13 Ridiculous Dinosaur Theories That People Somehow Believe Are True

Apparently, we’re not getting the real story when it comes to dinosaurs. While most people on planet Earth have been content since childhood to take the word of paleontologists, botanists, and researchers from a wide variety of fields, there are a few brave creative thinkers across the world who simply aren’t buying in. According to them, dinosaurs are just a giant lie made up to turn the La Brea Tar Pits into a popular tourist attraction. We’re all just cogs in the dino-industrial complex.

A simple glance through the Internet reveals dozens of examples of blogs, message boards, and even reputable news outlets that are willing to believe in dinosaur conspiracy theories with only a tenuous ounce of “proof.” In the absence of a walking, roaring, towering specimen to point to as definitive proof, scientists have been forced to go head-to-head with individuals of various intelligence levels who have some pretty unusual ideas about what happened millions of years ago.

Were dinosaurs real? That blissfully ignorant question is just the tip of the iceberg, as everyone from NBA stars to your local janitor have contributed their “expertise” to various conspiracy theories. Not every commonly accepted detail about dinosaurs is true - that's not where we got oil, for example - but such misconceptions are nothing for what the amateur sleuths of the internet have in mind. Here, for your consideration, are some of the craziest things people believe about dinosaurs.


  • Satan Planted Fossils To Test The Faith Of Christians

    As if famine, war, murder, rape, general nastiness, and the ongoing question of why bad things happen to good people weren’t enough to test the faith of Christians in the modern world, there is an incredibly small number of people who believe that Satan has nothing better or more diabolical to do with his time than to plant fake animal bones deep within the Earth and wait for humankind to wander off the path of righteous.

    Actually, it’s a pretty solid claim.

  • If Oil Is Made Of Dinosaurs, Why Aren’t Dinosaurs Found With Oil?

    If Oil Is Made Of Dinosaurs, Why Aren’t Dinosaurs Found With Oil?
    Photo: Charles R. Knight / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    In a response to his own Reddit post, user tigereyeearth explained his own reasoning behind the idea that dinosaurs couldn't have possibly existed. His simple question: “is it not odd that not a single drop of crude oil is discovered with any dinosaur skeleton?[sic].” Quite obviously, according to tigereyeearth, dinosaurs are just a marketing scheme created to make us all believe that fossil fuels are scarce so that big oil can drive up the prices. In fact, oil is a naturally replenishing resource that sits below the Earth’s oceans, “just like oil sits below water (or vinegar) in a salad dressing bottle.”

    Either that very plausible theory is totally true, or oil isn’t just dinosaur bones.

  • The Masons Invented Dinosaurs Because...World Domination?

    Dinosaurs are just one small part of the active thought oppression being used by the Masons to subtly control society. The proof is in Jurassic Park and the Ice Age films. See, apparently the dinosaur myth is just a fantastic cash cow, and evolution is a necessary part of the Masonic machine.

    So, the Masons have spent more than a century using fronts like National Geographic, Rupert Murdoch’s expansive media empire, and 20th Century Fox to perpetuate the myth that giant lizards once roamed the Earth. Apparently it makes sense from a financial standpoint.

  • Young Earth Creationists Believe That Men And Dinos Co-Existed

    There’s a sect of Christianity known as the Young Earth Creationists whose main beliefs focus around the idea that the Earth is only 6,000 years old. And since they use Biblical math to prove their point, there’s very little anyone can do to convince them that they’re wrong. Recently, one member actually sued the Grand Canyon for religious discrimination. And won.

    At any rate, one of the primary beliefs of the Young Earth Creationists is that mankind and dinosaurs once lived side by side - like on The Flintstones. One of these YEC guys, Kent Hovind, even opened up a theme park called Dinosaur Adventure Land designed to prove his point. Unfortunately, the IRS shut the park down and put Hovind in jail over some silly tax evasion stuff.

    Hovind claimed that the IRS was targeting religious groups, yet the IRS said that Hovind’s group wasn’t actually a real religious group, which is why he still had to pay taxes.

  • The Masons Invented Dinosaurs Because They Needed A Species To Tie Evolution Together

    The Masons Invented Dinosaurs Because They Needed A Species To Tie Evolution Together
    Photo: Franz Rösel von Rosenhof / Wikimedia Commons / Public Domain

    According to the AtlanteanConspiracy.com, dinosaurs are a hoax that was invented in the mid-1800s because evolution couldn't be proven without them (for some reason). The proof is obvious all thanks to a series of unanswerable questions posed by the author, which must be smart because they sound so simple.

    For instance, if dinosaurs existed, why weren’t they discovered before the 19th century? How was a scientist able to hypothesize a dinosaur without ever having seen one? How were scientists able to theorize an entire giant species based on a couple teeth? Obviously it was just a scientific conspiracy to launch the hugely profitable dino-hunting industry and lend legitimacy to the burgeoning theory of evolution. Duh.

  • Dinosaurs Are Living Right Under Our Feet

    Dinosaurs Are Living Right Under Our Feet
    Photo: Dinosaurs / ABC

    According to one man on the street, dinosaurs weren’t killed off by some comet, and they definitely didn't survive the blast and end up evolving into dumb birds. No, dinosaurs actually fled underground when the meteor struck.

    Once in their subterranean haven, these gigantic beasts with comparatively pea-sized brains managed to survive and evolve into reptilian humanoids. In the intervening millennia, they’ve created “vast underground cities around the world.”

    It’s hard not to hear that one without picturing Earl Sinclair and his family. In that context, an underground race of reptilian creatures isn’t such a crazy notion.