Jokes The Best Duck Jokes  

Jack Napier
3.8k votes 2.3k voters 46.8k views 18 items

List Rules Vote up any funny pun or quack about ducks

Funny duck jokes! If you too need a way to break the ice with that cute guy/gal at the your local coffee shoppe, check out this list of the funniest duck jokes ever!

These are the best jokes about ducks and duck puns. Like cheese and quackers. You know, stuff like that.

Vote for your favorite duck joke now!
list ordered by

1
356 299
Did You Hear About The Duck Wi... is listed (or ranked) 1 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
Did You Hear About The Duck With A Drug Problem?

He was a quackhead. 

2
396 385
At What Time Does A Duck Wake ... is listed (or ranked) 2 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
At What Time Does A Duck Wake Up?

At the quack of dawn. 

3
153 138
What Did Detective Duck Say To... is listed (or ranked) 3 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Did Detective Duck Say To His Partner?

"Let's quack this case!" 

4
88 88
What Do You Call A Clever Duck... is listed (or ranked) 4 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Do You Call A Clever Duck? A wise quacker

5
74 74
What Do You Call Two Ducks And... is listed (or ranked) 5 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Do You Call Two Ducks And A Cow? Quakers and milk. 

6
97 101
What Did The Duck Say When The... is listed (or ranked) 6 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Did The Duck Say When The Waitress Came?

Put it on my bill! 

7
196 216
What Do You Call A Duck That S... is listed (or ranked) 7 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Do You Call A Duck That Steals?

A robber ducky. 

8
71 78
What Did The Duck Say When He ... is listed (or ranked) 8 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Did The Duck Say When He Dropped The Dishes?

"I hope I didn't quack any!" 

9
83 93
Did You Hear About The Duck Wh... is listed (or ranked) 9 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
Did You Hear About The Duck Who Thought He Was A Squirrel?

It was one tough nut to quack. 

10
37 44
What Do Ducks Have With Soup? is listed (or ranked) 10 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Do Ducks Have With Soup? Quackers

11
66 79
What Do You Call A Cat That Sw... is listed (or ranked) 11 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Do You Call A Cat That Swallows A Duck?

A duck-filled-fatty-pus 

12
39 47
What Do Ducks Watch On TV? is listed (or ranked) 12 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Do Ducks Watch On TV?

Duck-umentaries! 

13
36 44
What Do Ducks Get After They E... is listed (or ranked) 13 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
What Do Ducks Get After They Eat? The bill!

14
72 88
Where Did The Duck Go When He ... is listed (or ranked) 14 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
Where Did The Duck Go When He Was Sick? To the ducktor!

15
36 45
Why Was The Teacher Annoyed Wi... is listed (or ranked) 15 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
Why Was The Teacher Annoyed With The Duck?

Because he wouldn't quit quackin' jokes! 

16
39 51
Why Are Ducks Bad Drivers? is listed (or ranked) 16 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
Why Are Ducks Bad Drivers? Their windshields are qwacked. 

17
43 58
How Do Ducks Talk? is listed (or ranked) 17 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
How Do Ducks Talk? They don't. You quack.

18
26 43
Did You Hear About The Duck Wh... is listed (or ranked) 18 on the list The Best Duck Jokes
Did You Hear About The Duck Who Wouldn't Pass Environmental Legislation?

He was a lame duck.