Culture

The Most Dangerous Sex Positions

If you’ve taken a peek inside any magazine that haunts the racks at your local grocery store, you’ve probably noticed about a million tips on how to make your love life about a million times better. From Cosmo to Men’s Health, everyone has a magic position that they’re sure you and your significant other are going to love. What those publications fail to tell you is that most of the sexual positions that they think you should start using are tantamount to a minefield. One wrong step (or thrust) and you could end up in the ER with a cracked penis or exploding vagina, and nobody wants that. Before you try out your amateur trapeze act in the bedroom (or swimming pool, depending on which position you’ve got your eye on), read this list of the most dangerous sexual positions so you know what you’re getting into.

Extreme sex positions are all well and good, but the truth of the matter is, if you’re not in peak physical condition, or if you’re just not ready for the kind of sex that you’d expect to see at any Crossfit gym, just stick to what you know. No matter how much you may want to try them, the dangerous sex positions on this list aren’t for beginners.

Vote up the sex position that you think seems the most dangerous, and remember to stay safe out there.
  • 9
    647 VOTES

    69

    Despite all of the wonderful T-shirt slogans that it inspired, 69 can result in pink eye. According to a 2007 study published in the International Journal of STD and AIDS, researchers found that nine percent of people studied were infected with chlamydial conjunctivitis after their partner ejaculated into their eye.
  • 10
    504 VOTES

    Stairway to Heaven

    This dangerous move is a variation on the Hot Seat with the lady sitting on top of the guy while he sits on one of the stairs of a staircase! (Sorry if you only have a single story home or your steps are outside.) Stairs are good for resting so you don't over exert yourself and the hand rail offers extra support and lifting leverage.

    Remember guys, if she’s on top, you have less control over the in and out motion, and you’re more likely to slip out of her.
  • 11
    492 VOTES

    The Butter Churner

    First of all, what is happening here? It looks like the guy is trying to break the woman in half. Supposedly, this position is great because the woman receives an extra rush of blood to her head and increases her ecstasy but it can also put stress on her neck and probably pull a muscle. Worst case scenario, you'll end up with a girlfriend in a neck brace.

  • 12
    450 VOTES

    The Wheelbarrow

    I don't care how strong you are, you cannot hold yourself up for that long while also having sex. THAT IS TOO MUCH EFFORT. Guys, don't drop your lady friend while you're doing this move or you'll never get to try it again.