Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul movie quotes bring the laughs to the movie about a family on an adventurous road trip. The family comedy is the fourth in the Diary of a Wimpy Kid franchise based on the books by Jeff Kinney. Kinney co-wrote the screenplay along with David Bowers and Adam Sztykiel. Directed by David Bowers, Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul opened theatrically in the United States on May 19, 2017.
In Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul, Greg Heffley (Jason Drucker) is your typical kid who complains about typical kid things, such as having little control over his life. Along with brother Rodrick (Charlie Wright), Greg convinces parents Susan and Frank (Alicia Silverstone and Tom Everett Scott respectively) to go on a family road trip to Indiana.
While the guise of the road trip is to attend the boys' grandmother's 90th birthday party, really they want to attend a video game expo happening nearby. As easy as this may sound, surviving the road trip adventures and actually getting to the gamer expo is much harder than the brothers anticipated.
Zero Control Over Your Own Life
Greg: If there's one thing I've learned from my years as a being kid, it's that you have zero control over your own life.
Greg speaks to the camera in this Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul movie quote to discuss life as a kid. He talks about having zero control of his life, something he's like to be different.
That's a Mini Safe
Roderick: I got a microwave pizza.
Frank: Roderick, that's a mini safe.
Roderick: They disguised it as a microwave.
The family is stunned when Roderick mistakes the hotel safe for a microwave. Even after they correct him, he doesn't seem to understand.
Susan: Who's excited about the great Heffley road trip?
Susan asks her family how excited they are to go on a road trip to Indiana to attend the kids' grandmother's 90th birthday. Considering she receives little response, it's safe to say they're not that excited.
There's Only One
Greg: You want one?
Susan: Oh, Greg, I wouldn't encourage them.
Greg: There's only one.
Greg does a nice thing by offering a seagull a cheese snack in these Diary of a Wimpy Kid: The Long Haul movie quote. But that nice thing turns bad quickly when a whole flock of birds enter the car looking for snacks of their own.