Entertainment

The Funniest Quotes From 'Scrooged'  

Movie and TV Quotes
59 votes 15 voters 15 items

Which of these Scrooged quotes is the best? That's what we are here to decide with the help of your votes. There have been numerous adaptations of A Christmas Carol over the years. There's just something about watching an old miser get visited by three spirits and learn the meaning of Christmas that has resonated with generations. For people who grew up in the 1980s, one of the most pivotal adaptations comes in the form of the hit comedy Scrooged, starring Bill Murray. This time, Murray plays a TV executive who needs to learn the meaning of Christmas before it's too late. Check out the best Scrooged quotes to remember why you need to pop this classic into the VCR (or find it on a streaming service) as soon as possible. 

Scrooged offers plenty of that classic Bill Murray hilarity people have come to adore. There are plenty of hilarious and funny lines throughout the film, such as when Murray's character Frank Cross is trying to get everything set up and says, "We're gonna need champagne for 250 people, and send the stuff that you send to me. Don't send the stuff that I send to other people." There's also the great line, "No, you are a hallucination brought on by alcohol. Russian vodka poisoned by Chernobyl!"

Which lines puts the biggest smile on your face? The best Scrooged movie quotes are right here for your enjoyment. 

Twelve Sharp Knives is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list The Funniest Quotes From 'Scrooged'
Photo:  Paramount Pictures
1
Twelve Sharp Knives

Frank Cross: I never liked a girl well enough to give her twelve sharp knives.

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Schmuck is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list The Funniest Quotes From 'Scrooged'
Photo:  Paramount Pictures
2
Schmuck

Frank Cross: The Jews taught me this great word, "schmuck." I was a schmuck, and now I'm not a schmuck!

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Garden Slugs is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list The Funniest Quotes From 'Scrooged'
Photo:  Paramount Pictures
3
Garden Slugs

Ghost of Christmas Past: Let's face it, Frank. Garden slugs got more out of life than you.

Frank Cross: Yeah? Name one!

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Nipples is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list The Funniest Quotes From 'Scrooged'
Photo:  Paramount Pictures
4
Nipples

Frank Cross: I want to see her nipples.

Censor Lady: But this is a Christmas show.

Frank Cross: Well, I'm sure Charles Dickens would have wanted to see her nipples.

Carpenter: You can barely see them nipples.

Frank Cross: See? And these guys are really looking.

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