Dungeon Masters Are Sharing Stories About The Useless Items Their Party Was Still Able To Exploit

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Vote up your favorite responses.

If you've ever played Dungeons & Dragons, you probably have a story or two about stories of everything being derailed — especially if you've ever been a Dungeon Master. DMs spend countless hours designing encounters and dungeons to take a party on an adventure. Still, some players can do things the DM couldn't have foreseen, and it's often annoying/hilarious, depending on the point of view.

One of the most annoying things a player can do is try something or use something that doesn't make any sense. When this is particularly frustrating (or hilarious), some Dungeon Masters head to Reddit to share stories about some of the most useless items their party was somehow able to exploit. It can be annoying, but it's nonetheless funny and fascinating at the same time.

  • 1
    46 VOTES

    A Rock Of Gravity Detection Used The DM's Words Against Them

    Posted by u/SonOfaFlynn·:

    I gave my players a "rock of gravity detection," which is exactly what it sounds like. They got it early on in the campaign and when dropped it would "accelerate until terminal velocity to the nearest center of gravity." So basically it was a rock that would just act like a normal rock. Until way later in the campaign they found themselves floating aimlessly through the Astral plane searching for the soul of another player trapped in a keep on a small chunk of land that had been previously transported to the Astral plane.

    They didn't have much to go on as, well, they were essentially floating in a void. Then one of my players pulls out the rock of gravity detection. I tried to argue that it's just a rock so it just floats there, but due to what I thought was clever wording, MY OWN WORDING, they argued it should accelerate towards the nearest center of gravity... yeah they found the keep...

  • 2
    37 VOTES

    A Wand Of Lesser Summon Somehow Just Became Fish

    Posted by u/DHFranklin:

    A wand of lesser summon. Only bringing out local creatures in celestial form.

    Fish. They picked fish. Just throwing trout in stacks to trigger traps and such. Need to slow down your pursuer? many fish. Need a distraction? Fish as thrown object.

    I told them that it can summon literally any local creature but on every character sheet was the word "Fish gun."

  • 3
    36 VOTES

    Tweezers Of Boat Bottling Became The Ultimate Weapon And Theft Device

    Posted by u/Silver_The_Bard:

    "Tweezers of boat bottling"

    "You have gained the ability to put ships into bottles with these tweezers."

    MF'ers were sneaking into dockyards at night and stealing entire fleets. And when the navy finally caught on they would sail away and toss said shrunken-boats-in-bottles at the navy boats following them, causing them to rapidly expand.

    Then they started to plan bottle-boat-ception, putting bottled boats onto full sized boats and then bottling that boat. Over and over again. Effectively creating a dozen boats to rapidly expand in one town by tossing one bottle. I had to shut that down quick.

  • 4
    31 VOTES

    A Magical Pigeon-summoning Whistle Cleverly Defeated An Orc Commander

    Posted by u/flamingtrucker94:

    Gave the party a magic whistle that summons pigeons, the party somehow used it to murder an orc commander by turning his armor into bread , having the pigeons eat it all , and then shooting him in the face with a blast of lightning.

  • 5
    58 VOTES

    A Magical Rubber Duck Killed An Entire Pit Of Deadly Piranhas

    Posted by u/ptorangekatie:

    Magical Rubber Duck - Turns whatever body of water it is in slowly into the perfect bath. As in warm and bubbly Chucked it in a piranha pit about 20 minutes later the piranhas were all dead from poisoning via soap.

  • 6
    20 VOTES

    A Rat Flute Helped Control A Known Criminal

    Posted by u/ptorangekatie:

    Rat Flute - Flute that summons a hoard of rats a la the pied piper, can also be used to control any rat-like being. Including a criminal known as 'the rat' simply because he's a snitch. Had a lot of fun with that.