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The Greatest Zapp Brannigan Quotes From Futurama

Updated September 20, 2018 6.0k votes 886 voters 40.3k views25 items

Did you know Zapp Brannigan was based on Captain Kirk? Brannigan is arrogant, oblivious, and rude, but that's exactly why we love him on Futurama. Here are the greatest Zapp Brannigan quotes of all time, ranked by your votes.

When Leela told Brannigan it was a mistake to sleep with him, Zapp replied with, "A sexy mistake." Many of Zapp's best quotes prove just how dumb he is. Take the time he was introducing himself, for example: "I am the man with no name. Zapp Brannigan at your service." Another great Zapp Brannigan quote involves him demonstrating his competency as a captain: "When I'm in command, every mission is a suicide mission."

Vote up your favorite Zapp Branigan quotes below, no matter what episode or season they are from. If you notice a good one is missing, add it to the list along with an image!

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  • 5

    Deeply Confusing

    Zapp Brannigan: That young man fills me with hope. Plus some other emotions which are weird and deeply confusing.

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  • 6

    Congratulations, Captain

    Zapp Brannigan: Don't blame yourself, Kif. We were doomed from the start. I guess all that remains now is for the captain to go down with the ship.

    Kif: That's surprisingly noble of you, sir.

    Zapp Brannigan: No, it's noble of you, Kif. As of now, you're in command. Congratulations, Captain.

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  • 7

    Hard And Fast

    Zapp Brannigan: Brannigan's Law is like Brannigan's love: hard and fast.

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  • 8

    A Steak House

    Zapp Brannigan: She's built like a steak house, but she handles like a Bistro.

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