compiled this of things you shouldn’t do while drinking, in order to help you identify things that drunk-you should totally stay away from.

Now those of you more skilled in the arts of moderation may be wondering, “Who is this drunk-me and what does he/she want?” In short: A night filled with antics capable of horrifying sober-you for years to come. Others of you have undoubtedly already learned the hard way exactly what drunk-you is capable of, quite possibly as you lay shriveled near a toilet in a strange, lonely bathroom.

Regardless, even if it’s happened to you in the past, this list will allow you to finally say “Never again!” to drunk-you’s 80-proof antics. Though we in no way condone overindulging, we figure that at the very least, these funny pictures of drunk people could come in handy as a sort of emergency reference the next time you need the slightest bit of a reminder of things you shouldn’t do while drinking!


http://www.ranker.com/list/things-you-should-not-do-while-drunk/ashley-reign,

Other Drunks Who Are Unlikely to Pass Out First

Any Wheeled Objects That Drunk-You Might Attempt to Pilot

Extreme Climates of Any Sort

Sneaky Shortcuts and/or Narrow Passages

Photos - Even and Perhaps Especially Their Backgrounds

Fitness of Any Sort

Glass in General

Public Places That Drunk-You Could Possibly Mistake for Home

Anyone, Yes Anyone, Wielding a Permanent Marker

The Cops - Definitely the Cops


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/ashley-reign http://www.ranker.com/list/things-you-should-not-do-while-drunk/ashley-reign
<![CDATA[The Scariest Animals in the World]]> http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/the-animals-you-are-the-most-scared-of
We're all more scared of one thing than another. Maybe it's the idea of being mauled by a Grizzly or having spiders crawl in your ear while you're sleeping. Maybe it's just the IDEA that a snake might be nearby. Whatever it is, vote on the animal that scares you the most, and of course, feel free to add any of the scariest animals in the world that might be missing from this list.

Any list of the scariest animals in the world will likely include sharks, spiders, and snakes. But what terrifies one person might not scare another at all. It's interesting to look at why certain animals strike fear, and others don't. Is it because many of the animals listed here are potentially deadly? Some spiders' bites can be horrible, but spiders can also be pretty amazing.

Sure, but that doesn't explain why cockroaches freak people out (if you don't believe me, just check the list, and see the votes for yourself). It's highly unlikely that you'll be done in by a killer cockroach – so what gives? Well, they're creepy, they're crawly and (depending on where you live) they *can* fly. That qualifies as scary.

And yes, some of the scariest animals listed here, we'll never ever encounter in real life. Oh, we might see a great white shark in an aquarium or on TV during Shark Week, but really? The odds of us actually coming face to face with a great white are pretty slim. Still, we've all seen Jaws, so that sucker shoots to the top of the list. And bats: Yes, some believe they are scary, but there are a lot of myths surrounding these and other animals that, if you knew more, might make them a bit less terrifying.

Which animals scare you the most? Are they insects? Reptiles? Mammals (and yes, this includes man)? Time to vote!
http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/the-animals-you-are-the-most-scared-of,

Crocodile

Cobra

Lion

Black Widow Spider

Pirahna

Great white shark

Black mamba

Grizzly Bear

Spider

Scorpion


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/ranker-community http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/the-animals-you-are-the-most-scared-of
<![CDATA[The Best TV Villains of All Time]]> http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/best-tv-villains-of-all-time
The best TV villains of all time rank among some of the greatest TV characters of all time as well as some of the creepiest TV characters ever. While some TV villains exist to make the lead characters appear more heroic, some of them are just plain old, nasty jerks. Regardless of their motivations, the top TV bad guys make us want to bust into the TV and kick some butt, fictional style.

Many of TV's greatest greatest villains didn't start that way; some of these men and women started out as virtuous people who took a skid into the darker ways of the world. Think of Breaking Bad's Gustavo Fring, a legitimate business man turned meth trafficking d-bag. Or Dexter Morgan who started out killing only bad guys and then went and got tangled up with killing people as a CYA offensive action. Of course, there's also people like Game of Throne's Joffrey Baratheon and The Simpsons' C. Montgomery Burns who seem to get off on tormenting people. They are the worst kind of awesome bad guys.

