Cartoons Darkwing Duck's 50 Most Hilarious Introductory Lines  

Cynthia Griffith
10.2k votes 1.1k voters 31.3k views 54 items

List Rules Vote up Darkwing Duck's most clever catchphrases.

Darkwing Duck was one of the most underappreciated television shows in the history of animation. It was riddled with pop culture references and witty little one liners. It shared capes with comic book characters and sounded off on some of the most relevant pop culture topics of yesteryear. Who could forget the classic characters, the ones who were brave enough to be flawed in a cartoon network that all too often embraced stereotypes and impossible realities? There has only ever been one Darkwing. His daring will forever be remembered.

While there were several shining moments that made this cartoon great, none were quite so memorable as the intro lines from Darkwing Duck. The way the masked crusader introduced himself was always different, yet always the same. His famous, “I am the terror that flaps in the night,” followed by a beloved anecdote that only Darkwing himself could concoct will forever be remembered. Some of the lines he used were reflective of the times. Others were reflective of the episode itself (see the one about the flying saucer). All of them were classic Darkwing - wit, humor, sarcasm and a side of current events.  

Scrolling through these brainy one line Darkwing Duck introduction captions is guaranteed to be a nostalgic experience. Does anyone else remember back when there was a cash line and a check line? Can anyone else recall a time when people wore trousers and musicians had a hit parade? Here are some flashback Darkwing Duck theme phrases guaranteed to jog your memory. Which ones are your favorite?

list ordered by

1
412 67
I Am The Batteries That Are Not Included.

2
306 57
I Am The Wrong Number That Wakes You At 3 A.M.

3
310 64
I Am The Low Rating That Cancels Your Program.

4
288 62
I Am The Weirdo Who Sits Next To You On The Bus.

5
278 60
I Am The Check Writer In The Cash Only Line.

6
206 33
I Am The Stain That Can’t Be Rubbed Out.

7
235 45
I Am The Fast Food That Comes Back To Haunt You.

8
276 67
I’m The Neurosis That Requires A $500 An Hour Shrink.

9
238 56
I Am The Grade Curve That Gives You An F.

10
248 61
I Am The Ingrown Toenail On The Foot Of Crime.

11
194 45
I Am The Repair Man Who Tells You Your Warranty Has Run Out.

12
185 43
I Am The Zit That Forms When You’ve Got A Really Big Date.

13
218 64
I Am The Chill That Runs Up Your Spine.

14
197 54
I Am The Rhinestones On The Jump Suit Of Justice.

15
186 50
I Am The Auditor Who Wants To Look At Your Books.

16
176 52
I Am The Jailer Who Throws Away The Key. I Am… Feeling Really Stupid. Boy I Hate It When I’m Early.

17
173 51
I Am The Widget Missing From The Easy To Assemble Swing Set.

18
159 44
I’m The Surprise In Your Cereal Box.

19
155 42
I Am The Combination Lock On The Vault Of Justice.

20
145 37
I Am The Bubble Gum That Clings To Your Shoe.

21
160 53
I Am The Pin That Will Burst Your Bubble.

22
139 43
I Am The $10 Service Charge On All Return Checks.

23
137 43
I Am The Raspberry Seed You Can’t Floss Out.

24
138 44
I Am The Single Career Man All Women Want To Date.

25
124 39
I Am The Cloud That Rains On Your Hit Parade.

26
119 40
I Am The Hair In The Lens Of Your Projector.

27
108 37
I Am The Flea You Cannot Flick.

28
106 37
I Am The Metal Key On The Sardine Can Of Justice.

29
109 40
I Am The Editor That Leaves You On The Cutting Room Floor.

30
99 33
I Am The Principal You Were Sent To See.

31
108 40
I Am The Quality Time That Ruins Your Playtime.

32
112 43
I Am The Switch That Derails Your Train.

33
117 48
I Am…The Smallest, Weakest Thing In The Whole Place. And I Am Also Outta Here!

34
101 38
I Am The Butter That Burns In Your Pan.

35
96 35
I Am The Lollipop That Sticks In Your Hair.

36
109 46
I Am The Termite That Devours Your Floorboards.

37
104 45
I Am The Scourge That Pecks At Your, Uh, Your Nightmares, Ummm…

38
82 29
I Am The Eraser That Rubs Out The Typos Of Crime.

39
90 36
I Am The Pit Bull That Bites The Ankle Of Crime.

40
83 33
I Am The Water Balloon That Lands Right On Your Head.

41
92 42
I Am The Pestilent Blister That Bursts In Your Boot.

42
80 34
I Am The Blown Fuse That Blacks You Out.

43
82 37
I Am The Limestone That Petrifies Your Bones.

44
78 35
I Am The Clock Cleaner Who Will Ring Your Chimes.

45
73 33
I Am The Muddy Shoes That Track The Linoleum Of Crime.

46
79 39
I Am The Icky Bug That Crawls Up Your Trouser Leg.

47
78 39
I Am The Spider Who Nips At Your Neck.

48
79 43
I Am The Little Mouse That Eats Your Cheese.

49
74 49
I Am The Moth That Seeks Your Porch Light.

50
56 37
I Am The Number 90 Sunblock That Will Stop Your Burn.