The Dumbest Questions Ever Asked To Retail Workers

Lowe Saddler
Updated August 24, 2018 847.6K views18 items

If you've ever worked in retail, you're all too familiar with certain customers' inane shopping habits. Even worse than obnoxious restaurant diners, bad shoppers are exceedingly aggressive and seemingly unintelligent. Many people know nothing about this dark side of retail, though. If you haven't experienced a bad customer, you probably don't how ridiculous their various questions can be. It seems farcical that someone would ask whether a turkey meatloaf tastes more like turkey or meatloaf... but that question has been asked.

Retail workers on Reddit are fed up with the crazy questions. They may be required to bite their tongues and answer everyone respectfully, but these employees are taking notes. If you tend to ask idiotic questions, know you're being judged. 

Photo: The 40-Year-Old Virgin / Universal Pictures

  • Eyeglasses Really Are Expensive

    From Redditor/u/Danwhodonit:  

    "Once, while working at an eye doctors office, a woman was upset because we were charging her to make new lenses with an updated prescription and asked, 'Why do you have to make new lenses, just inject some more medicine in the ones I already got?'"

  • The Kids Were Not Alright

    From Redditor/u/jra312:  

    "I worked at REI a few years back (large outdoor sporting goods co-op, just in case you haven't heard of it), and we sold bear spray (pepper spray for bears). A woman came in with her two kids one day and bought a canister because they were going camping. She gets to the front door, then comes back to the register as an afterthought, and asks if she's supposed to just spray her kids from head to toe with it."

  • So There Is Water In A Washing Machine Then?

    From Redditor/u/DragonDeadite:

    "'My washing machine is leaking water. Can you tell me where the water is coming from?'

    ...It took me almost 20 minutes to convince a full grown adult that water can literally come from ANYWHERE on a washing machine full of water!! Pump, hoses, valves, cracked tub, F*CKING ANYWHERE!! So how the hell am I supposed to know where the water is coming from just by the description of 'leaking?'

    And it isn't even like this is a UNIQUE question, either. I get this sh*t at least once every couple weeks... people just magically expect me to know where a washing machine is leaking from."

  • Bookstores Should Be Multi-Functional

    From Redditor/u/Baldulf:

    "Can you photoshop some pictures for me?

    Sir, this is a bookstore.

    Yeah, but I see you have a computer right here."

  • You Shouldn't Have To Pay For Something You Technically Used, Right?

    From Redditor/u/GrantRusticus:  

    "I was working at a car battery store when a customer came in with a receipt for a battery he had bought a couple weeks ago, asking for a refund. I asked him if he had the battery with him, so that we could take the battery back and refund him the money, when he said, 'No I don't have it anymore, I put it in a car I just sold.' Confused, I replied, 'You want us to refund you for a battery that you don't have anymore?' He responds, just as confused, 'Yeah well I don't have the battery anymore, so why should I have to pay for it? You need to refund me.'

    He did not leave the store happy that day."

  • The Bathroom Is Omniscient

    From Redditor/u/SenorBeef:  

    "- Hey, the bathroom door is locked. Can I get a key?

    - There's no key, if it's locked there's someone in there.

    - How does it know?

    - How does... what... know... what?

    - How does the bathroom know someone is in there?

    - People... people go in and then they lock the door while they're using it.

    [5 second pause]

    -Ohhhh."