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The Best Ralph Wiggum Quotes of All Time

Updated October 26, 2018 2.2k votes 274 voters 14.9k views25 items

He may be Springfield's dumbest resident, but the best Ralph Wiggum quotes show us why we love him so much anyways. From classic lines like "Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!" to "The doctor said I wouldn't have so many nosebleeds if I kept my finger outta there," let's take a look at the greatest Ralph Wiggum quotes in Simpsons history, ranked by your votes. 

Most of the funniest lines from Ralph Wiggum poke fun at how stupid he is: "Me fail English? That’s unpossible." However, there are a few memorable quotes from Ralph during the time he had a crush on Lisa that are actually quite cute (and eventually heartbreaking): "Let's be friends. It says 'bee,' and there's a picture of a bee on it!"

Whatever your favorite Ralph Wiggum quotes are, vote them up on the list below so they will climb closer to the top.

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  • Unpossible
    Photo: Fox
    1

    Unpossible

    Ralph: Me fail English? That’s unpossible.

    171
    8
    Love this quote?
  • Super Nintendo Chalmers
    Photo: Fox
    2

    Super Nintendo Chalmers

    Skinner: And, for the first time ever, our computer lab actually has a computer in it.
    Ralph: Hi,  Lisa! Hi, Super Nintendo Chalmers!

    172
    15
    Love this quote?
  • The Leprechaun
    Photo: Fox
    3

    The Leprechaun

    Ralph: That's where I saw the Leprechaun. He tells me to burn things.

    129
    17
    Love this quote?
  • Like Cat Food
    Photo: Fox
    4

    Like Cat Food

    Ralph: My cat’s breath smells like cat food.

    107
    11
    Love this quote?