Who is the best bad guy on TV? What television shows have the greatest TV villains?  This best television villains list has all the top TV villains in one place for you to vote on. If your favorite TV villain isn't on the list of the greatest TV villains, make sure to add them so other voters get to hate them as much as you do.
http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/best-tv-villains-of-all-time,

Cersei Baratheon

Hannibal Lecter

Joffrey Baratheon

Mr. Burns

Spike

Sylar

Tywin Lannister

Lex Luthor

Mr. Gold

The Joker


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/ranker-community http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/best-tv-villains-of-all-time
<![CDATA[These Unusual Mental Disorders Are Rare but Real]]> http://www.ranker.com/list/weird-mental-disorders/mike-rothschild
Mental illness is sometimes obvious and easily diagnosed, but in rare cases, psychological and neurological disorders are so strange that they're almost unbelievable. The brain is a staggeringly complex organ capable of surprises that science can't explain even after centuries of study. Some mental disorders strike such a tiny fraction of the population that there's virtually no research available, meaning neither their cause nor their cure are known.

These rare mental illnesses can be so singular and perplexing that they weren't even accepted as legitimate disorders until recently. Some change the way language is used and perceived. Others do the same to vision or motor skills. And some are so bizarre that they alter a patient's accent or make them believe they're an entirely different species. Sufferers of these illnesses can lose control of their limbs, see afterimages everywhere, think their loved ones are imposters, and - in one inexplicable case - are made violently ill by the sound of one TV news anchor's voice.

This list takes you on a tour of the weird side of brain science with some of the rarest and least-understood mental disorders that have ever afflicted humans. These brain disorders are so unique that you may never have heard of them and may even not believe them at first, but they're all totally real.

http://www.ranker.com/list/weird-mental-disorders/mike-rothschild,

Palinopsia
Palinopsia itself is a common phenomenon. It's the afterimage that happens when you’ve looked at something bright. In a small number of people, however, these images don’t entirely fade. This is often caused by brain damage or a tumor. One famous case involved a woman who went to a Christmas party and suddenly started seeing a Santa Claus beard superimposed on other guests after speaking to the party’s Santa.

Othello Syndrome
While it’s natural to be a little jealous when someone else shows affection to your intimate partner, Othello Syndrome takes that to a delusional extreme. It was discovered in older patients taking dopamine to treat Parkinson ’s disease, but the mechanism by which it actually occurs is still unknown. It leads patients to suspect their partners of infidelity, leading to extreme monitoring, controlling behavior, and even violence – all accompanied by extreme denial.
Aboulomania
The pathological inability to make decisions, aboulomania causes sufferers to become gripped by “paralysis by analysis,” a kind of mental vapor lock, when faced with a choice about something, even something trivial.

Mary Hart Syndrome
An incredibly specific kind of mental illness, Mary Hart Syndrome was named after the Entertainment Tonight anchor whose voice caused seizures and confusion in a woman in the early '90s. No, really. That actually happened. It’s likely that the seizures were caused by a something unique in Hart’s tone of voice and not anything that she specifically was saying.
Walking Corpse Syndrome
Found mostly in chronic insomniacs and those suffering from depression or drug-induced psychosis, Walking Corpse Syndrome (also called Cotard’s Syndrome) leaves its sufferers thinking that they are, in fact, dead. They truly believe they are zombies, have no brain, and do not exist. It’s an extremely rare disease, which is good, because it’s also very hard to treat.
Caffeine-Induced Anxiety
Coffee, as you're probably aware, elevates the heart rate, increases alertness, and generally wakes you the heck up. But if you already suffer from anxiety or an anxiety disorder, too much caffeine might just send your body and mind off on a rocket ride of stress and jumpiness.

Boanthropy
Do you graze on grass? Do you moo at inappropriate times? If you’re suffering from the pathological delusion that you’re a cow, you've probably come down with a case of boanthropy. You’d be in good company, as the Biblical king Nebuchadnezzar was thought to have been in the grip of an illness that made him “eat grass as oxen.”

