Graveyard Shift

Here’s Which Demon You Should Grab A Beer With According To Your Zodiac Sign  

Joesph Langdon
34.4k views 12 items

So you're in Hell, you're thirsty, and you're alone. Don't worry, astrology has your back, and can even tell you which demon you should grab a beer with by zodiac sign. It may sound like a bizarre, Dante-esque vacation, but it sure is better than getting possessed by demonic zodiac signs

Whether it's a sour ale with Ukobach or a Gose with Buer, astrological compatibility can help set you up with a lifetime friend. Or at the very least, a raucous evening with some demons.

Make sure to bring some aspirin, hangovers are at least five times worse in Hell.

Aries March 21 - April 19: Abigor
Aries March 21 - April 19: Abi... is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list Here’s Which Demon You Should Grab A Beer With According To Your Zodiac Sign
Photo: Louis Le Breton

If an Aries finds themselves looking for a friend in Hell, they should probably pay Abigor a visit. The grand duke commands over 60 legions and is a master in the art of warfare.

Abigor and an Aries would have a great time talking about past conquests and victories. The demon also knows secret ways to gain others' respect, which most Ariens would love to hear about over nice IPA.

Due to Ariens' competitive nature the night will probably end in a grand contest to see who can drink the most before they pass out.

Taurus April 20 - May 20: Mammon
Taurus April 20 - May 20: Mamm... is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list Here’s Which Demon You Should Grab A Beer With According To Your Zodiac Sign
Photo: Louis Le Briton

Mammon is a demon of avarice that would probably get along perfectly with a Taurus. It is said he first taught humans to plunder the Earth for gems and treasures.

Considering Taureans' work ethic and love of material reward, they'd certainly enjoy splitting a creamy stout with the demon. It will take some prying to wrestle Mammon's secrets to success from him, as he's a notoriously mysterious demon.

Taureans are up to the task though, and would do well to play on the spirit's greedy nature by gambling on a game of skill.

Gemini May 21 - June 20: Murmur
Gemini May 21 - June 20: Murmu... is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list Here’s Which Demon You Should Grab A Beer With According To Your Zodiac Sign
Photo: Devil Summoner: Soul Hackers/Atlus

Considering Geminis' love of intellectual conversation, they'd probably get along with the great duke and earl, Murmur. He gathers all sorts of secret information and teaches it to those who summon him.

After downing a couple of brown ales Murmur will almost certainly be willing to part with some sweet philosophical knowledge. Geminis with a propensity for the science of natural phenomena might even be able to debate him on his surely outdated ideas about what constitutes rigorous method.

Just be careful, his ability to summon any soul to answer questions acts as a built-in fact checker.

Cancer June 21 - July 22: Ukobach
Cancer June 21 - July 22: Ukob... is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list Here’s Which Demon You Should Grab A Beer With According To Your Zodiac Sign
Photo: Louis Le Breton

Cancers are the warm center of any home, which is what makes them such a perfect match for Ukoback, the demon who literally warms Hell.

The master of the infernal boilers is just as mysterious and hard-shelled as any Cancer. That said, he did invent frying and fireworks, so he's probably the life of any family get-together.

Cancers would probably love to share a sour ale with Ukobach and talk about the best way to get that golden-brown crust on a chicken thigh.