Becoming a parent is one of the most rewarding things a person can do, but it isn't easy. If you're a new parent, or thinking of becoming one, you should know what to expect when you have kids. Luckily, these parents are sharing their most embarrassing kid stories.
- 172 VOTES
They Confused A Woman With A Disney Villain
From Redditor u/klairedee:
Oh geez. She yelled at the top of her lungs in Goodwill, "Mom, that lady's b**bs are huge! Way bigger than yours."
At Starbucks, "Mom, it's the mean witch!" Lady did kinda look like Mother Gothel from Tangled.
- 270 VOTES
They Wouldn't Let Their Parent Get Away With Stealthy Flatulence
From Redditor u/N79806:
In a busy Target with my 2-year-old son, and while shopping I had to fart. So we went down a vacant isle to "look" for something. Managed to keep it sounding like an extremely soft punt of a slightly underinflated football. If anyone heard it on the [aisle] over, they could have thought it was anything. Good, we can go on shopping.
Next thing I hear is a loud child's voice as giddy as only a 2-year-old's voice can be: "Daddy... You FARTED! HAHAHA." Instinctually I went into damage control mode. Had to loudly say "No I didn't!" in between multiple loudspeaker volume accusations to convince any near-byers.
As we left the [aisle], a lady exiting the [aisle] over briefly looked my way. I could see her holding in her laugh.
- 364 VOTES
They Told A Doctor That Their Breath Stinks
From Redditor u/AreThereRocksAhead:
Last year I had to take my (then 4-year-old...) daughter to the ER when she cut open her chin.
The doctor examines the cut with his face about 2 inches away from hers and he's talking to the nurse. My daughter tries to move away a bit, wrinkles her nose, and says, "Um... excuse me doctor, but your breath is REALLY stinky! Can you please go brush your teeth?"
I'm bright red and thinking, "Kid, do you really want to offend the person who decides whether your chin gets glued or repeatedly poked with a needle!?!"
- 492 VOTES
They Slapped A Stranger's Butt
From Redditor u/Sambehrs:
Around the house, my husband and I will playfully slap each other's butts in passing when the other is bent over doing something. When I was walking through the grocery store with my daughter, about 4 at the time, we passed a woman bent down looking at a display. My daughter slapped her butt as we walked by and I had a very difficult time not giggling while I apologized.
- 5100 VOTES
They Mixed Up 'Sm' And 'F' Sounds
From Redditor u/melbelleb:
I bring you: Scenes From Yesterday at the Grocery Store...
My younger son has childhood apraxia of speech [CAS]. This means we are talking to him and making him talk or repeat things constantly. He is adorable and often loud and happy, as he is 3. CAS has also led to some ongoing difficulties with certain sounds.
One issue is with s-blends at the beginning of words. For "sm" he substitutes the "f" sound. (So "smell" sounds like "fell.") Not a huge deal UNTIL during this grocery trip, I was looking for jam. Smucker's jam. Do you see where this is headed?
I'm having him repeat the things I'm looking for, like always. So I (out of habit) say, "Now I need strawberry jam. Smuckers." As I browse the section. He LOUDLY repeats, "I need strawberry jam, f*ckers!" I received equal amounts of amused and horrified looks. He repeats, "Mama needs strawberry jam, f*ckers!"
Luckily, I am used to his speech concerns, so I just (LOUDLY) said, "That's right, buddy! We need SMUCKERS jam! You are working SO hard to say things the right way!" I felt like I was doing publicity for Smuckers, the number of times I said the words correctly! Needless to say, we definitely had an eventful trip to the grocery store!
- 687 VOTES
They Thought A Person With An Eye Patch Was A Pirate
From Redditor u/ivy_tamwood:
I was grocery shopping with my daughter, then 2(ish). She's sitting in the cart and starts squinting one eye and yelling "Arrrrr" like a pirate. Does this a few times. I turn to pick something off the shelf and see a man behind me wearing an eye patch. Oops.