Jerusalem Syndrome
Did you walk into the holiest city on Earth and suddenly become gripped by the feeling that you’re the messiah? Then you might have Jerusalem Syndrome, a mental disorder where tourists to the Old City are utterly convinced that they’re hearing the voice of God telling them that they’re the Chosen One. It’s very rare, affecting only around 100 people a year, mostly evangelical Christians who simply become overawed by the majesty of Jerusalem. A small minority of severe cases actually require hospitalization. It’s likely that the city itself is just a trigger for pre-existing psychiatric issues, and plenty of other cities have had “syndromes” attached to them as well.
Taijin Kyofusho
Roughly translated to “disorder of fear of interpersonal relations,” Taijin Kyofusho is a primarily Japanese mental illness that leaves its sufferers terrified of making social faux pas. A person dealing with this might think of their body as displeasing and their appearance embarrassing. Or they could believe that they possess an odor, habit, or facial feature that causes shame in another. The disorder, found in as many as 20% of Japanese men, can be a serious problem when one is faced with the rigid social codes of Japanese commerce.
Erotomania
Often found in stalkers like those who plagued David Letterman and Jodie Foster, erotomania fools its sufferers into thinking someone else, usually a celebrity or well-known person, is in love with them. This is why many stalkers claim that they themselves were the ones being stalked by the celebrity that they were stalking.

]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/mike-rothschild http://www.ranker.com/list/weird-mental-disorders/mike-rothschild
<![CDATA[The Saddest Television Deaths Ever]]> http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/saddest-television-deaths
Spoilers everywhere, of course! List of the saddest TV deaths as voted and ranked by fans. TV shows have long been able to penetrate the core of the human spirit, and audiences grow attached to characters they watch week after week and season after season. These TV character deaths are among the saddest, most memorable, and most gut wrenching to ever grace the silver screen - whether they were surprises or a long time coming. The list includes violent deaths, freak accidents, murders, deaths from illness, and a wide range of other sad TV death scenes.

Vote for those saddest TV deaths that impacted you most and watch them move to the top of the list, or click Re-Rank to make your own version of this list.
http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/saddest-television-deaths,

Bobby Singer

Buffy Summers

DriveSHAFT

Edith Bunker

Joyce Summers

Mark Greene

Spike

Eddard Stark

Robb Stark

Lt. Colonel Henry Blake


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/ranker-community http://www.ranker.com/crowdranked-list/saddest-television-deaths
<![CDATA[Cute Characters Who Say the Most F*cked Up Things]]> http://www.ranker.com/list/cute-characters-with-dirty-mouths/coreybarger
Who doesn’t love cute characters that steal the show? Everyone has those favorite adorable characters from their childhood that they found funny or adorable. But these days, the cuter the character are the more crass and inappropriate they can be. You can get away with more if you are considered adorable! Which cute characters say awful things?

There are Stewie and Brian from Family Guy, a baby and dog who know how to curse and work language for evil like few other characters can. Then there's that other Seth MacFarlane creation, the foul-mouthed Ted, from Ted and Ted 2. Many other adorable, sweet, old, and seemingly innocent characters have appeared on television and in movies throughout the years, though your opinion of their sweetness likely changed the second they opened their mouths.
 
Check out the list of the cutest characters who say some seriously f*cked up things. This list tells their backstory along with some of their best quotes. It will have you laughing at everything from a talking bear to a creepy grandfather.
 
Make sure to vote up the characters below that are the most crass, but also adorable. What makes adorable characters that say horrible things so funny? Let everyone know what you think in the comments section!

http://www.ranker.com/list/cute-characters-with-dirty-mouths/coreybarger,

Bender
Bender is a robot who drinks to recharge himself. He is a gambler who likes hookers and smokes cigars. He is always the center of attention. 

Quotes:
Bender: You know what cheers me up? Other people’s misfortune.
 
Bender: Blackmail is such an ugly word. I prefer extortion. The ‘x’ makes it sound cool.

Bender: You’re a pimple on society’s ass and you’ll never amount to anything!
 
Bender: Bite my shiny metal ass.


Brian Griffin
Brian Griffin is the 8-year-old dog belonging to the Griffin family. He can speak in complete sentences and acts like a human. He is also best friends with Peter.

Quotes: 
Brian (to Peter): Lois has gained some weight since you guys stopped having sex. Maybe you should, uh, you know, have some sex.
 
Meg: Wow, Brian! Have you lost weight? You gotta tell me your secret!
Brian: Here's a hint: Put down the fork!

