Many people, including your boss, your partner, your parents and your siblings, are very easy to pick gifts for (and even if they're not, there's plenty of lists of gifts for guys and such out there...like on a site of lists of stuff). But often times when buying presents- after you've made your way down the list of co-workers, neighbors, and the like- you'll inevitably discover that you're missing something special for one of the most important people in your life: your slutty friend. Buying presents for your sluttiest friends can be a complicated ordeal, but this list of presents for your slutty friends is here to help.
Whether your slutty friend serves as wingman or woman, the butt of your jokes or the scandalous storyteller that drags you from the doldrums of married life, your best slutty friend deserves something extra special. Birthdays, anniversaries, holidays, Mondays...there's always a good time to think about buying presents for your slutty friends.
What are the best gifts for a slutty friend? Where can you buy presents for sluts? Keep in mind, when thinking about the greatest gifts for sluts, that there are many self-identified sluts in the world who are proudly owning their status and deserve to receive presents that fit their slutty status.
Sex in a Can
There are so many things about Sex in a Can than can be said and shouldn't. Available from the good people at Fleshlight, the interior of the innocuous looking beer cans is a cavalcade of simulated flesh and is available in...well, let's just say it: oral, anal and vaginal. Unless someone already knows what they're looking for when entering the bedroom, any of your slutty gentlemen friends could keep this on their bedside table without anyone being the wiser.
"Wait, Was That Slutty?" Hand Sanitizer
Your friend probably has enough experience with the question to answer it on their own, but there's no harm in supplying your slutty friend with a little anti-bacterial gel to fight off whatever they've been touching lately. The good folks at BlueQ don't stop at answering the question of "Was that slutty?", they also offer "Thanks for holding my hair back", "You Nasty", "What the hell?", and simply "Ew." sanitizers for the convenience of your ho-ish friend.
If you've never had your undies stolen by your one-night stand, you're a lucky lady or gentleman. If you've never had to dash quickly from a room without the luxury of time to figure out what crevice of the room (bath, living, bed) your pantaloons have ended up, well, maybe you're not a slut. If you are a slut, however, you may need to dash off to your next appointment without all your undergarments. Enter disposable underwear, a discreet, trashable, temporary article of clothing that could make the difference between basic presentation and Basic Instinct.Buy disposable pantaloons here.
If you're buying for a slutty female friend, chances are they have had/will have their fair share of one-night stands and walks of shame. Why not equip them with a respite from the heels they surely wore out to the club the night before and gift them with a pair of After Flats, the rollable, foldable shoes that fit in your purse. Yeah, she's still going to be walking into the daylight in her mini skirt, but at least she can walk a little faster past those who might be throwing shade in the sunlight.