Entertainment

The Most Hilarious Quotes From 'Stuber'  

Movie and TV Quotes
77 votes 16 voters 25 items

If you've seen the movie, we want you to vote for the best Stuber quotes. This is a daunting task, given that the movie has hilarious one-liners from start to finish. The screenplay by Tripper Clancey is packed with funny lines -- some raunchy, others more observant of human nature. It's probably a safe bet that there were a few moments of improvisation between the actors during filming, too. After viewing the film, you'll be making Stuber quotes to your friends for weeks. 

Directed by Michael Dowse, the movie stars Dave Bautista as Vic Manning, a cop hunting down the dealer who eliminated his partner. In an incident of comedic inconvenience, Vic gets a tip about where the dealer will make his next big drop on the exact same day that he has eye surgery. Because he can't see very well, he has to call an Uber to transport him around. Enter Stu (Kumail Nanjiani), the meek, mild-mannered driver who gets sucked into all sorts of violent and scary situations. As with most buddy comedies, the two men don't initially like each other, which leads to a barrage of cutting dialogue.

Vote up the most memorable Stuber quotes from the list below, regardless of which character says them. 

Ryan Gosling is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list The Most Hilarious Quotes From 'Stuber'
Photo:  20th Century Fox
1 6 VOTES
Ryan Gosling

(Stu attempts to embarrass a criminal by taking his phone and posting on Twitter)

Stu: I...love...Ryan Gosling. So...hot-t-t-t-t.

 

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This Isn't 'Jaws' is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list The Most Hilarious Quotes From 'Stuber'
Photo:  20th Century Fox
2 5 VOTES
This Isn't 'Jaws'

Stu: I've got an idea. I'm gonna throw this propane tank at them. You shoot it and it will blow up their car. 

Vic Manning: This isn't f*cking Jaws!

Stu: Exactly! Just like Jaws

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He Kidnapped Me is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list The Most Hilarious Quotes From 'Stuber'
Photo:  20th Century Fox
3 5 VOTES
He Kidnapped Me

Nicole Manning: So, how do you know my dad?

Stu: He kidnapped me. We killed some people.

Nicole Manning: Huh.

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Baby Gun is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list The Most Hilarious Quotes From 'Stuber'
Photo:  20th Century Fox
4 6 VOTES
Baby Gun

Vic Manning: It's a baby gun. It allows you to fire it while crying.

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