Brian: I was just watching this special on VH1 about Gwen Stefani. I don't know what a hollaback girl is, all I know is I want her dead.


Eric Cartman
Cartman is 10 years old and weighs around 90 pounds. He is friends with Stan, Kyle, and Kenny, although the others don't consider him their friend. He curses more than you would probably expect from a child.

Quotes:
Cartman: Dude, I'll make you eat your parents.
 
Cartman: It’s a man's obligation to stick high boneration in a woman's separation: this sort of penetration will increase the population of the younger generation.
 
Cartman: Special Olympics, what's so special about it?


Meatwad
He is literally a wad of meat, who is on the Hunger Force. He is easily manipulated by his friends, is much like a child, and by far the dumbest character of the cast. He often mistakes words and doesn't know their true meanings.

Quotes:
Meatwad: I have a two-part question: one, what's he doin'? and, two, should we light him on fire? 
 
Frylock: You cannot cut someone's lawn with matches, Meatwad. 
Meatwad: Look, I know that; you gotta have gasoline, otherwise how's it gonna spread to the street? 
 
Meatwad: These underwear were so cheap at the store because I got them pre-skidded.


Ralph Wiggum
Ralph, the son of Police Chief Wiggum, is a student at Springfield Elementary with Bart and Lisa. He is pretty incoherent most of the time. He doesn't have friends at school and is often made fun of.

Quotes:
Ralph: [giving report] ... and when the Doctor told me I didn't have worms anymore, that was the happiest day of my life. 
 
Ralph: Clouds are God's sneezes! 
 
Ralph: When I grow up, I'm going to Bovine University!


Stewie Griffin
Stewie is the 1-year-old child of Peter and Lois Griffin. He aspires to world domination and is not afraid to point out your flaws. For a baby, he is very smart and can speak eloquently in a British accent.

Quotes:
Lois: Oh, I haven't been on a college campus in years. Everything seems so different.
Stewie: Really? Perhaps if you laid on your back with your ankles behind your ears that would ring a few bells.
 
Stewie: Die, Lois! 
 
Stewie (reading the Bible): My, my. What a thumping good read! Lions eating Christians, people nailing each other to two-by-fours. I say, you won't find that in Winnie the Pooh.

Herbert
Herbert is one of the neighbors to the Griffin family. He seems very kind and even has a whistle lisp. However, he walks around in a robe and is seen making inappropriate comments to teenage boys.

Quotes:
HerbertYou want a popsicle? My cellar’s full of popsicles!
 
Herbert: If it gets too hot and sweaty for you out here feel free to take your shirt off.
 
Herbert: Whoever can swallow the most Tylenol PM wins.


Ted from "Ted"
Ted is a magical bear that came to life when his best friend John wish, for exactly that, came true. He smokes, drinks, and does drugs. Most people believe he is sweet and cuddly, at least until he opens his mouth. 

Quotes:
Frank: You think you got what it takes?
Ted: I'll tell you what I got. Your wife's p*ssy on my breath.
Frank: Nobody's ever spoken to me like that before.
Ted: That's because their mouths were full of your wife's box.
 
Ted: [dressed in a suit and tie] I look stupid.
John: No, you don't, you look dapper.
Ted: John, I look like something you give to your kid when you tell 'em Grandma died.
 
Ted: Company's turning 20, huh? So you can bang it but you can't get it drunk.


Roger Smith from "American Dad"
Roger is an alien who lives with the Smith family. He is very self-centered and sarcastic. He enjoys alcohol, watching TV, and eating junk food. He came to live with the Smiths when he saved Roger from Area 51. 

Quotes:
Roger: Steve, before she tells you your future, let me tell you her past: forty years of alcoholism and three doctorless abortions.”
 
Roger: This guy’s a douche with a capital bag!
 
Roger: Wow, Hayley, your cheek’s pregnant. Who’s the father? Touching your face all day with your greasy hands?


Klaus Heisler from "American Dad!"
Klaus is an East German Olympian stuck in the body of a goldfish. His brainwaves were switched with the fish in 1986 to prevent him from winning the gold at the winter Olympics. He joins the family when the CIA orders Stan to take him home.

Quotes:
Klaus: [referring to Roger the Alien] I wish he'd get sick like ET. 
 
