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The Best Scruffy Quotes From 'Futurama'

February 24, 2020 3.1k votes 376 voters 16.6k views24 items

The best Scruffy character quotes from Futurama prove that he is the unsung hero of the Planet Express crew and doesn't always get the love and appreciation he deserves. Scruffy... the janitor. Let's clean up this list a bit by voting up the best Scruffy lines of all time. 

Scruffy was capable of some truly amazing one-liners, such as the subtle but brilliant, "My job. Toilets 'n boilers, boilers 'n toilets. Plus that one boilin' toilet. Fire me if'n you dare." However, he was also occasionally a voice of reason within the dysfuntional delivery company. He had a moment of utter clarity with, "The candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long. Mmhm." 

Funny Scruffy quotes are not hard to find. But which one is the best? Vote up your favorites if'n you dare.

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  • 1

    On Break

    Scruffy: I'm on break.

    [He eats a potato chip.]

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  • 2

    My Job

    Scruffy: My job. Toilets 'n boilers, boilers 'n toilets. Plus that one boilin' toilet. Fire me if'n you dare.

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  • 3

    The Candle

    Scruffy: The candle that burns twice as bright burns half as long. Mmhm.

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  • 4

    $300 Haircuts

    Scruffy: Scruffy's goin' to get one of them $300 haircuts, this one's lost its pizzazz.

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