Uncovering Steve McQueen's Disturbingly Abusive Past (Which Included Forcing His Wives To Do Drugs)

Steve McQueen was the face of "cool" and "danger" in Hollywood in the 1960s, taking on roles in action films like The Great EscapeBullitt, and The Thomas Crown Affair. His onscreen persona matched his off-screen behavior; he lived a fast life full of motorcycles, women, and illicit substances. He was allegedly nicer to his motorcycles than to his three wives, a notion the relationship between Steve McQueen and Neile Adams supports. Adams outlined years of physical and emotional abuse in her memoir, My Husband, My Friend: A Memoir.

Adams was not the only woman McQueen reportedly put through hell, though. Steve McQueen supposedly similarly treated his second wife, Ali MacGraw, and dismissed countless other women who considered him a lover or confidant. 


  • According To His First Wife, McQueen Forced Her To Do Cocaine
    Photo: CBS Television / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    According To His First Wife, McQueen Forced Her To Do Cocaine

    Neile Adams met Steve McQueen in the 1950s after she came to the United States from the Philippines. The two married and went on to have two children together, Chad and Terry, during their 14 years of marriage.

    Adams knew McQueen was a womanizer and accepted he would have affairs with other women. She also knew McQueen did coke, but she didn't partake in it until one night when he asked her repeatedly to do so. 

    In her memoir, My Husband, My Friend: A Memoir, Adams recalled a night when McQueen wanted her to have a "toot," but she refused. The two fought and then McQueen attempted to get Adams to smoke a joint. She said no, and he pushed for the coke again.

    McQueen reportedly told her "I wish you wouldn't fight me on this. I promise you a little coke will make you feel better. I don't want you feeling bad, baby! No matter what happens, you're still my baby."

    To get him to leave her alone, she agreed. 

  • He Threatened Adams And Demanded She Admit She Was Cheating On Him
    Photo: Charles Guggenheim; John Stix / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    He Threatened Adams And Demanded She Admit She Was Cheating On Him

    On the same night Adams did coke with her husband, McQueen began asking her whether she'd ever had an affair. Adams - who was in a euphoric state - told McQueen, "Honey bunny, yours is not the only golden c*ck in the west, you know." She also told him that her lover had been an Academy Award winner, just to get under McQueen's skin.

    McQueen left the room and when he came back a few moments later, he grabbed Adams, held a gun to her head, and demanded she give him the name of her lover. He pushed the tool against her temple and told her "You'd better tell me now or you're not going to live to see him die! And I promise you I'll find out who the motherf*cker is! Make no mistake about that!"

    She then tearfully told him who it was - actor Maximilian Schell. 

  • Adams Had An Abortion Because Of McQueen's Behavior
    Photo: CBS Television / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    Adams Had An Abortion Because Of McQueen's Behavior

    McQueen reportedly had a strange double standard when it came to affairs. He was allowed to have as many as he wanted, but after Adams admitted to sleeping with one person, McQueen lost all trust. He would grill Adams about her relations, demanding to know every tiny detail.

    Adams became pregnant shortly after telling her husband about the affair. McQueen wouldn't accept the child was his. The emotional turmoil McQueen put Adams through pushed her to have an abortion. She flew to London to have the procedure done (they were living in France at the time). In her memoir, Adams explained why she could not have the child:

    "I wanted to be ready to act in case Steve's reaction to my condition was negative, as I expected it to be. As much as I would have wanted to have a new baby, there was no way I could withstand both the continuing physical and mental abuse and a pregnancy. I had to find out what the procedure would be."

    McQueen's distrust of his wife also led to physical confrontations and mental harm. On one occasion, he kicked her and called her a "wh*re." 

  • He Was Open About His Cheating With Adams
    Photo: Skeeze / Pixabay

    He Was Open About His Cheating With Adams

    Adams knew her husband slept with other women and claimed to be okay with it, but later admitted it did impact her confidence. According to Adams, ''I knew that his bed hopping meant no more to him than a drive around the block... as he used to say, 'You can only say no so many times.'" 

    In 1970, when Adams visited him on the set of Le Mans in France, McQueen arrived at the airport with a woman by his side to pick her up. Over the subsequent days, she saw all of the women fawning over her husband and called him out about it.  His response: "Look, I should tell you - there’ll be women coming from all over the world to visit me this summer."

  • McQueen Forbade His Wife Ali MacGraw From Working After They Were Married
    Photo: National General Pictures / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    McQueen Forbade His Wife Ali MacGraw From Working After They Were Married

    Steve McQueen met actress Ali MacGraw in 1972 on the set of their movie, The GetawayMacGraw was married to movie producer Robert Evans at the time, but she quickly fell in love with McQueen. McQueen was separated from Adams when the relationship started, and after MacGraw divorced Evans, the two were married. 

    MacGraw was a major film star in the early 1970s, most notably having stared in Love Story in 1970. After she married McQueen, however, she didn't work again until 1978 - the year they divorced. 

    McQueen put MacGraw through the same sort of questioning when it came to whether or not she had cheated on him. These manic grilling sessions would last for hours. McQueen forbade MacGraw from going back to work, threatened divorce, and offered to pay her not to work. 

  • McQueen Suggested His Wives All Live Together

    McQueen continued to return to his exes. After his divorce from MacGraw, they connected again for a brief period of time, while he was still with Barbara Minty – who he would later marry. According to MacGraw, on the day she visited her ex-husband to meet Minty, he told her he was going to marry her but propositioned MacGraw moments later.  

    Adams had a similar experience. In 1978, the two had a romantic rendezvous in Las Vegas. Supposedly McQueen said to her at the time, "Hey! Why can't you and me and Ali and Barbara all live under one roof?'