Klaus: There's an old German saying: "don't blame the fish." There are other sayings, but they, um, mostly involve genocide. 
 
Klaus: You know, every time you interrupt someone, your penis gets a little shorter.


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/coreybarger http://www.ranker.com/list/cute-characters-with-dirty-mouths/coreybarger
<![CDATA[Funny Sign Burnouts]]> http://www.ranker.com/list/funny-sign-burnouts/ashley-reign
As famed Shakespearean heroine Juliet once asked, “What’s in a name?” Well, sometimes quite a bit actually. As you’ll see among the unfortunate sign disasters below, sometimes a Home Depot or Mexican restaurant by any other name does not smell quite so sweet. Here we’ve collected some of the greatest funny sign burnouts of all time in order to show you what we mean.

Though the signs you’ll see here serve their purpose by day, by night they go rogue and demonstrate exactly how important fixing a burned out letter or two can be. As these funny sign burnouts prove with delightful hilarity, sometimes a few little letters can mean the difference between selling a legitimate product and getting investigated by the authorities.

We’ve got signs offering consumers everything from drugs and loose women to crappy buffet dinners and offensive Mexican food. So if you’re looking for a good laugh or the chance to show your own employees the important of sign maintenance, you’ve come to the right place. You’ll see shoe stores appear to turn to brothels, restaurants go from appetizing to disturbing, and even street lights go from helpful to offensive, right before your very eyes. So, get ready for a grin as you witness the hidden insults hidden in popular store names.

http://www.ranker.com/list/funny-sign-burnouts/ashley-reign,

"At Least We Own It"

"A Hot Mom Hangout Since 1969"

"There's Nothing Subliminal About Us!"

"...That We Can't Guarantee Will End Well"

This Can't Possibly Be Real

The Netflix Take-Over Pushes Blockbuster Over the Edge

"F--- Ya if You Disagree!"

Hint #1 Your Employees May Be Disgruntled

"When You Need Ass Fast!"

"Your Source for Great Screws!"


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/ashley-reign http://www.ranker.com/list/funny-sign-burnouts/ashley-reign
<![CDATA[You Might Be a Redneck If...]]> http://www.ranker.com/list/what-are-rednecks/ashley-reign
Have you heard the term “redneck” throughout the years without ever really knowing exactly what it meant? Perhaps you yourself were recently accused of being of the redneck persuasion and are wondering if there’s any truth to the claim? If so, then fear not because you’ve just found the only redneck identification guide you’ll ever need. Here, you can find answers to questions such as “what are rednecks?” and “how do I know if I’ve come across a real life redneck?”
 
This is list of common redneck characteristics has been compiled thanks to experts around the country, all of whom have spent a great deal of time living within actual redneck communities. Some among them were even born rednecks themselves, but were forced from their communities due to an inability to carry on their people’s traditions. Some were forced to leave their kind due to unfortunate conditions such as "ears too sensitive to handle the noise of muffler-less trucks" or "allergies to beer that rendered them social pariahs throughout multiple counties."
 
Regardless of their backstories, these experts have banded together in order to answer the age old question, “what is a redneck?” once and for all. So the next time you find yourself broken down in the middle of nowhere, you’ll be able to determine whether you’ve found yourself in redneck country as soon as the first tow truck driver named Jim Bob arrives. By familiarizing yourself with the ways of redneck-kind you’ll not only be able to identify a redneck from a mile away, you’ll also gain the skills necessary to survive within their culture until help arrives.

http://www.ranker.com/list/what-are-rednecks/ashley-reign,

Items Such as This Regularly Make Your Local News
Do you know anyone who regularly subscribes to a newspaper? If it's only because they consider it a toilet paper delivery service, skip the rest of the info, because you are most definitely a redneck.

If not however, go ahead and take a flip through your local publication. Do your local reporters seem to be... scraping the bottom of the barrel, as they say? If an overt majority of the stories featured detailed incidents involving roadkill, Walmart, rodents, or mind boggling stupidity, you quite possibly live in an area where redneck-ery runs free.
Any of Your Home Decor Was Once Used to Kill a Woodland Creature
Often folks tend to focus on the negative aspects of redneck culture, such as poor dental hygiene or perpetual unemployment. However, rest assured that those of the redneck persuasion also have their strengths. Among them, is an ability to recycle damn near anything.

