13 Things You Should NEVER Google
Horrible news: the Internet isn't all cute cats and viral videos. Oh, no. It's full of shock sites with very scary, gross, outrageous, disturbing, explicit, disgusting, offensive, horrible, upsetting, and otherwise gruesome imagery that people are frequently tricked into searching for on Google. If you're sitting there thinking "what should I Google," be sure you read through this list first, and help yourself avoid landing on any gross websites that you didn't even know you weren't mentally prepared for.
Spend any amount of time on sites like Fark or Reddit, or Internet forums, and you'll inevitably encounter suggestions that you search for some of the following terms, most of which sound largely innocent when judged by the names. But trust me... DON'T GOOGLE THEM (unless you turn on "safe search" first, that is). Most of these things, once seen, can never be unseen. From shock video sites and the worst shock sites, the Internet is a scary You've been warned...
NOTE: This page will remain SFW and informative only. Should your curiosity overcome you and you wish to actually see some of these terrible things, make sure you disable safe search on Google, and... um... happy hunting? Now, check out the list of things not to Google below.
- Photo: Metaweb (FB) / Fair use
In October of 2006, Nikki Catsouras perished in a car crash at age 18 in Lake Forest, California. (Catsouras had been driving her father's Porsche, before losing control of the vehicle and colliding with a toll booth.) The result of the crash was gruesome enough that Catsouras's parents were not asked to confirm her identity, but photographs of the scene were still taken, according to protocol.
California Highway Patrol Officers Aaron Reich and Thomas O'Donnell later admitted to leaking said photographs on to the internet by e-mailing them to friends. Despite the family's best efforts to remove them, photographs of the horrific Catsouras crash scene remain relatively easy to find on the Internet to this day. As intriguing as that sounds, you probably shouldn't Google them.
Brian Peppers is a registered sex offender from Ohio suffering from some kind of grim deformity. A photo of Peppers was taken in 1998 for Ohio's Electronic Sex Offender Registration and Notification system, after Peppers was convicted of "Gross Sexual Imposition." In 2005, this photo of Peppers made the internet rounds and became something of a meme, although at first many doubted the veracity of the image. (Snopes has since confirmed that it is, in fact, real.)
It has been speculated that Peppers peculiar appearance may be due to Apert Syndrome, a congenital disorder marked by malformations of the skull, or Crouzon Syndrome, a genetic disorder that causes malformations of the face and skull in embryos. If you're really curious but don't want to get creeped out, just imagine a guy with a super bloated face covered in gray paint.
- Photo: Noblevmy / Wikimedia Commons / CC BY 3.0
Meatspin.com is a website that features an embedded video of two men having gay sex. One of the men is "spinning around" atop the other man, giving rise to the website's name. The site also features a counter showing you, the viewer, how long you have managed to watch the action unfold.
In some ways, the concept is similar to the popular Nyan Cat meme, only in place of two men making love on one another, that site counts down how long you have watched a cartoon feline with rainbows coming out his backend.
4 Girls Finger PaintPhoto: Quinn Dombrowski / Flickr / CC BY-SA 2.0
"Oh, how nice, some young ladies expressing themselves artistically and enjoying an afternoon of... OH SWEET LORD NO!!!!" That would've been your reaction if someone had fooled you into Googling this. But now, I have spared you the trauma.In what was commonly referred to as a "sequel" of sorts to famed Internet shock video "2 Girls 1 Cup" (a video of two young women using each other like a port-a-potty), "4 Girls Finger Paint" features a quartet of women painting themselves and one another using their own f***s. Not grossed out yet? Don't worry! They eventually find a way to work some vomit in there as well.
Lemon PartyPhoto: Andre Karwath / Wikimedia Commons / CC BY-SA 2.5
A site called "Lemonparty.org" features a video clip of 3 elderly gentlemen in a bed together kissing and then engaging in oral sex. Because of its innocuous sounding name (which is also shared by a "frivolous" Canadian political party!), Lemonparty is one of the most popular gross out memes online.
This is one of the few items on this list to receive any kind of real mainstream attention. It even scored a subtle mention on an episode of "30 Rock":
Harlequin FetusPhoto: J. Bland Sutton / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain
Admittedly, if someone tells you to Google any term with the word "fetus" right there in it, you can sort of tell they're up to no good. But this is extreme, even by "fetal photo" standards. The term refers to a baby born with the congenital skin disease ichthyosis. By thickening the layer of keratin in a fetus' skin, it causes rough diamond-shaped "scales" to appear, limiting the infant's movement and making it susceptible to all sorts of infections.
The disorder is always fatal, and typically infants born suffering from severe ichthyosis don't survive for more than a few days. Most of the gross out internet things on this list can be fun to trick people into viewing, but harlequin fetuses are incredibly depressing.