Watchworthy
276 voters

The Best W. C. Fields Quotes

882 votes 276 voters 23.5k views19 items

List RulesMust be a famous or well-known quote. If a quote is cut off you can hover over the text to see the full quote.

A list of the best W. C. Fields quotes. This list is arranged by which famous W. C. Fields quotes have received the most votes, so only the greatest W. C. Fields quotes are at the top of the list. All the most popular quotes from W. C. Fields should be listed here, but if any were missed you can add more at the end of the list. This list includes notable W. C. Fields quotes on various subjects, many of which are inspirational and thought provoking.

This list answers the questions, "What are the best W. C. Fields quotes?" and "What is the most famous W. C. Fields quote?"

You can see what subjects these historic W. C. Fields quotes fall under displayed to the right of the quote. Be sure to vote so your favorite W. C. Fields saying won't fall to the bottom of the list.
...more
Discover your next favorite show with the ultimate Streaming TV guide and watchlist.Try our free app
  • 1
    60
    9

    It was a woman who drove me to drink, and I never had the courtesy to thank her for it.

    W. C. Fields
  • 2
    50
    10

    Start off everyday with a simple smile and get it over with.

    W. C. Fields
  • 3
    55
    15

    A rich man is nothing but a poor man with money.

    W. C. Fields
  • 4
    56
    22

    Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water.

    W. C. Fields
  • 5
    55
    23

    I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

    W. C. Fields
  • 6
    39
    14

    I once spent a year in Philadelphia, I think it was on a Sunday.

    W. C. Fields
  • 7
    32
    12

    Somebody left the cork out of my lunch.

    W. C. Fields
  • 8
    29
    10

    I never drink water. I'm afraid it will become habit-forming.

    W. C. Fields
  • 9
    20
    2
    david-heilman added

    Boy, if you were any sharper you'd cut yourself.

  • 10
    27
    10

    I never drink water; that is the stuff that rusts pipes.

    W. C. Fields
  • 11
    37
    22

    I never vote for anyone. I always vote against.

    W. C. Fields
  • 12
    30
    16
    MarkJStout added

    Always Carry a Flagon of Whiskey in Case of Snakebite and Furthermore Always Carry a Small Snake. Read More at Http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/w/w_c_fields.html#biU3LSzX4rPb68ug.99

  • 13
    23
    8

    The cost of living has gone up another dollar a quart.

    W. C. Fields
  • 14
    26
    12

    Remember, a dead fish can float downstream, but it takes a live one to swim upstream.

    W. C. Fields
  • 15
    17
    5
    andrew-weitz added

    From time to time there appear on the face of the earth men of rare and consummate excellence, who dazzle us by their virtue, and whose outstanding qualities shed a stupendous light. Like those extraordinary stars of whose origins we are ignorant, and of whose fate, once they have vanished, we know even less, such men have neither forebears nor descendants: they are the whole of their race.

    Jean de La Bruyère
  • 16
    13
    5

    My heart is a bargain today. Will you take it?

    W. C. Fields
  • 17
    22
    16

    The world is getting to be such a dangerous place, a man is lucky to get out of it alive.

    W. C. Fields
  • 18
    15
    16

    You can't trust water: Even a straight stick turns crooked in it.

    W. C. Fields
  • 19
    17
    21

    Show me a great actor and I'll show you a lousy husband. Show me a great actress, and you've seen the devil.

    W. C. Fields