Whether it's roadkill or ammo, your average redneck can make almost any piece of trash into a treasure. After all, they don't call 'em "trashy" for nothing!
You've Never Met a Car You Couldn't Use as an Off-Road Vehicle
Ever been amazed at a beagle puppy's seemingly built-in ability to sniff out a scent from birth? Such is the ability of a true redneck man when it comes to putting large wheels on sh*t. 

Though no one can quite explain it, even a redneck with the lowliest of second grade educations will almost certainly posses an inherent ability to help anything that rolls reach for new heights - literally. Though pickup trucks are prized as the vehicles of royalty among their kind, the average redneck will jump at the chance to make pretty much anything into an off-road vehicle. Whether it be a wimpy Prius or their own Camaro, anything a redneck touches seems to magically turn all-terrain. 
You've Ever Purchased Anything 80 Proof Without Leaving Your Car
If you approached this list assuming that the term "redneck" is always an unfortunate thing, then get ready to color yourself mistaken. 

While there are definitely downsides to living among rednecks, such as being the subject of overt sexism, racism, and extreme class prejudice, there is also an upside or two. Among the top benefits of the redneck life is a modern miracle known as the drive-through beer barn.

Want to buy a 24-pack without leaving your truck? Wish you could order a handle of vodka with the ease of a Big Mac meal? Well if you are a true redneck, you not only know of a location where this is possible, you probably already have a trip planned for tonight.
You Can't Even Remember What Color Your Car Is
If there's one thing rednecks love, it's mud. Whenever the situation presents itself, you may find them doing anything from wrestling in to riding ATV's through the muddiest post-rain spot they can find. Particularly favored among redneck-kind is the art of "muddin'."

Contrary to popular belief, those aren't just really earthy paint jobs they tend to sport on their trucks, but trophies of a good romp through a freshly brewed mud patch. This is why, if you laugh in the face of car washes, you may be of the redneck persuasion.

Bonus points if you've ever purposely driven into a situation a tractor was required to pull you out of. 
Your Idea of an Exotic Vacation Includes a County Fair of Any Sort
To quote television's redneck classic My Name Is Earl, the county fair has always retained a place in the heart of rednecks everywhere due to the fact that "It's like Disneyland for poor people." Few opportunities are as magical among redneck-kind as the yearly chance to drunkenly risk your life while whirling around in large machinery that was sloppily constructed by a band of even drunker carnival folk three hours earlier.

So it follows that if you yourself have ever worked for, been proposed to at, or been impregnated during a county fair, you may officially wear the badge of redneck-dom. If none of the above are true (yet!) but sound awesome to you in any way, you may indeed have redneck tendencies as well.

If any of the above are not only true but happened on the tilt-a-whirl, there's a strong possibility that you are redneck royalty.
Signs Such as These Are Indicitive of a Classy Joint
Among the easiest way to suss out whether someone, yourself included, might be a redneck is to examine their stance on cigarettes and guns. If, at the moment, you currently have each on your person with the full intent to use both soon, it's quite possibly safe to assume that you are of the redneck variety.

Another key may be found in examining the establishments in your town in search of signs such as those found above. If indeed restaurants which you consider "classy" or "swanky" feel it necessary to specify that items of this sort may not enter, it may be indicative that you are currently surrounded by a large redneck population.

Additionally, if you or anyone you know have ever refused to frequent an establishment such as the one above due to concern for your Constitutional rights, congratulations, sir or madam, you are as redneck as they come!
Christmas Lights Adorn Your Home Year-Round
Throughout the ages, rednecks have made no secret of their culture's appreciation of several items. Among them you'll find things such as taxidermy, cheap beer, and anything that fires a bullet of any sort. 

However, near the top of any true redneck's "favorite things in life" list, you're almost guaranteed to find several strands of Christmas lights. With few exceptions, these lights are most likely decorating their home at any given time of year, where they've been hanging since they were first put up about 10 years ago.

You've Ever Had a Mullet for Any Reason Other Than a Halloween Party
If you ever see a mullet existing unchallenged in any environment, then even if none of the other criteria here apply, you are most certainly in the presence of a redneck. Though no one knows quite where it came from or how it first evolved, the mullet has become one of the more terrifying staples of redneck fashion. 

