Ex-Goths Explain What Got Them Into Gothdom And Why They Ultimately Dropped It
The term "goth" is widely used to describe a youthful subculture that began in England during the 1980s and quickly spread to other parts of the world. Goths are sometimes interested in macabre subjects like death and the occult, and they enjoy music and literature that delves into those themes. Goths tend to wear black clothing made of velvet, lace, fishnets and leather. Clothing and jewelry might have occult designs, and makeup, worn by people of all genders, is usually black.
For some, being goth is a lifetime commitment, but others found that it was a phase that they grew out of. In certain corners of Reddit, people explain why they were goth, and why people stop being goth. These ex goth transformation stories include everything from no longer being able to afford the fashion, to realizing that belonging to a subculture limits personal growth. For whatever reason, all these former brooders decided to say so long and goodnight to their old way of life.
You Can't Get An Engineering Job Wearing Bondage Pants
From Redditor /u/scarlet_ibis:
Standard middle school angst/depression/poetry thing, along with a love of symphonic metal. I grew out of it by my mid-teens, although I still do write poetry (although it's gotten significantly better). I also still wear a lot of black, but it's more 'I'm lazy and it goes with everything' black than 'THIS MATCHES MY SOUL' black. Still like metal, too.
I think the reason I grew out of it mostly had to do with increasing self-esteem and more friends. Also the realization that it's impossible to get an engineering job wearing bondage pants and a leather corset.
The Goth Dudes Were Too Creepy
From Redditor /u/uberlamps:
I really liked Bauhaus? And I liked how the style looked. Why I stopped dressing that way? There were creepy guys who would think I was like a suicide girl. Being stalked is not fun. Especially when you live on campus so everyone knows where you live.
An Interesting Side-Effect Of Gothdom
From Redditor /u/LemonicDemonade:
I felt insecure. I moved to a new state the summer of 8th grade. So when I started high school, I started dressing goth. I had no friends, I was depressed, I wore 4lb steel-toe boots, arm socks, a black vest that went down to my knees, long, flowy witch looking skirts.
And if anyone didn't like me, it was because they were narrow-minded, and judged me by the way I dressed. It was a way I could ignore people who were mean, or judgmental.
I stopped dressing like that when I gained a little confidence. And that started after I met some amazing, awesome emo gay pagan friends. When I was able to walk down the halls, without dressing like a freak, when I was able to accept that people may judge me, and hate me, just for being me.
Those boots though, gave me an *ss of steel. My *ss was literally like granite when I flexed it. I am 98% sure it was because of the extra weight I carried due to those boots. It was a great conversation starter. A friend would mention my *ss, and then I would flex it, and ask them to punch it. They were amazed every time.
Not A Goth, Just Cold
From Redditor /u/KamieTheOtaku:
People assumed I was goth or emo or whatever in middle school because of the clothes I wore when it was cold, I have low blood pressure so black clothes seemed smart. Somehow it was shocking when I wore a sundress that I liked to school on a really hot day.
I'm not goth, I'm just cold.
A New Car Trumps Being Goth Any Day
From Redditor /u/tzivje:
Did it cause I felt like I didn't fit in with other kids in high school.
Stopped because, well... my Mom said if I started wearing colorful clothes she'd buy me a car.
It Was Emotionally Exhausting
From Redditor /u/-Nick-:
I guess I became a goth in middle school. My best friend had an older sister who always wore black, fishnets, red hair, gothic-romantic jewelry and decorations all over her room. She was also friendly. When my friend and I were 13 she'd take us to crazy 18-year-old goth parties where one guy had a double zero gage through his tongue and other people were doing everything from piercing their lips in the bathroom to smoking pot, . She gave us beer and drove us to shows, and she taught us how to meet the bands afterwards. I was accepted by all of them and looked up to them. I didn't shop at Hot Topic or anything, but I did color my hair all different colors, painted my nails black, and wore lots of band shirts and tall black leather boots. I definitely acted the part, though.
I stopped in 10th grade pretty abruptly after taking shrooms for the first time. I realized during the trip that I was acting like an *sshole to so many people, especially my mom. I was always easily upset and moody, but after that trip I just got so emotionally exhausted with being negative and gloomy all the time.
I still listen to Gothic music sometimes. When I tell my friends now (I'm a 27-year-old English teacher) they don't believe me.