• Graveyard Shift

Bartenders Tell The Wildest Stories Of When They Had To Cut Someone Off

List RulesVote up the most chaotic cut-off stories.

Bartender stories are the best. Since they deal with such a wide variety of people under some of the strangest circumstances, everyone who's worked in a bar is bound to come out of it with a wild tale at some point. From belligerent drunkards to inebriated imbeciles, hilarious hijinks to absolute horror stories, here are stories of bartenders who finally had enough, and had to cut off their customers from downing any more drinks before things got even more out of hand!

  • 1
    217 VOTES

    Happy Birthday, Here's Your Alcohol Poisoning

    Posted by u/throwaaaawwaay:

    Best time I cut off a customer:

    It was this guy's 21st, and he was going for 21 shots... He and his friends were polite so the bartender was cool with it. He got somewhere in the teens before he started puking in the sink while I was in there peeing. I followed him back to his friends, told them what happened, and said that it was time for him to go. He tried to swing at me when I was explaining, but fell in the process...

    So to break the mood, I said, "Dude, so many people get kicked out fighting. You can use this opportunity to crowd-surf out of the bar." He and his buddies start laughing, and we all carried him out of the bar like he was crowd-surfing at a concert.

    Closing time?
  • 2
    296 VOTES

    You Spin Me Right 'Round, Baby

    Posted by a former Redditor:

    We decided to let her finish her drink before we cut her off. After a few sips, she got real ornery and called me over, angrily demanding that I serve her a drink. Confused, since she had three-fourths of a cocktail sitting in front of her, I picked her drink up, spun around, and put it back down in front of her. "Thank you," she said with a bite to her tone, and took a sip.

    Not a minute later do I hear her b*tching again that we won't serve her. Same deal, nearly full drink right before her eyes, so I do another pirouette with her cocktail in hand and drop it back in front of her. I must have done this a dozen times times, and she never once realized it was the same drink. My only regret is not charging her each time I did it. 

    Closing time?
  • 3
    246 VOTES

    Unluck Of The Irish

    Posted by u/schwab002:

    I work in an Irish Bar, and on St. Patrick's Day this past year, our owner tells us before the madness starts that it's okay by him to have some drinks to celebrate, be merry, and help deal with the drunks and madness better. I don't think he was thinking straight, but it was a nice gesture. Still, he probably should have at least set a limit... a low limit.

    Anyway, one of the bartenders is taking shots with some customers while making drinks for herself and other customers, and gets pretty darn drunk by 3 pm. The rest of the staff tries to cut her off, but she continues to take shots with customers to the point where she can barely serve anyone anymore. The place is completely packed, people are asking her for drinks, and she's just making them whatever she wants (mostly beers, simple well cocktails). One customer starts yelling at her that she's not going to pay for a drink that she didn't order, and the bartender flips out and starts screaming at her, eventually throwing a drink right in the customer's face. She then immediately starts a fist fight with another bartender who is trying to smooth things over with the wronged customer, and threatens to jab our server with the drink-order-receipt spike.

    The only person our bouncer kicked out that day was our bartender.

    She didn't even lose her job because the owner is dumb, felt it was his fault he allowed her to drink.

    Closing time?
  • 4
    382 VOTES

    You May Now Boink The Bridesmaid

    Posted by u/notnicholas:

    I bartended weddings in a hotel ballroom in a smaller, rural town.

    At one particular wedding, the groom and groomsmen went out to the parking lot to annihilate the beers that were stashed in the groom's truck. The wedding party had already cashed in four kegs by 9:30 pm, and the father of the bride, who was paying for it all, declined buying any more.

    Anyway, all of the groomsmen eventually came back in to the reception/dance. The bride storms out to the parking lot when she sees everyone but her new hubby return, then promptly returns, red in the face, makeup smeared, and bawling her eyes out...  she screams at her bridesmaids to "go get her out of that truck!"

    Bridesmaids go out and drag another bridesmaid out of the truck and into the hotel bathroom to help her get back into her dress properly. Groom strolls up to the bar and orders some Jack while tucking his shirt in.

    We closed the bar at that exact moment.

    Closing time?