Though some people attempt to explain its existence by employing the term, "business in the front, party in the back," there is some doubt as to whether it actually was invented as an attempt to fool potential employers as to the wearer's ability to be businesslike. Such doubts stem mostly from the fact that a vast majority of redneck men abhor the idea of a job at all and hence would never resort to such trickery in an attempt to secure gainful employment. 

Others believe that the mullet is descended from a long lost redneck ancestor's drunken attempt to cut his own hair, which resulted in his passing out before the job was done. Regardless, the hairdo remains a tell-tale sign that you are among rednecks of the most hardcore variety. 
You Think Cars That Fit in One Parking Spot Are for Yankees
One thing on which pretty much every redneck seems to agree is that bigger is better. If you'd like to use this idea as a test to determine whether you may be dealing with a redneck, look for the nearest thing they own that rolls. If you discover an unnecessarily large set of wheels or tires outfitting anything from their truck to their lawn mower, you are quite possibly dealing with someone of the redneck variety. 

What if there are no wheels present, you ask? No matter. Simply examine the hair of the women present. You see, any true redneck woman believes in the age old adage, "The higher the hair, the closer to God." If you find yourself among one or more women whose hair seems to be constantly striving to achieve new heights via the massive use of Aqua Net hair spray, you've found yourself among redneck kind indeed.


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/ashley-reign http://www.ranker.com/list/what-are-rednecks/ashley-reign
<![CDATA[Scary Stories of People Who Were Buried Alive]]> http://www.ranker.com/list/people-buried-alive/jacob-shelton
Many people's biggest fear (after giant spiders) is being buried alive. Not only is the thought of slowly running out of breath as you try in vain to scratch your way out of a wooden box absolutely horrifying, but realizing that your friends and family didn’t care enough to make sure you were actually dead before throwing you in the ground is an existential nightmare unto itself. You might think these are all historical tales of terror, but not all of the men and women on this list died before the modern era. There’s an unfortunate (and frankly, kind of scary) number of people who died after being buried alive in the 21st century as well. This list is full of some good ol’ fashioned nightmare fuel, so if you’re taphophobic (the fear of being buried alive), you might want to steer clear. Or better yet, face your fears and be healed by this list of people who were buried alive!

Below you’ll find a few happy endings, but more often than not, premature burial ends exactly how you think it will. If the thought of being trapped in a box and gasping for every breath is totally freaking you out right now (as it should!), then after reading this list get to work on your “I’m not dead!” cards and work out a secret code so your friends will know you’re alive even when though you've been sleeping for 48 hours. Have fun trying to get to sleep after reading about people being buried alive. We’re almost certain it won’t happen to you!
http://www.ranker.com/list/people-buried-alive/jacob-shelton,

Shakereh Khaleeli
In 1991, Shakereh Khaleeli - the wealthy daughter of one of India's more preeminent families, went missing. In May 1994, her skeletal remains were discovered by police in the courtyard of her own home. In an awful turn of events, her second husband had drugged her in her sleep, placed her on a mattress in a "coffin like box," and covered it with another mattress. She died unconscious, confined to a constricted space, and buried by the man whom she trusted implicitly. When Shakereh's skeletal remains were recovered and the mattress was removed, one of her hands was found clutching the mattress which lay below her. The side of the box was scratched with her nails, perhaps in an attempt to get out, probably suffocating in the last pangs of breath. 
Gale Benson
Benson was a London socialite and daughter of conservative MP Leonard Plugge who became mixed up with up with Racial Adjustment Action Society and its leader, Michael XOn the morning of January 2, 1972 a group of men, including Michael X, took Benson out for a walk outside their commune where they pushed her into a hole and attacked her with a cutlass. Her autopsy later found inhaled dirt in her lungs. It was alleged that Michael X had ordered her death because she was causing "mental strain" to her husband.
Jessica Lunsford
In 2005, Jessica Lunsford was abducted from her home in Homosassa, FL and taken to an empty trailer where she was held captive and raped by a convicted sex offender before he buried her in a hole approximately 2.5' deep and 2' circular, covered with leaves. Her body had undergone "moderate" to "severe" decomposition and, according to the publicly released autopsy reports, was skeletonized on two fingers that Lunsford had poked through the bags before suffocating to death.
Stephen Small
In 1987, an Illinois publishing and media heir named Stephen Small was kidnapped and buried alive in a makeshift wooden box near the town of Kankakee. His assailants, a 30-year-old man named Danny Edwards and his 26-year-old girlfriend, Nancy Rish, crafted a plan to abduct him and keep him immobile underground while asking for a $1 million ransom from his surviving family members. His kidnappers were able to provide the 39-year-old Mr. Small with minimal air, water, and light inside his homemade coffin via tubes, but he was left buried three feet under a sandy area and he suffocated after his breathing tube failed.
Man Buries Himself For Good Luck, Dies On Accident
Around 2010, an odd Internet craze began in Russia that found bloggers burying themselves alive. Some people thought it would bring them luck, others just hoped they would get likes.

