Every year, a cadre of weirdoes, freaks, deviants, hippies, would-be circus performers, drug aficionados, spiritual wanderers, itinerant sexual spirits, pyromaniacs, and squares trying to escape the shackles of every day life descend on a sparse flat in the Nevada desert desert for eight days of anarchic communal living. Burning Man isn’t just another festival, it’s an experiment in temporary society that’s grounded by a set of principles set upon the event's inception in 1986 (at least in theory; it may also be a playground for the wealthy). While it seems to be in direct opposition to the concept of the festival, there is Burning Man etiquette.
One of the biggest points organizers stress is to leave the desert the way you found it, and this deceptively simple idea has branched out into a twisting garden of rules for Burning Man that have to be followed in order to ensure everyone’s good time. The foundational principle of "don't f*ck things up" applies to almost every facet of life.
If you’ve ever seen footage of this extravagant celebration of mutated art cars, naked dancers, and fire fire fire, you’ve probably thought to yourself, “Are there rules at Burning Man? Or is it a parched state of chaos in which fornicators and pyros set out to eradicate the fabricated meaning imposed upon our natural state of nihilism?"
You better believe there are rules, jabroni. Like any festival, Burning Man has to concede some of its freewheeling status to keep everyone safe and local government happy. Some Burning Man rules are as simple as cleaning up after yourself and being nice. That's easy enough. It's the unspoken rules can be a bit confusing. If you’re planning on attending Burning Man and don’t know what to expect, it would behoove you to learn the secret laws of the land so you don’t make yourself look like a fool in front of seasoned Burners.
Study these strange rules at Burning Man that you didn’t know people have to follow and get weird with it.
Bring Bacon If You Want To Make Friends
It seems counterintuitve—you'd think the environmentally conscious people (re: hippies) that populate Burning Man would be horrified by the idea of eating an animal—but Burners freaking love bacon. Maybe it's the salt, which helps stave off dehydration, but bacon is one of the festival's biggest commodities. If you're looking to make friends, offering them bacon is a solid way to break the ice.
Feathers Are Item Non Grata
Hearkening back to the "leave no trace policy," feathers are a big no no when it comes to Burning Man. Your feather boa may look really dumb cool, but when it gets caught by the wind on the playa, the feathers will inevitably detach and start blowing all over the place, thus ruining the desert's classic, non feathery ecosystem. Feathers and glitter are two of the hardest things to clean up and remove, so if you bring any, expect to get some major side-eye from Burning Man veterans.
Don't Use The Hot Springs!
Let's set the scene: You just danced your pants off in the middle of a pile of dirt and you're covered in the thick, glistening sweat-filth tar that comes with taking drugs in the desert. You want to relax. Common sense says that you should take a dip in one of the many hot springs in the Black Rock Desert, right? WRONG.
You'll probably die. According to one Burner, in 1994 they witnessed a dog boiled alive in one of the hottest springs.
You Don't Get To Choose Your Own Playa Name
That's right: out on the Playa, you don't go by your real name. You need a name specifically for Burning Man, and you don't even get to choose it. "Originally spawned by the need for unique names on the staff’s 2-way radios, playa names have become almost ubiquitous, and are sometimes used to provide an individual with an 'alternate' personality or persona. Playa names are traditionally given to a person, rather than taken on," reads the Burning Man glossary.