257 voters

Dennis Reynolds's Big Ideas, Ranked

Updated May 23, 2019 1.2k votes 257 voters 28.5k views19 items
Ah, Dennis Reynolds. Narcissist, potential serial killer, and a solid contributor to the countless schemes and plots the gang dreams up on It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia. The show wouldn’t exist if it weren’t for Glenn Howerton and it certainly wouldn’t be as dark as it is without Dennis. 
From his disastrous and stalkery D.E.N.N.I.S. dating system to his thing for teabagging guys, Dennis is an enigma wrapped inside a riddle stuffed inside a deeply troubled psychotic mind. Dennis’s ideas on Always Sunny usually take abrupt, weird, and vengeful turns. When he and Dee stalk the Waitress, he’s disappointed that they aren’t actually going to kill her and chop her up.  
On top of the sociopathic tendencies, on Always Sunny Dennis talks his sister Dee into doing many humiliating things like posing as serial killer bait, setting her up with men with lower self esteem than hers, and calling her a bird every chance he gets. He’s also not afraid to pop off his shirt and show off his pink dime-sized nipples any time during one of the Always Sunny schemes. Through 11 seasons and counting, Dennis can be counted upon to flash his fish-belly white torso at the drop of some old rat cheese.  
Which Always Sunny Dennis scheme, idea, or tendency is your favorite? Vote up those golden gods to the top of the list.
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  • 1

    When He Invented the D.E.N.N.I.S. System

    Video: YouTube
    Season 5, Episode 10: “The D.E.N.N.I.S. System” 
    The tenets of Dennis’s classic and horrible dating strategy are:
    emonstrate Value 
    ngage Physically (this is where Mac comes in) 
    urturing Dependence 
    eglect Emotionally 
    nspire Hope 
    eparate Entirely 
    Dee challenges him to re-D.E.N.N.I.S. a woman he formerly D.E.N.N.I.S.-ed. Meanwhile, the gang convinces Dee she’s being D.E.N.N.I.S.-ed by her boyfriend Ben, who’s really just a nice guy. The gang attempts to use the D.E.N.N.I.S. system, but fail miserably when they go rogue in their interpretation of the system.
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  • 2

    When He Tried to Make a Difference After Watching An Inconvenient Truth

    Photo: Metaweb / CC-BY
    Season 3, Episode 1: “The Gang Finds a Dumpster Baby”  
    Dennis gets “punked out by a couple of hippies” when he goes to the dump to look for recycling. Instead of trying to reduce his carbon footprint, Dennis sets out for revenge. In order to get in good with the activist hippies, he offers them copious amounts of weed, convinces their leader to chain himself to a tree, and then does 'shrooms and has sex with the guy’s girlfriend. He wraps up his environmental work by showing up the next day to release the rain-soaked peace activist and then letting the tree get cut down as he tells the guy, “I banged your girlfriend.”
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  • 3

    When He Tried to Find Dee a Man with No Self-Esteem

    Photo: flickr / CC0

    Season 9, Episode 1: “The Gang Broke Dee”  

    Dee hits rock bottom after being the butt of the gang’s jokes and decides to give up. The gang is bummed because they can no longer insult her, as she beats them to the punchline. What are some assh*les to do?

    Dennis proposes to fix her up with a guy with even worse self-esteem issues that she has!
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  • 4

    When He Wrote a Tale of Redemption Told Through His Erotic Travels

    Video: YouTube
    Season 4, Episode 9: “Dennis Reynolds: An Erotic Life”  
    Dennis's memoir went missing before he could unleash it upon the world in a fiery explosion, but fear not, for it was found in the crawl space. His stories involve being the personal sexual advisor to Jon Bon Jovi and waking up in a rehab facility with Christ’s stigmata. With Mac’s help, Dennis attempts to make those claims true so he won’t end up looking like a jerk in front of Oprah like “that Million Little Pieces guy.” He ends up in a psych ward of his own imagination where Sinbad makes him his b*tch and his fellow ward buddy is Rob Thomas of Matchbox 20. Because of course.
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