The man in this story believed that burying himself alive for 24 hours would make him lucky for the rest of his life. With some help from a friend, he dug a grave outside the city of Blagoveshchensk, inserted a makeshift coffin complete with air piping, a single bottle of water, and a cell phone. Once the man got inside the casket, his friend covered him with nearly a foot of dirt and left. The man called his friend just once to say he was fine, but when the friend returned to relieve him in the morning, he was dead. It seems that an overnight rain might have blocked the air pipes and left the man to suffocate in his own casket.
Octavia Smith Hatcher
In the late 1800s, the city of Pikeville, KY was shaken with an unknown disease, and the most tragic case of all was that of Octavia Smith Hatcher. After her infant son passed away in January 1891, Octavia went into a bedridden depression where she gradually became very ill and was soon pronounced dead. In the 19th century, embalming wasn't the fad that it is today and, needless to say, when the rest of the sick townsfolk started to fall into comas and WAKE UP, Ocatavia's hubby freaked out and dug her up only to discover that he was too late. Octavia was reburied and her husband erected a lifelike monument over her grave site. The monument still stands today.
Essie Dunbar
In 1915, a 30-year-old South Carolinian named Essie Dunbar suffered a fatal attack of epilepsy - or so everyone thought. After declaring her dead, doctors placed Dunbar’s body in a coffin and scheduled her funeral for the next day so that her sister, who lived out of town, would still be able to pay her respects. But Dunbar's sister didn't travel fast enough; she arrived only to see the last clods of dirt thrown atop the grave. This didn’t sit well with Dunbar’s sister, who wanted to see Essie one last time. She ordered that the body be removed. When the coffin lid was opened, Essie sat up and smiled at all around her. She lived for another 47 years. No one gave Essie's sister guff about running late ever again.
Brazilian Man Crawls Out Of His Own Grave
For a brief moment, a woman visiting a family tomb in Brazil thought she was witnessing patient zero in a real life version of Night of the Living Dead when she witnessed a body emerging from a grave, waving its arms. After finally convincing the authorities to come to the cemetery to either rescue the man or start making headshots, police rescued the man who they believe to be a former city hall worker, who was involved in a fight in another part of the city, where he was badly beaten by attackers until he passed out and was taken to the cemetery to be buried alive.
Mina El Houari
We've all made bad decisions on bad dates, but Mina El Houari's beau might have made the worst decision ever. Mina, a 25-year-old French woman, travelled to Fez, Morocco for a first date and she collapsed onto the floor mid-date. So her date made an interesting choice and buried her in his backyardA few days passed before Mina’s family filed a missing persons report and flew to Morocco to try and find her. The Moroccan police were finally able to track down her murderer and raided his home, finding a shovel and muddy clothes.
Mrs. Boger
In 1893 a woman named Mrs. Boger suddenly died of unknown causes. Doctors confirmed her death, and she was promptly buried. The end. JK! This ends horribly.

A friend of Mrs. Boger's told her husband, Charles, that his wife had suffered from hysteria before he had met her, and it was possible that she hadn’t actually been dead. So Mr. Boger dug up his wife and found Mrs. Boger’s body turned over. Her shroud and robes were shredded to pieces and the glass of her coffin lid was broken all over her body. Her skin was bloodied and scratched, while her fingers were missing entirely. It was presumed that she chewed them off while attempting to escape. 


]]>
http://www.ranker.com/profile-of/jacob-shelton http://www.ranker.com/list/people-buried-alive/jacob-shelton