178 voters

The Most Inappropriate Quotes From 'Good Boys'

Updated August 21, 2019 1.3k votes 178 voters 8.0k views25 items

If you've seen the movie, we need you to vote for the best Good Boys quotes. This raunchy R-rated comedy is packed with funny lines, courtesy of writers Gene Stupnitsky and Lee Eisenberg. These funny men cut their teeth working behind the scenes on The Office, so they know how to craft silly one-liners. In fact, the movie is packed wall-to-wall with them. You'll be dropping Good Boys quotes to your friends for weeks after seeing it.

The story follows three sixth grade best friends -- Max (Jacob Tremblay), Thor (Brady Noon), and Lucas (Keith L. Williams). They're invited to a "kissing party" being thrown by one of the cool kids in school. The problem is that they don't know how to kiss. To solve this dilemma, they hatch a scheme to use a drone belonging to Max's father to spy on a teenage neighbor and her boyfriend. When the girl, Hannah (Molly Gordon), catches on and swipes the drone, a comic misadventure begins, one that involves stolen substances, a bunch of frat boys, and a paintball marker, among other things. 

Vote up the most memorable Good Boys quotes from the list below, regardless of which character speaks them.

  • 1


    Lucas (to a bearded old man watching them fight): What the f*ck are you staring at, Gandalf?

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  • 2

    Fox and Squirrel

    Max: We need to get rid of the drugs.

    Thor: We can throw it in the forest.

    Lucas: It's a sex drug. What if a fox eats it and tries to f*ck a squirrel? It'll kill him!

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  • 3


    Lucas (watching an adult film): How many husbands does she have?

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  • 4

    Spy On My Neighbor

    Max: We could spy on my neighbor. She's a total nymphomaniac. 

    Lucas: She starts fires?

    Max: No, she's a nymphomaniac. Someone who has sex on land and sea.

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